The Antivirus of Yuki Nagato
by Alfonso Ling
Summary: NEW CHAPTER 20: PICTURE PARTY. During a routine scan of the Internet, the Data Integration Thought Entity picks up a nasty virus that affects all associated with it, including Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura. Eradication leads to romance for Nagato when Taniguchi saves the day. Will Ryoko be as fortunate when she pursues the apple of her eye (initials H.S.)?
1. Nurse's Office

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**The Antivirus of Yuki Nagato**

by Alfonso Ling

**Chapter 1: Nurse's Office**

* * *

Taniguchi, Kunikida and Kyon sat on the bleachers facing the running track. After running the required eight laps in much less than the requisite time of thirty minutes, the three were resting and watching their fellow classmates partake in P.E.

"I can't believe how few hot girls there are in this school," Taniguchi said, scanning the scene before him.

"You're so full of crap it makes my head hurt," replied Kyon. "This school is loaded with beautiful girls. You just need to pull your head out of your ass, brother."

"He means hot girls that will go out with him, Kyon" Kunikida said.

"I see. Well, mathematically that group could be represented as a set with about, oh um, zero elements."

"Since when did you become such a math whiz?" replied Taniguchi. "Just because you're in a club with a few hot girls doesn't make you Don Juan. Heck, they're all psycho if you ask me."

"Miss Asahina isn't psycho," Kunikida said. "She's a wonderful person. She just won't date anybody."

"Same difference," Taniguchi replied. "And Suzumiya?"

"Psycho!" the three guys said in unison. Then they laughed.

"What about Miss Nagato?" Kunikida asked. "She's not really psycho. She just seems kind of shy. You gave her an A-minus once, remember?"

Taniguchi nodded. "I must admit, I think Miss Nagato is fine… in that hot librarian sort of way. I wouldn't kick her out of bed for throwing up on the sheets."

"Huh?" Kyon and Kunikida gave Taniguchi a perplexed look.

Taniguchi looked back at them sheepishly. "Okay, I know that sounded odd, but I'm thinking about last period. You see how Ryoko Asakura isn't out there today? Well she walked into the nurse's office this morning looking sort of pale. Then she tossed her cookies all over the floor! It was sort of sad."

"So you're still helping out at the nurse's office?" asked Kyon.

"Sure am. I get full class credit for it, too. It's a cake job. But sometimes you get to see things like that."

"So Miss Asakura no longer has a double A-plus rating in your book?" Kunikida asked. "Cause she threw up and you had to clean up the mess?"

"Nope. I'm upping her to triple-A! I managed to peek down her shirt when she was bent over hurling." He held out his cupped hands. "That girl's chest is fine!" He nodded with a sly smile. "Besides, everybody gets sick now and then. I was out for half of last week myself."

"You're always getting sick since you started working there," said Kunikida.

"Makes sense," said Kyon. "After all, the nurse's office is where everyone's germs come to visit before they head home."

Taniguchi crossed his arms across his chest. "I may be getting sick a little more, but my immune system is becoming extra strong. After fighting off all this stuff in high school, I probably won't get sick for the rest of my life!"

"What was wrong with Asakura?" asked Kyon.

Taniguchi shrugged. "I don't know. It was weird. She seemed a little out of it. She said some thought entity thingy was fighting a malicious virus and it was affecting her… or something like that. The nurse put her on the bench, checked her temperature, and sent her right home."

"Did anybody else come to the nurse's office with a virus?" asked Kyon.

"Nope. Just Miss Asakura."

"Did you peek under her skirt when she was lying on the nurse's bench?" Kunikida asked with a knowing smirk.

An offended Taniguchi shot back, "Of course not! What kind of a guy do you take me for?"

Kyon and Kunikida looked at each other. Then they turned back to Taniguchi and said, in unison, "A pervert!"

Taniguchi smiled. "I tried to get a peek. But the nurse closed the door to the examination room. I got a chair and looked through the vent above the door. I didn't see anything, though. The nurse didn't make Asakura undress." He chuckled. "I've got another stint over there last period. If any other _hot_ nauseous girls come in, I'll let you know what I learn."

* * *

Haruhi Suzumiya burst into the SOS Brigade club room, emitting more energy than a thousand watt microwave oven. So she was quite disturbed when she found Yuki Nagato sitting at the table with her head down in her arms.

"Do you feel okay?" Haruhi asked.

Nagato lightly shook her head. "No."

Haruhi walked over and laid her hand on Nagato's back. It felt a little warm to her touch. "I think you might have a fever, Yuki. Maybe you caught a virus or something."

Nagato nodded weakly. "Yes."

"I think you should go to the nurse's office."

"That is not necessary. I will be fine. My systems are battling the virus."

Haruhi put her hands on her hips. "As the Brigade leader, I am giving you a command, Yuki Nagato! You and I are going to the nurse's office this very minute!"

Nagato looked up into Haruhi's determined eyes. She knew Haruhi wasn't going to let her wait it out. She lifted her head and pushed her hands down on the table. Though it took a bit of effort, Nagato stood up and faced her commander. "You have Brigade business to attend to. I can make it to the nurse's office on my own."

Haruhi looked down at Nagato. "Well, I was going to go over some ideas I had for our next Arts Festival project with everyone. But your health is much more important!"

"I will be fine."

"Do you give me your word you'll go directly to the nurse's office and get yourself checked out?"

Nagato nodded.

"Well okay then. I guess that's okay. You don't seem to be coughing or sweating or anything. You're just a little warm."

Nagato stepped past Haruhi toward the door. When she opened it, Mikuru Asahina walked in. "Hi Miss Nagato!" the busty girl said with a warm smile. Nagato gave her a glassy-eyed nod and shuffled down the hall toward the stairs.

As she walked, Nagato had difficulty keeping to a straight line. She found her shoulders brushing against the side walls on a couple of occasions. Still she kept moving, determined to keep her promise to her Brigade leader.

Ten minutes later Nagato miraculously found herself standing in front of the nurse's station door. Though she'd gotten some concerned stares from fellow students, no one had interrupted her arduous trek. She knocked on the door a couple times but there was no reply. She tried the door knob, but it would not turn.

Nagato looked up at the "Nurse's Office" sign above the door again and frowned. "I promised," she said softly to herself. She gripped the doorknob tightly and slowly turned it 90 degrees. The sound of the crunching locking mechanism did not faze her. When she pushed the knob forward, the door swung open into the waiting room. Nagato closed the door and walked over to a row of chairs. She lay down across three of them and closed her eyes.

After ten minutes and forty-five seconds of resting, Nagato heard the doorknob turning and the door swinging forward. She didn't care.

"I for-for-for-got my bag!" said a pleasant male voice. Followed by a less pleasant, "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" Taniguchi closed the door and walked over to the reclining Yuki Nagato. "Miss Nagato," he said. "Are you okay?"

With a foggy head, Nagato looked up at her visitor. "I was instructed to come to the nurse's office for an examination."

"But it's after school hours," Taniguchi replied. "The nurse goes home after the last period. I was on my way home, too, but I forgot my bag."

Nagato squinted and tilted her head. "You for-for-for-got it?"

Taniguchi looked down at the ailing girl and furled his eyebrows. Though he'd spent very little time in her company, he knew that Miss Nagato was not being herself. "There's a virus going around," he said. "Ryoko Asakura was in here earlier. I think there's a chance you may have caught what she got."

"Yes. The Data Integration Thought Entity contracted a virus during a routine scan of the Internet. We are all affected. However we will all be fine after the system eradicates the virus and resets."

"Huh?" Taniguchi shook his head. Something was definitely off with this girl. She was obviously delirious. "May I feel your forehead?"

Nagato nodded. However when Taniguchi moved his hand over her forehead, Nagato grabbed it and forced his fingers into her mouth.

"WHAAAAAAAAT!" Taniguchi pulled back his hand and grabbed it. "Why did you do that?"

"Surface temperature readings are inaccurate. At a minimum, you must take an oral reading."

Taniguchi looked around as he wiped his hand off on his trousers. "The nurse usually uses a thermometer for that. But she's gone and she always locks everything up before she leaves."

Nagato took a deep breath. She sat up and looked into Taniguchi's eyes. "I promised Miss Suzumiya I would come to the nurse's office and get checked out."

"The nurse isn't here," Taniguchi replied. "I'm just an assistant that cleans up and hands out forms."

With a blank sleepy face Nagato looked up into the nurse assistant's eyes. "I promised."

Taniguchi shrugged. "Well, okay. I'll do what I can." He pointed to the examination room. "She usually has the students go in there and lay down on the bench."

Nagato nodded and with wavering steps walked through the door and over to the bench. Once there, she crawled up onto it and collapsed forward belly down. She rested her head in her arms and with a satisfied sigh said, "Much more comfortable."

Taniguchi looked down at the reclining girl and shook his head. A sly smile crossed his lips. He stepped behind her feet, bent forward, and tried to peek up her skirt. Unfortunately he couldn't see much.

"Are you examining me?" Nagato asked.

Taniguchi straightened up with a start. Caught red handed, he stood there silently. Finally he was able to emit an "Ummmmm."

Nagato reached her hand back. "This will help." She flipped up her skirt, revealing the white panties covering her bottom. "How does it look?"

After taking several deep breaths, Taniguchi looked down at Nagato's firm shapely derriere. "Definitely 'A' material."

Nagato nodded. "Should I undress for you?"

"WHAAAAAAAAT?!" Taniguchi ran to the opposite side of the examination room. He took a few more deep breaths and put his hands over his face. Once he regained his composure, he slowly walked back toward his patient. "Look Miss Nagato. I admit I'm a little bit of a pervert sometimes. And I admit that I think you're a very attractive girl. But it's obvious you're not quite yourself because of the virus and I'm not going to take advantage of you like that."

The groggy, hazy-eyed girl rolled over onto her side and looked at Taniguchi. She nodded her head and said, "Will you take my temperature?"

"I don't have a thermometer. And I really don't think my fingers will work. They're not all that sensitive."

Nagato nodded. "The most sensitive part of the human male's body is the frenulum."

"Huh? What's that?"

"It is the most sensitive part of your body. You may use it to gauge my temperature in relation to yours. If my mouth feels warm to your frenulum, I have a fever. If it does not feel warm or feels cold, then I do not have a fever. In either case, your examination will be complete."

Taniguchi shrugged and looked at his hands. "I'll do my best to help you out, Miss Nagato, but I have no idea what a frenulum is."

"It is the tip of the underside of your penis."

"WHAAAAAAAAT?!"

"Please place your frenulum on my tongue." Nagato opened her mouth wide.

"Look Miss Nagato, I know I told you I'd do my best to help you out, but…" Taniguchi looked into Nagato's weak desperate eyes. For some reason she really needed him to do this.

Suddenly Taniguchi knew that he could not let her down. Nagato moved back onto her belly with her mouth wide open, awaiting the insertion of Taniguchi's thermometer. Not surprisingly Taniguchi's penis hardened the second he pulled it through his zipper. He slowly moved forward and cautiously laid his frenulum down on his patient's tongue.

Nagato closed her mouth around Taniguchi's shaft and started moving her head up and down, even as her tongue moved from side to side over the nurse assistant's frenulum.

"Oh damn!" Taniguchi gasped. "That feels incredible!"

Nagato stopped and opened her mouth. Taniguchi looked down at her for a few seconds before getting the message. He slowly stepped back.

"Did you get a reading?" she asked.

Taniguchi reached down and grabbed his penis. "To be honest, I didn't. What you were doing with your tongue felt so good, I really didn't notice if your mouth was hot or cold."

Nagato nodded. "It is my fault. I am not functioning optimally. My human emotions took over and I instinctively sought to pleasure you."

"I wouldn't mind trying again."

Nagato shook her head. "It won't work. You will not get an accurate reading."

Taniguchi frowned as his penis softened in his hand. "Damn. Is there another way? I was really enjoying that."

Nagato nodded. "Yes. Take my rectal temperature. It will be more accurate." Nagato slid off of the bench onto her feet. She reached under her skirt and pushed her panties down to the ground before stepping out of them. Then she turned, spread her legs, and bent forward over the bench.

"WHAAAAAAAAT?!"

"Lift my skirt. Then push your penis deep into my rectum. It will be the upper orifice."

Taniguchi looked down at Nagato's skirt. "Trust me," he said. "I've watched enough porn to know which hole you're talking about." He lifted the skirt and took a peek at Nagato's bum. He nodded approvingly. "Won't it hurt?"

Nagato nodded. "Yes. Thank you. Please reinsert your penis in my mouth and I will lubricate it with my saliva." After pausing a few moments to build up an adequate reservoir of saliva in her cheeks, Nagato turned, knelt, and opened her mouth. Taniguchi once again rested his penis on Nagato's tongue. Nagato liberally coated Taniguchi's penis with her saliva.

When she nodded, Taniguchi understood. Nagato quickly stood up and bent over the bench. Taniguchi, wet wick in hand, flipped up Nagato's skirt and slowly pushed himself deep into her anal orifice.

Fortunately this time Nagato managed to remain completely still. "Your assessment?" she asked thirty seconds after thermometer insertion.

"A-plus!" Taniguchi replied as he looked down in disbelief at what he was doing. "You have a beautiful ass, Miss Nagato."

Nagato tilted her head and looked back. "_Temperature_ assessment?"

"Oh that." Taniguchi took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and tried to focus on what his frenulum was feeling. To his surprise he saw a number materialize in his mind's eye. "Wow… I don't know how I'm doing this, but I'm getting that you have a rectal temperature of 101.3 degrees. That's kind of high." He opened his eyes and smiled. "I had no idea I could do that!" He absentmindedly started rocking his hips back and forth, relishing the feeling of his thermometer moving in and out of his patient. He froze when he heard Nagato groan, and pulled himself out of her. "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking just now. Did I hurt you?"

Nagato pushed herself up off of the bench and straightened. Her skirt fell down over her bum. "No. I am fine. I do not know why I made that sound. I believe it was another instinctive response."

Taniguchi put himself away and crossed his arms over his chest. "Well, Miss Nagato, I believe you have a fever."

Nagato nodded. "Yes." Suddenly her eyes rolled up into her eyelids and she collapsed forward into Taniguchi's arms.

Taniguchi laid Nagato back down on the bench. "Oh man, Miss Nagato. This is bad! I wish I could help you." He looked around at all the locked cabinets. "Normally the nurse gives the student a shot or something. You know, antibiotics or penicillin." He threw up his arms. "I really don't know what to do."

Nagato looked up weakly. "I will be fine. My data uplink will reset in 71.22 hours."

Taniguchi shook his head. "I have no idea what you're talking about, Miss Nagato, but I _don't_ think you're getting better. You know, I caught something like this just last week. Had a 101 fever. But I kicked it fast." He showed Nagato his wrist. "I've got more antibodies running through my veins than you could imagine! I just wish I could share some of them with you." Taniguchi pulled up a chair and sat next to Nagato. "You know, I cleaned up Ryoko Asakura's vomit this morning. I'm sure it was loaded with virus particles." He held up his hand. "It didn't affect me a bit." He put his hand to his forehead. "No fever. No nothing."

Nagato opened her eyes and gave Taniguchi a funny look. Then she looked up at the ceiling. "The human body is a very complex biological mechanism," she said. "As a bio-computational device, its immune system is quite formidable." She turned toward Taniguchi. "Please give me your fluids."

"Huh?"

"Please inject me with your fluids."

"I don't have access to any hypodermic needles."

Nagato slid off the bench and faced Taniguchi. "Since we are of the opposite sex, we can employ the procedure normally utilized for procreation."

"WHAAAAAAAAT?!" Taniguchi jumped back.

"Inject me with your antibodies. Insert your penis into my other orifice."

"Yes. I know what you're saying. But I've never done anything like that before!"

Nagato nodded. "I understand. Neither have I. However the process is widely practiced among humans and it does not seem difficult. Once your antibodies are inside me, I believe my body can synthesize an adequate response."

Taniguchi couldn't believe his ears. "I… I don't know if I can…"

Nagato looked down at her feet. "You cannot help me?"

"Look, Miss Nagato, I know I can be a jerk sometimes, but this doesn't seem right to me. Don't get me wrong. The thermometer stuff we just did was crazy, and sort of fun. But real sex? We've never even kissed."

"Sharing saliva would be inadequate."

"I don't care about that. Here's the thing… Can I kiss you first? It would mean a lot to me."

Nagato considered his request for a few moments, then softly said, "Yes."

As Taniguchi stepped forward, Nagato looked up into his eyes. He put his arms around the shorter girl's waist and pulled her close. Their heads tilted slightly to the right as their lips approached. Once again, Nagato emitted a subconscious moan as their lips pressed together.

"Thanks," Taniguchi said as they parted. He smiled down at Nagato's flushed but content face. "I'm ready to provide that injection now."

Nagato nodded, turned, and bent over the bench. Taniguchi dropped his pants and positioned his injector at the entrance of Nagato's other orifice. Nagato gasped when Taniguchi thrust his rock hard penis deep inside of her vagina. What followed seemed to come naturally to both of them. Nagato, feeling more energetic than she had in days, moved her hips in sync with Taniguchi's rhythmic thrusts. To Taniguchi's delight, Nagato's emotions started taking over again; she moaned loudly in time with each of his thrusts.

"OH DAMN!" Taniguchi shouted. "HERE IT COMES!" His eyes bulged and he bit his lower lip as he released his anti-viral payload deep inside of Nagato's womb.

Nagato's eyes went wide with shock when an unfamiliar feeling possessed her body. "OHHHHHH DAMN!" she echoed her lover as an intense orgasm took hold of her diminutive frame. "OHHHHHH! OHHHHH DAAAAMMMMMN!" she shouted again, when another wave of bliss rocked her to her core. She breathed rapidly as several powerful sub-tremors shook her body.

Taniguchi collapsed on top of the panting girl, his injector still hard and deep inside of his patient. "Wow. That was incredible." Taniguchi gently pulled out of Nagato with a wide satisfied smile. He reached down and pulled up his pants. "How do you feel?" he stammered.

Still comfortably bent over, Nagato turned her head toward her companion and with glowing eyes said, "I feel… very good. Sex with you was… wonderful." Testing her strength, she pushed herself up off of the table and turned. Once again her skirt fell down into place.

"Cool!" Taniguchi gushed. His face lit up like a light bulb. "I mean… Thanks!"

Nagato looked around the room and then up at Taniguchi. "I feel much better. The antibodies synthesized from your fluids have destroyed the virus. I am operating at optimal levels again. Thank you."

Taniguchi shrugged. "It was nothing. I was glad to help you out."

Nagato bowed and paused for a few seconds. "I must go now." She turned toward the door.

"Wait," Taniguchi took her arm; Nagato turned back. "Miss Nagato. Would you please go out with me?"

Nagato considered Taniguchi's request for three and a half seconds, then said, "I would love to."

She pulled open the door and stepped through it into the hall. Before closing the door behind her she turned once again.

"In the future… please call me Yuki," she said, with a tiny smile.

* * *

**Author's Notes: I always liked the Taniguchi character from the anime in large part because I think the voice actor for the English series, Sam Riegel, does such a great job with it. He's so expressive. I tried to imagine that voice when I wrote this, especially the sound he makes ("Whaaaaat?!") when he finds Kyon holding Yuki on the classroom floor. **

**We always get the feeling that Taniguchi has a thing for Nagato and what could be a more natural way for them to get together than this, right? If you liked the chapter and it made you smile or laugh, I hope you'll take the time to PM me or leave a (spoiler free) review. Thanks for reading! - Al Ling**


	2. Upgrades

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**Chapter 2: Upgrades**

* * *

"Guess what?"

Kyon and Kunikida stared at Taniguchi, waiting for him to answer his own question. When no answer came, Kyon finally asked, "What?"

"I have a date with Yuki Nagato this weekend!"

"No way!" said Kunikida.

"You've got to be kidding!" added Kyon.

"We haven't decided what we're going to be doing yet, but the time is set. You guys have any suggestions? Miss Nagato said she'd be up for whatever I suggest."

"What does she like to do?" Kunikida asked.

"I'm still not sure I believe you," said Kyon. "But if by some crazy quirk of fate what you're saying is true, I can share this - she really likes to read... mostly science fiction. To tell the truth, I don't think she does much else besides reading sci-fi and staying home in her apartment. I don't think you two have much in common."

"I don't know about that, Kyon," Kunikida said. "Nagato's life sounds a lot like Taniguchi's – just replace the reading science fiction part with watching porn."

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Taniguchi put up his hands. "I know you two are joking, but you can stop now. I admit I tend to talk big, but this is for real. I could really use some good advice. This girl is very special."

"Any girl that would go out with you is special," replied Kunikida, making quote marks with his fingers when he said the word "special".

Kyon turned to Kunikida. "Let's give our friend a break here. As you know, I'm familiar with Nagato and I have to concur with what Taniguchi's saying. Nagato is a very special girl. I don't think she's ever been in a relationship. If what Taniguchi is saying is true – and I'm still not sure of that - then this could be good for her."

Taniguchi nodded. "Thanks buddy. I agree. That's what relationships are about. They force you to stretch, to expand your horizons, to think beyond yourself. I learn from her and she learns from me." He smiled. "Fortunately, if we do run in to rough spots, there's one area where we're completely compatible."

"Oh yeah?" asked Kyon. "And what area would that be?"

"We are totally compatible in bed. If you don't mind me bragging, sex with this girl is outta sight!"

Both Kyon's and Kunikida's mouths dropped open. "No way…"

"That's right guys. Yuki Nagato and I are officially lovers. She came over to the nurse's office the other day, after hours, with a virus… one thing led to another and…" Taniguchi started rhythmically pushing his right index finger into his curled up left hand. "Let me tell you. That girl's ass is fine! I've officially upgraded her to an A-plus!"

"You know we don't believe a word you're saying," said Kyon, as Kunikida shook his head in disbelief. "And you better not start spreading rumors around school. Nagato is a friend of mine. If one word of this little fantasy of yours gets around…" Kyon made a fist.

"No way, man! I would never do that! I have way too much respect for the girl." Taniguchi gave his friends an angry glare before his eyes softened. "But it's true! I had sex! With a real life breathing girl! You guys are my best buds and I had to tell somebody about it before I blew up!"

"Well, what happened?" Kunikida asked. "Spill the beans already!"

"No. Kyon's right. I'm a gentleman and out of respect for Yuki, I'm not going to say another word."

"You're even calling her Yuki, huh?" Kyon said. He shook his head and got up. "Later guys. I've gotta bolt."

* * *

Kyon entered the SOS Brigade club room five minutes later. He wasn't surprised to find Yuki Nagato sitting alone, in her chair, with a book in her lap. He walked up to her, folded his arms across his chest, and looked down. "Nagato. Did you have sex with Taniguchi yesterday?"

Nagato looked up from her book. "Yes."

"Look Yuki, I know sex is a very personal thing and I don't want to pry into your personal life, but … well, there are consequences."

"I will not get pregnant," Nagato answered. "I have complete control of my menstrual cycle."

"I figured as much. Hey," Kyon squinted. There was something slightly different about Nagato. He wasn't sure what it was. "You've changed. But I can't put my finger on what it is."

Nagato put down her book and stood up. She put her hands behind her back. "I have increased the size of my breasts. Do they seem adequate?"

Kyon looked down at Nagato's new bosom. Sure enough, that's what it was. Though it wasn't a change most people would notice considering the conservative nature of her usual attire, Nagato's chest definitely looked fuller. "From where I'm standing, your breasts look fine." He bent forward to get a closer look. "If you ask me, the size is perfect."

"I increased their size to match those of Haruhi Suzumiya… proportionally."

Kyon nodded. No wonder they looked so good. "Why not Asahina?"

Nagato shrugged. "Too much change."

"Good thinking. Unless someone was studying your chest every day, they probably won't notice your upgrade. Though I'm sure there'll be a guy or two that will." Kyon chuckled. "Jump to Asahina-size and everyone will be thinking, 'Boob job!'" Kyon straightened and raised his view up a few inches to Nagato's eyes. "Why did you do it?"

"I wish to look attractive to Taniguchi."

"So you two really did have sex yesterday. I still can't get my mind around that." Kyon put his finger to his chin. "Hey, won't _he_ notice a difference?"

"We remained partially dressed."

Kyon nodded. "I see. I'm getting the impression you're looking forward to seeing him again."

"Yes… I am."

"Well Nagato, I hope you know what you're doing."

* * *

It was noon on a bright and sunny Saturday afternoon. Taniguchi stood in the shade of Yuki Nagato's apartment building. He looked up again to verify the building's address matched the one written on the bookmark in his hand. Yep, this was Yuki's home. He stepped up to the intercom and pressed "*708#". The door buzzed soon after, signaling that it was unlocked.

Moments later Taniguchi stood in front of Yuki Nagato's apartment door. He knocked three times. When the door swung open, Yuki Nagato stood before him, dressed in her school uniform.

"Huh? You're still dressed for school? On a Saturday?"

"I could change into something else, if you wish."

Taniguchi smiled, his perverted brain kicking into gear. "Miss Nagato… are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?"

"I cannot read your thoughts. Also… please call me Yuki."

"Okay, Yuki. Let me give you a hint." Taniguchi stepped forward, put his arms around Yuki's waist, and pulled her close for a kiss. When their lips parted, Yuki looked up at him with a content, small smile. "Whaddaya say we _both_ change into something more comfortable?"

Yuki nodded. She turned and led Taniguchi back to her bedroom.

* * *

Yuki's bedroom was simple and stark. No pictures or posters adorned the walls and no furniture cluttered the space. Nagato and Taniguchi lay next to each between the room's only elements; a thin cushion topped by a large comforter; side by side, naked.

Taniguchi moved his hands forward and fondled Nagato's full breasts. "I never realized how nice your breasts were, Miss—I mean, Yuki. They're perfect."

Yuki nodded, almost proudly. She reached down and took hold of Taniguchi's penis. "I am enjoying the current size of this body part as well. My calculations indicate that you have enough reserve for one more coupling."

"Yuki," Taniguchi replied with a smile. "I really like your math."

* * *

Taniguchi pulled his boxer shorts on and walked over to Yuki's closet. "You really don't have a whole lot of clothes, do you?" He lifted a second school uniform off of its hanger. It was the only garment hanging in the closet. "Maybe we could go do some clothes shopping today."

Yuki pulled up her panties and stepped up next to Taniguchi. "I am in need of a new bra."

"Great. Then it's a date. I really didn't have a set plan in mind when I came to see you today. I'm sorry about that, but to be honest I don't know you that well. Kyon told me you liked to read but that's not really much to go on. What else do you like to do?"

"I enjoy having sex with you."

Taniguchi's face lit up in an ear to ear grin. "That makes two of us." He bent forward and kissed Yuki on the lips. "But if we're going to start going out and doing stuff, you really need to have more things to wear. I'm not a clothes expert by any means, but I am a student of attractive high school girls and I know what looks good. And I don't mean slutty."

"I would like to go shopping with you."

Taniguchi handed Nagato her school uniform. "Great. Just put this on for now. Let's go to the Nakamichi Mall and find something nice for you to wear. My treat."

"I have money."

"I'll make you a deal. Let me buy your first outfit, okay? Then you can pay for the rest."

Nagato nodded.

* * *

Taniguchi watched the numbers above the door as the elevator made its way to the lobby. He looked down at his date, whose unmoving eyes stared unblinkingly at the crack of the elevator's door. When the doors opened, Taniguchi waited politely for Nagato to exit before following her out into the street. Nagato stopped near a cab idling at the curb.

"I think the train would be fastest," he said.

Nagato nodded.

The two walked hand in hand along the sidewalk toward the train station five blocks away.


	3. First Date

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**Chapter 3: First Date  
**

* * *

Nagato and Taniguchi hopped onto the commuter train seconds before it pulled out of the station. Taniguchi spotted an empty forward-facing bench seat in the back of the half full passenger car and pointed toward it. Nagato sat down in the seat next to the window. Taniguchi parked beside her.

Taniguchi peeked past Nagato through the thick glass. "I hate riding sideways or backwards," he said. "I don't know why, but it just feels better when I'm facing in the direction I'm going."

Nagato glanced out the window and nodded.

"I noticed you live alone," Taniguchi said. "Do you have any family?"

Nagato paused for several seconds before replying, "I live alone."

"Where are your parents?"

Another long pause, then, "I do not know."

"No kidding?" Taniguchi shot his date a surprised look. "Are you an orphan? Or adopted?"

Nagato nodded. "… Something like that."

"Got any brothers or sisters you know about?"

"… No."

The two sat quietly for a few minutes, Taniguchi studying the passing neighborhoods as they whizzed by, while Nagato looked forward.

Taniguchi took his date's hand. "Look Yuki. I know you're a quiet person by nature, but let's take this time to get to know each other." He laid his hand on her thigh. "I know there's got to be more to you than a pretty face." He squeezed her leg. "And a totally knock-out body!"

Nagato looked over and up at Taniguchi. The sincere, somewhat crude compliment evoked a tiny smile. "Yes. I understand. Being with you is creating a wonderful sensation within me. One I have never before experienced. One which I genuinely wish to explore more fully. However, if I reveal too much I fear you will not accept me."

Taniguchi smiled knowingly as he took and squeezed Nagato's hand. "I'm right there with you, Yuki. I know I'm acting pretty together and confident right now, but this thing is scaring the heck out of me. I'm totally afraid I'm going to fuck this up." He laughed. "But being with you feels great. It feels amazing. And I don't just mean the sex – which is incredible in its own right."

"Having sex with you was an accident. I was malfunction— … I was not in my right mind, under the influence of the virus."

"Huh?" Taniguchi frowned. "Does that mean…"

"I was in my right mind today at 12:08, however … and at 12:26 … and at—"

Taniguchi put up his free hand. "I got it. I got it." He started laughing. "I had no idea you were watching the clock."

Nagato squeezed his hand back. "Your technique is improving."

"Yours is too. I love that circle thing you did with your hips that last time. Did you read about that somewhere?"

Yuki nodded in the affirmative. "For our final position … did you?"

"Yes, I must admit I also did a little research before I came to pick you up. Pulled some of my old favorite tapes out of a box I had hidden in the attic. That thing I did with you pushed up against the wall with your left leg over your head …"

"I am a humanoid interface." Nagato interjected.

"Huh?"

"There exists an entity, a digital entity that can't communicate directly with human beings. I was created to act as an interface between this entity and certain residents of this planet."

"So you're an alien robot, huh?" Taniguchi chuckled. "I guess that explains your flexibility."

"I am not a robot. I am a hybrid, both human and digital."

"You know Kyon told me that you were really into science fiction. But I'm impressed at how you were able to maintain a straight face through all that."

"If what I told you was true, would you still accept me?"

Taniguchi thought about it for a minute. He put his arm around his date. "You're body feels nice and soft and warm right now. And I think it looks fantastic. I enjoy being with you and talking to you. And I can sort of tell that you like me, too."

"I do."

"I saw this movie once. Part of it was about this woman who was a god but she managed to live with this regular human and there weren't any problems. Until, of course, her regular guy, another god, showed up. But even then, after the mortal guy knew his wife had all these god powers, they still wanted to stay together." Taniguchi shrugged his shoulders. "If that were the case with us, where you're a god and I'm a mortal, I'm sure we could work it out."

"I see."

"Can you show me some of your alien powers?"

"I would prefer not to."

Taniguchi held out his palms as if he were checking for rain. "Well, that solves everything then. For all practical purposes you're my girlfriend. A girlfriend who reads a ton of sci-fi and has an awesome imagination. An imagination she likes to exercise now and then. I'm totally fine with that."

The train slowed as it approached the next station. "One more stop and we're there," Taniguchi said. The two watched as one fifth of the passengers jumped off the car, most to be replaced by fresh faces. The train began to accelerate once again.

"You don't believe me?" Nagato asked.

"No, of course not." Taniguchi noted Nagato's small frown. "Be honest, Yuki. Has any human you've shared this information with ever believed you?"

"No."

"Okay then, Miss Alien Interface. Answer me this. Have you ever talked to Martians? Or have you ever visited the planet Zork?" Taniguchi asked with a smug smile.

"No. There is no sentient life on Mars. And though I have never visited Zork, we utilize some of their technology. The Zork Emitter is a very versatile device."

Taniguchi let out a laugh. Then he put his arm around his date and gently pulled her closer. Nagato rested her head on Taniguchi's shoulder.

* * *

The train entered a tunnel that ran directly beneath the Nakamichi Mall. Taniguchi and Nagato stepped off at the lower level train station and walked toward the escalators. "I really don't know which clothing shops are the best, but I know a great way to find out," Taniguchi said as the two gained altitude on the motorized steps.

Upon reaching the main floor, the two exited the escalator and walked toward the middle of the mall. Weekend shoppers packed the place, strolling by in every direction. Taniguchi scanned the area for about a minute. "There," he said with his finger extended. "Those two girls _definitely_ know how to dress." He took Nagato's hand and led her toward the smartly attired pair; who were laughing and giggling, full paper shopping bags filled with garments in their hands, a spring in their gait.

"It's amazing the stuff you can get away with when you're a couple," Taniguchi said as they approached the two beauties. "Normally a stunt like this would earn me a punch in the nose."

"Excuse me miss!" Taniguchi smiled warmly at the taller of the two girls. "We're not from this part of town." The two took inventory of the young man and the smaller girl standing next to him, and waited patiently for him to continue. "We couldn't help but notice how nice the two of you looked and we were wondering if you could guide us to the best place to shop for clothes around here."

"Well, there's a ton of good stores in this mall," the taller girl answered. "Kimachi's is having a really good sale on jeans." The other girl was still sizing them up with a curious expression.

Taniguchi stepped behind Nagato and put his hands on her shoulders. "You're wondering about the school uniform, aren't you? My girlfriend lost all of her clothes in a freak washing machine accident yesterday. Her sister got lice and Yuki here had to wash everything she had because they share a closet. Somehow a felt tip pen got stuck in the washer's water hose and everything she owned got ruined. All she's got left is this uniform."

The girls nodded while Nagato stood still.

"Yuki is sort of shy and, you know, conservative, even though I think she's beautiful. 'It's fate!' I told her. 'And this accident is fate's way of telling you it's time to try a new look!'"

The two girls giggled when Nagato hugged herself and looked up at them with pensive eyes.

"She _is_ really cute," the shorter girl said to the taller. "What do you think, Kari?"

Kari nodded, looked down, and asked, "Did you bring your credit card, Yuki?"

Yuki nodded.

"I'm Kari," she pointed to her friend, "and this is Mina. Do you want to have some fun with us?"

Without hesitation, Yuki nodded again, almost enthusiastically.

The two girls looked at each other, happy-devious smiles lighting up their faces. Kari and Mina bumped fists and together shouted, "EXTREME MAKEOVER TIME!"

Mina took Yuki's right hand and Kari took her left. The trio rapidly walked away from Taniguchi as if he didn't exist.

"First stop," Kari barked like a soldier on a mission, "Belladonna's Beauty Salon!"

"Woo hoo!" added an equally jazzed Mina.

Taniguchi followed silently behind.

* * *

**A/N: For those curious, the movie Taniguchi was referring to about a god living with a mortal was "Hancock". I know the gods regularly got it on with mortal women back in the day - Zeus really liked to spread his divine seed around - but "Hancock" has always been one of my favorite movies about the "gods". - Al Ling  
**


	4. Extreme Makeover

.

**Chapter 4: Extreme Makeover**

* * *

Taniguchi peered over the fifth level balcony. The water shimmering in the ground floor fountain pool looked tempting. He fished around inside his jeans pocket for a coin, certain that with the right spin he could splash it from where he stood.

He retrieved the perfect wishing coin, a 25 Yen piece, but decided against tossing it after noticing an overhead security camera, its remotely controlled lens turning to get a fix on him. Obviously he wasn't the first person to consider making a good luck toss from five stories up.

He smiled to himself and sighed, "Heck. Who needs it?" After all, how much luckier could he get at this point? A successful splash from this distance might even turn fortune against him.

Taniguchi waved at the camera, pocketed the coin, and checked his watch. "Damn." Only 44 minutes had elapsed since Mina's polite suggestion that he go take a walk for "a little while".

"I guarantee that you won't recognize this girl when we're done with her," Kari had added, her protective arm wrapped around Yuki's shoulders.

"I will text you," his considerate girlfriend had said, moments before Kari and Mina whisked her off into the secret recesses of Belladonna's Beauty Boutique. (No, it wasn't a Salon. But did that really matter?)

Taniguchi groaned, "Now I know how a groom feels on his wedding day." He chuckled and forced the image from his mind. "Not so fast, dude, not so fast," he told himself. "Keep it together. Don't start fantasizing about marriage yet. Let's make it through this date first."

"EXTREME MAKEOVER TIME!" the beauty consultants had shouted. It was the last thing he expected to happen. But he was pleased with how things worked out. It'll be good for Yuki to get out of her comfort zone. _"That's what relationships are about. They force you to stretch, to expand your horizons…"_ And Yuki had accepted the girls' offer quickly enough.

Taniguchi's next time wasting stop was the Apple Store. He strolled past the newest iPods and iPhones and iPads, and wondered if his girlfriend's fictitious, technologically advanced, home world had gadgets as cool as these. Only 50,000 Yen for an iPad Air. Taniguchi patted his pocket. No, he would not be purchasing one today.

Taniguchi wasn't too concerned about Yuki's credit card tab for this outing. Though he had no idea what her new look and clothes were going to cost, his new girlfriend seemed like a person with resources. The ritzy apartment complex she lived in was the first giveaway. And though her furnishings were Spartan, what little she did have was top of the line.

The Kinokuniya Bookstore was where Taniguchi finally lost himself. As he perused the store's impressive manga and science fiction sections, time seemed to fly; to the point where he was startled when his phone finally alerted him of an incoming text message. He fumbled for his smart phone and held it to his eyes, dropping the book he was sampling in the process.

"_Katsura Photo Studio, Level 3."_

Taniguchi's heart rate instantly tripled. He picked up the book and slammed it down on top of the shelf before jogging for the door – but caught himself five steps later. He didn't want to look like a shoplifter. Taniguchi took several deep breaths, slowly regained his composure, and left the store like a calm person; then broke into a sprint once he was a safe distance from the entrance doors.

Navigating the escalators down two levels was slow going. People thwarted his forward motion at every possible turn; he was tempted to jump over the side. After some patient hopping in place he was finally able to step out onto level 3. Having no idea where this photo studio was, he darted toward the mall map and ran his finger along the little blocks representing stores. "Found it! East wing!" He resumed his sprint.

Three hundred yards later, Taniguchi slowed to a walk as he approached the photo studio. He was breathing hard due either to the work out or his excitement – he wasn't sure which.

Mina greeted him at the door. "Hey there cowboy," the beauty said with a sly smile. "I think you're really going to like what we did with your girlfriend. We're in Studio 3." He followed her down the hall through the open door with a large yellow "3" painted on it.

What Taniguchi saw next nearly stopped his heart. There, lit up by the studio lights, posing before a seamless white backdrop, stood a truly stunning model. Though small in stature, the girl's presence lit up the room.

"That's perfect!" the photographer said as the model shifted effortlessly from one pose to the next.

"No way!" Taniguchi said as he took in the view. A tight black leather skirt hugged Yuki's hips while a tighter red v-neck top hugged her chest, revealing the sides of her breasts and accentuating their perfect shape. Three inch heels completed the outfit, lengthening Yuki's shapely legs. Through the magic of makeup, Yuki's otherwise plain but pretty face had been transformed into that of an idol; large eyes, full lips, high pronounced cheekbones. Taniguchi watched Yuki Nagato work the camera with his mouth open.

Mina giggled. "Isn't she great? You'd think she's been doing this all her life."

"She really is amazing," Kari said. She pointed to the photographer. "Kenko gave her a quick lesson on posing, then he showed her some samples, and Yuki just took off with it. She acts like she's been modeling for years."

Mina nodded. "She doesn't smile a lot, but the sexy look she's giving the camera is making even me want to -"

Kari put her hand over her friend's mouth and gave her a quick evil glare.

A mesmerized Taniguchi didn't even notice. "That outfit …" Taniguchi managed to say. "And her face ... Wow! I barely recognize her!"

"Not bad at all, huh?" Kari agreed. Taniguchi looked over at the taller girl, not that much taller than Yuki now, and realized that when it came to beauty, all three of these girls were now in the same league – and way out of his.

"Take five!" yelled the photographer before setting down his camera.

Yuki nodded, then stepped forward toward her boyfriend and did a quick spin with her arms overhead. "Do you like my outfit?" she asked with a small pleased smile.

Taniguchi was speechless.

* * *

"Thanks for letting us borrow your girlfriend," Kari said over her shoulder as the four walked through the mall – three hot princesses in the lead with their manservant Taniguchi following several paces behind, carrying several large paper bags stuffed with fashion in each hand.

Taniguchi was amazed by the attention the girls garnered as they strolled through the crowds, not just from the men but from some women, too. Taniguchi chuckled when he recalled that only hours ago he was one of those gawking appreciative men - he hadn't approached Kari and Mina because he appreciated their personalities.

Taniguchi felt a twinge of anger when one guy's roving eyes landed and fixed on Yuki a bit too long. When this guy whistled, Taniguchi's first inclination was to punch this jerk in the face. He quickly thought better of it though, remembering the countless times he'd been the whistler.

"You'll get used to it," Mina told Yuki. "Just ignore that loser."

"It's not so bad," Kari added. "Just don't let it go to your head. Being pretty is like having a lot of money. You can never tell whether someone likes you for who you are or for what you've got."

"And you've definitely _got_ it, sister." Mina put her arm around Yuki's shoulder.

"So be careful."

"I will," Yuki replied. "Thank you both for your help."

"It was _our_ pleasure!" the girls accidentally replied in unison.

"Our train arrives in five," Kira said. "So we've gotta be going. Thanks for hanging out with us Yuki. It was a blast. You need anything, you call us." The two girls gave Yuki a quick hug. Kari and Mina turned to Taniguchi and retrieved their bags from his collection.

"Thanks for carrying these." Mina winked at him. "You take good care of this girl!" She waved as the two disappeared down an escalator.

Walking along in his plain jeans and knit shirt, Taniguchi felt strangely out of his element. The glances Yuki attracted from male appreciators didn't abate. In fact, they seemed to increase. Taniguchi was certain one group of guys had turned to follow them just so they could watch Yuki's sexy walk in that tight skirt - heck, it was what he would have done!

"Well, it looks like you've got some stuff to stock your closets." Taniguchi patted his pocket. "And I still haven't bought anything for you. Would you like to stop somewhere for dinner maybe? Before we head home?"

Nagato took her boyfriend's hand and squeezed it. "I would prefer to go home now."


	5. Further Examinations

.

**Chapter 5: Further Examinations**

* * *

Taniguchi and Nagato sat cross-legged on the floor of Nagato's living room. Several half-full bowls of Chinese food topped the small wooden tea table separating them.

Taniguchi popped a piece of sweet and sour chicken into his mouth. "This food is great." He picked up a rice box and read the label. "The Ling Chong Chinese Restaurant. You know I've lived in this city for eighteen years and I never thought to try that place."

Yuki set down her chopsticks. "I eat their take-out regularly. It is my favorite." She extended her arm out to the side and pulled down on the fabric of her baggy gray cotton sweat shirt. "Thank you again for the new outfit. It is very comfortable."

Taniguchi inspected Yuki, starting at the white cotton tube socks peeking out of her matching gray sweat pants and ending at her freshly washed face. "You know you really looked hot in that skirt and top. But it was pretty obvious you didn't feel too comfortable in that getup. I had a feeling you wouldn't mind a quick detour to Old Navy before we hit the train." Taniguchi took another bite of food. "How did it feel to get so much attention, though?"

Yuki tilted her head and recollected the experience. "On one level it felt quite good. The attention made me feel … special. However I am enjoying myself much more, at this moment, with you," she ran her hand over her leg, "dressed like this."

"You were amazing in front of that camera. When will you get those pictures?"

"The studio will make thumbnail images available to me online by tomorrow at 5PM. I can then order full sized prints. We took several group shots and I am curious at how they turned out."

"You mean you with the girls?" Taniguchi asked. Yuki nodded. "What was it like hanging out with Kari and Mina?"

"They were very knowledgeable and very helpful. I enjoyed myself … immensely."

"They seemed to be having a really good time as well." Taniguchi chuckled. "You've always seemed like such a reserved person to me. How in the world did they manage to talk you into getting dressed up and modeling like that?"

"It was simple." Yuki took several bites from her plate. "I asked them to make me look attractive … to you. Then I followed their instructions."

Taniguchi laughed out loud. "Well, they certainly succeeded. I hope you'll let me see more of your new clothes. Though I must admit that I'm really liking hanging out with you like this, too." He took a sip of his tea. "You know, while you were getting your makeover I spent most of my time in the book store, in the science fiction section, and I had some time to think about what you were telling me… about the sci-fi fantasies you shared with me on the train and the role play you like to do and all that."

Yuki looked up and nodded.

"And I want to role play, too. If that's okay with you." Yuki did not respond. "Because I was thinking back to our first time, you know … together … in the Nurse's Office, and about how I was able to help you with your virus by giving you my fluids. I have to admit, that was pretty weird. I mean, you went from really sick to perfectly healthy in almost zero seconds flat." Taniguchi patted his private area and winked. "I know I'm a pretty potent guy, but still. How is that possible?"

"The virus was largely digital in nature. Once the digital threat was neutralized, my human immune system easily wiped out the residue."

"Sure it did. But my question is, how did I get that virus in the first place so I could help you? And why didn't it affect me?"

"You contracted it from Ryoko Asakura's vomit. Like me, and unlike you, she is a humanoid interface and her connection to the Data Integration Thought Entity made her equally susceptible to its influence."

"Is she still sick?"

"The virus was completely eradicated from the host system 12.45 hours ago. She should be fine now."

"Do you think the virus changed her in any way? Like it changed you?"

"The virus did not change me."

"I'll be honest, Yuki. I've had my eye on you for a long time. I've always thought you were a very pretty girl. But after you left the Nurse's Office that day I dumped a glass of cold water on my head to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. What you did in there was the absolute last thing I expected from you. That was not the _you_ that I thought I knew at all."

"I…" Yuki stopped and considered Taniguchi's words.

"You're the first girl that's ever asked me to put my cock in her mouth," Taniguchi raised his eyebrows, "and then in her butt … and then in her pussy. And you're still pretty much that same girl. You're just not passing out into my arms as much."

Yuki gave Taniguchi a perplexed look. "Which version of me do you prefer?"

"No Yuki! Don't misunderstand me. I like both versions of you. You're _not_ not you. Wait. I know that didn't make any sense. I mean I like _both_ versions of you, but I'm a guy, okay? And I'd be lying if I told you I didn't like the version of you that likes to fuck my brains out every chance she gets! It's not something I was expecting from you, but it's something I really appreciate. I'm kinda glad for what this virus did to your digital circuits."

Yuki crossed her arms and tilted her head up. She looked at the ceiling as she once again considered Taniguchi's words. Then she looked into his eyes. "I approve of the way the virus changed me as well. Though I've always been part of the Data Integration Thought Entity, it does not compare with the feeling of completeness I feel when I'm with you… especially when you're deep inside me. I know this is a uniquely human sensation. I believe the virus temporarily severed my connection with the collective and forced me to become more human."

Taniguchi smiled. "Okay, Miss Sci-fi Junky. _That_ was an awesome story. This is really fun." He shook his head. Then his eyes widened with an epiphany. Jumping back into character, he said, "Hey, if Miss Asakura got sick from the same virus you had, and she's like you, won't it change her, too?"

"I do not know what effect it will have on her." Yuki looked down and squeezed her recently self-enhanced breasts together through her sweatshirt. "A thorough examination may be in order."

Taniguchi shot Yuki a sly smile. He bent forward and ran his hand over Yuki's knee. "I totally agree. It's definitely examination time."

"I meant a thorough examination of Ryoko Asakura. Not an examination of me."

Taniguchi nodded and held out his hand. "Please hand over those sweat pants, Miss Nagato."

"But they're mine."

"Yes they are." Taniguchi started moving the items from the tea table and set them on the tile floor. "And you'll get them back … after my examination. You know I haven't properly taken your temperature since we've started dating."

Yuki returned a small happy smile. "Yes doctor. I understand." She removed her sweat pants – she wore nothing underneath – and handed them to her boyfriend. After lubricating his penis with her saliva, the kneeling girl turned, bent forward, and rested her elbows on the edge of the table while arching her back. She moaned contentedly as Dr. Taniguchi slowly pushed his thermometer deep into her ass.

As Taniguchi moved in and out of his girlfriend, the image of a stunning Yuki Nagato modeling her new clothes popped into his mind. That girl was hot! Then he looked down at his current Yuki - face clean, wearing only socks and a sweatshirt - and thought to himself how perfectly adequate her current outfit seemed to be as well. He bent forward and reached underneath Yuki's top to cup her full dangling breasts with his hands. Yuki sighed agreeably.

Though Yuki did not request a temperature analysis, Taniguchi chuckled when his imagination provided one moments before he emptied himself into his partner. Had she asked about her temperature, Taniguchi would have told her …

Everything was perfect.

* * *

Meanwhile, three apartments over and two stories down, Ryoko Asakura stumbled out of bed. The Data Integration Thought Entity had finally managed to eradicate the virus from its system and had reset its operations earlier that day. Still Ryoko Asakura felt oddly different and had remained in bed for several more hours. When nothing changed, she accepted the fact that no amount of bed rest was going to change this uncomfortable new sensation.

For some unknown reason, Ryoko felt the urge to walk over to her bathroom mirror and look at herself. Though her consciousness had existed for quite some time within the digital entity, her hybrid body was still relatively new to her; it served its purpose and she rarely gave it much thought. But for more than three days, all that changed. For 76.54 hours, while the entity focused all its energy on eradicating the unwelcome digital intruder, her human body _was all she was_.

Ryoko had often marveled at the capabilities of her humanoid interface body when compared to the incredibly limited capabilities of a normal human female's body. She'd concluded early on that humans were a puny and helpless lot. But after spending three days essentially disconnected from the depleted data entity, Ryoko had no choice but to engage and fully experience her human side.

And it certainly felt strange. But it also felt strangely nice – in a way she couldn't fully, or even partly, fathom.

Ryoko unbuttoned her pink pajama top and let it slip off over her shoulders. Then she stepped out of her pants. She stood in front of the mirror and carefully studied herself; her breasts, her arms, her hips, her legs. Suddenly her face flushed a deep scarlet red … on its own! She'd never realized how amazingly beautiful the body she'd been assigned was and the involuntary reaction she had to it now shocked her. She turned and faced the wall for a few seconds, attempting to process the unexpected response. But in her mind confusion reigned.

She slowly turned back toward her reflection. Then, after taking a deep breath, Ryoko let her body go, allowing it to do what it _felt_ like doing. As if they were magically directed, her left hand moved to cup her right breast while her right hand crept down past her belly and between her legs. As her left hand fondled and pinched her soft sensitive globes, two fingers of her right hand slipped into her vagina. Ryoko was surprised at how slick and slippery her vagina was. She slid her slick moist fingers over her clitoris, and rubbed it with a firm circular motion.

"Oh my!" she gasped when the shock of the pleasure sensations the rubbing generated registered in her system. This human female body, a vessel which she once considered nothing more than a vehicle for her digital consciousness, was amazingly and pleasingly sensitive to her touch. Ryoko continued rubbing her clitoris, studying the crazy expressions that crossed her face as she did. Several times she asked herself, who was this silly person in the mirror? It certainly wasn't anybody she knew.

As her circular ministrations intensified, Ryoko's entire body started feeling better, and better, and better, and better in the most indescribable way. She put her left hand down on the counter to steady herself as a wave of bliss radiated out from her core and rocked her body.

Undaunted, she continued rubbing herself. More waves followed. Waves so intense that standing up was becoming difficult.

"Oh … my!" Suppressing her vocal emanations was impossible. "OHHHHHHH MY!" she screamed when she hit her peak.

The moaning, panting girl continued the self-stimulation until the intensity of the waves eventually receded. After taking a minute to catch her breath, Ryoko straightened up and collected herself.

"Wow," she sighed softly, followed by a wide smile and a giggle. "Maybe there's more to this girl thing than I thought."


	6. Ryoko's Epiphany

.

**Chapter 6:** **Ryoko's Epiphany  
**

* * *

Ryoko Asakura walked into home room with a smile on her face and a hop in her step. The virus had put her down for several days, but now she felt as good as gold. It was time to get back to work. Several classmates waved their greetings as their home room president strolled about the classroom. Ryoko checked the chalkboards (yes, they were clean and stocked with an adequate amount of chalk), the garbage cans (yes, they had been emptied), and the floor (yes, it had been swept). Ryoko was pleased to see that in her absence everyone had done their chores.

As she strolled down the aisle of desks adjacent to the classroom's squeaky clean windows, Ryoko noticed Haruhi Suzumiya staring through the glass toward the horizon. Such an intense gaze; Ryoko wondered what the girl was thinking about. Kyon hadn't arrived yet so the seat in front of Haruhi was vacant. Though she hadn't had much success communicating with the moody girl in the past, Ryoko felt inspired to start a conversation once again. It seemed a productive way for the classroom's leader to pass the scant few minutes before studies commenced.

Haruhi Suzumiya didn't seem to notice Ryoko's approach; she was in another world, deep in thought.

As Ryoko closed in on her meditating classmate, to Ryoko's surprise her autonomic nervous system started kicking in; her heart and breathing rates were steadily increasing with every step she took. Ryoko touched her cheek; her face also felt warmer.

Ryoko stopped and smiled as the unexpected reaction triggered pleasant memories of her masturbation session at her mirror two days ago - as well as the many sessions that followed that one. _But why was her body doing this?  
_

She resumed her stroll. Ryoko's pupils dilated and she involuntarily blinked several times as her eyes registered Haruhi's shapely legs, sexily crossed, her heel hypnotically swinging back and forth, her toe tapping the desk leg. She followed the curve of Haruhi's legs to her firm bottom; then up to her arched, twisted back, marveling at the way the pose forced Haruhi's breasts forward into her tight blouse. It was a view she'd seen countless times. Nothing was different.

But now, for some reason, _everything was different._

Ryoko sensed her hand's request to switch to autopilot; her fingertips were tingling. Though she instructed her fingers to wait, a powerful desire within longed to touch those perfect breasts. Ryoko silently stood over the girl and marveled at the pleasing alignment of Haruhi's strong shoulders and her thick brown hair, appreciating also for the first time the elegance of the trademark yellow ribbon keeping Haruhi's luscious mane in place.

"You are _so_ beautiful," Ryoko said softly with a look of awe, her hand absentmindedly brushing the soft warm skin of Haruhi's arm.

"What?" Haruhi snapped around in response to the touch and looked up at the girl with an annoyed glare. "What do you want?" It immediately knocked Ryoko out of her trance.

"I ... was just thinking about how beautifully that yellow ribbon accents your hair and frames your face." Ryoko sat down in Kyon's chair and continued the conversation. "I never realized how spectacular you looked. I mean … how spectacular that hair ribbon looks on you tied just that way."

"Huh?" Haruhi shot Ryoko a semi-concerned semi-bewildered look. "Are you feeling okay, Asakura? I know you've been out a few days."

Ryoko could feel her cheeks flushing an even brighter shade of red. "To be honest, I feel a little light headed right now. I'm not exactly sure why. I hope you don't mind if I sit down."

Haruhi nodded, then twisted the end of the yellow ribbon around in her finger. "You can get these anywhere." She scanned Ryoko's long locks. "But yellow's not your color. I think a blue ribbon would suit you better."

Ryoko leaned forward with large expectant eyes. "Could we go shopping together sometime, Miss Suzumiya?"

Haruhi gave the home room president one final perplexed look … before turning back to the window without a reply.

"Hey," spoke a voice from behind. "I think you're in my seat." Ryoko turned to see Kyon standing over her.

When Haruhi turned toward Kyon's voice, Ryoko registered the girl's imperceptibly quick _sincere_ happy glance, followed immediately by a prolonged _faked_ look of resigned acceptance.

The three second interchange shouldn't have been remarkable, yet Ryoko felt a unpleasant jolt of anger surge through her body like an electric shock. _What was that?_

A confused Ryoko Asakura stood up and with a practiced fake smile of her own strolled away, though she kept her ears focused on their banter.

"Did you make it home okay yesterday?" she heard Kyon ask the girl.

"I'm here, aren't I?" Haruhi snapped; though Ryoko knew she was merely feigning annoyance. "So I guess you can safely deduce that my train got me home without a hitch."

"That's not necessarily true," Kyon replied with a much cheerier tone. "Your train could have derailed and you could have been forced to walk home." He continued to bait her. "Or the paramedics could have made you take an ambulance to the hospital, from where you got released this morning, just in time for school."

"Idiot!" Haruhi replied, though Ryoko could hear the smile in her voice.

Now at her own desk near the front of the room, the couple's conversation was out of ear shot, blending with the chatter of her fellow classmates.

Though the conversation disappeared into the background, Ryoko's anger did not.

Ryoko didn't have a clue why.

* * *

For the next two class periods, Ryoko Asakura couldn't concentrate on a single thing the teacher was saying. All she could think about was the girl sitting in the back of the classroom next to the window. Ryoko wondered why she was suddenly so stirred by this person. After all, they'd been classmates for quite some time and she'd always felt fine around Miss Suzumiya.

But that was the past, and what did the past matter? Ryoko was struggling to maintain control of herself _right now!_ These unfamiliar emotions were overwhelming her!

After sixty grueling minutes the bell rang signaling that class had finally ended. P.E. class was next. Ryoko looked around the room. As was often the case, some of the guys took their time getting their books together. It wasn't because they were lazy. It was because there was always that chance that something very interesting might happen.

Ryoko swung around in her seat and scanned the back of the classroom. Kyon was gone, off to an even-numbered classroom to change. And Haruhi was at her desk, removing her socks and shoes. Normally Ryoko would clear the male stragglers out of the classroom at this point. The minute or two Haruhi took to bare her feet was always more than adequate for this purpose. It was a silent signal from the exhibitionist to the traditionalist that it was time to get the boys out; it had wordlessly become their compromise.

However, today Ryoko decided to wait, pretending to be busy arranging some items in her backpack.

"Allllll-right!" one of the guys said, as Haruhi removed her blouse and set it on her desk.

"EVERYBODY OUT!" shouted Ryoko Asakura, as she had so often done in the past. "RIGHT NOW!"

The lingering guys groaned. They knew the drill. But today they left satisfied, because today their loitering had paid off. Today they'd been able to view a beautiful girl with her top off.

Haruhi didn't care. Her blouse was off and she was working on undoing the belt of her skirt. The door closed seconds before that piece of clothing hit the floor.

"I need _everybody_ out this time," Ryoko said authoritatively, addressing the girls. "I need to have a private talk with Miss Suzumiya."

The girls gave the home room president understanding nods as they left the classroom. Yes, it was time to educate Haruhi Suzumiya on some of the finer points of classroom etiquette. This sort of behavior could no longer be tolerated. Someone needed to give Haruhi Suzumiya a good tongue-lashing.

Thirty seconds later, after the last girl left the classroom, Ryoko locked the door and drew the blinds. Haruhi Suzumiya, defiantly standing by her desk in her bra and panties, put her hands on her hips. She shot Ryoko a disdainful stare.

"Miss Suzumiya," Ryoko started, "I would like to talk to you for a few minutes." As she approached the gorgeous, nearly naked girl, her heart started racing again. "I have a question… Are you aware of the effect that your body has on others?"

"I'm not hurting anybody," Haruhi replied with a shrug of her shoulders. "I've got bikinis that reveal more than what I'm wearing now. I don't know why you think it's such a big deal."

"I'm told that for a man, it's different," Ryoko replied. "You're showing of things that are normally not shown. To these guys, it's as if you were naked."

Haruhi crossed her arms over her chest. "No it's not! That's crazy!"

Ryoko rapidly stepped forward, startling Haruhi. As Haruhi blinked, Ryoko reached around her back, undid her bra clasp, and pulled the garment forward into her hands. When Haruhi's eyes opened, her jaw dropped down in amazement. Ryoko held the bra up near Haruhi's face and shook it like a rattle. When Haruhi blinked again, Ryoko knelt down, deftly pulled Haruhi Suzumiya's panties down to her ankles, and stood back up. Haruhi Suzumiya's look of amazement morphed into one of stunned shock.

"This is how you look to these guys," Ryoko said, dropping the bra on Haruhi's seat. "How does it feel?"

Haruhi recovered quickly. She wasn't backing down. The nude girl looked into Ryoko's eyes, stepped out of her panties, and laid them on top of her bra. "It doesn't bother me a bit." Haruhi crossed her arms over her breasts. "And I still don't see why it should bother anybody else."

"Come now." Ryoko took Haruhi's hands and moved them to her sides, uncovering her chest. Ryoko started fondling Haruhi's full perfect globes. "Don't you want all the guys to see these?"

"What the hell?" Haruhi said with wide eyes as Ryoko's fingers continued massaging her breasts. "What are you doing?"

"Please just relax," Ryoko replied, her voice conveying a hint of authority. "I need you to understand my point."

Though Haruhi's eyes continued to register shock, she paused to understand Ryoko's "point". In addition, she found what was happening to her exceedingly _interesting _for some reason; totally out of the norm_ - _and it felt so very, very good.

Ryoko accessed the vivid memories of the self-stimulation sessions associated with her breasts. Though the mirror's reflection had been replaced by her classmate's equally gorgeous breasts, Ryoko was confident everything worked the same. Except ... Ryoko suddenly realized she had another tool in her arsenal, one that had not been available before. Haruhi moaned involuntarily when Ryoko started teasing her areolas and hardening nipples with her tongue and lips.

While maintaining her focus on the naked girl's sensitive breasts, Ryoko gently guided Haruhi toward her desk, stopping when the girl's firm bare bottom touched its edge. "Please lay back for me," Ryoko whispered.

"What are you …" Haruhi started to say, as she let Ryoko help her recline back onto her desk. With her head near the window and her bum at the desk's opposite edge, Haruhi didn't resist when Ryoko raised and opened her legs wide.

"I think … you're the most beautiful … girl … in the world," Ryoko said, the words separated by soft kisses on Haruhi's chest and belly. Haruhi looked on helplessly as Ryoko's tongue glided down toward her vagina.

Haruhi's eyes went wide with bewilderment and shock when Ryoko started giving the rebellious girl the tongue-lashing she deserved. Again Ryoko applied the knowledge she'd gained from her weekend of experimentation, and was pleased when the nude girl's moans and shivers signaled that Haruhi's autonomic nervous system had begun to kick in as well.

For a moment, Haruhi's head peeked out of the fog of pleasure when a jolt of bliss rocked her body. "Wait … this is wrong," Haruhi protested. "So … so … wrong!" Then Haruhi gasped for air and crossed her ankles behind Ryoko's back. "Stop it … oh … Ryoko … please … stop it," Haruhi sighed, her hands gripping the side of the desk to keep her planted in the moment. "No … more … please…"

Ryoko giggled and continued her oral stimulation of the naked girl's engorged clitoris and surrounding areas. She loved the way Haruhi Suzumiya trembled beneath her. It seemed as if the defiant naked girl had been reduced to little more than a musical instrument, an instrument that Ryoko was skillfully playing toward an impressive crescendo. She sensed Haruhi was rushing toward the same wonderful precipice Ryoko had become so familiar with over the weekend.

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" Haruhi screamed, as an devastating orgasm rocked her to the core. "OOOOOOHHHHHHH!" She pulled Ryoko closer with her powerful legs. "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Haruhi was convulsing with pleasure, shaking the desk as she came. The building seemed to be shifting on its foundation beneath her.

Ryoko continued the tongue-lashing past her peak, making sure to coax every last spasm of pleasure out of the gasping girl's body. Finally Ryoko could feel Haruhi's muscles relaxing; the nude girl pulled her legs up to the edge of the desk and let them butterfly wide open to the sides.

Ryoko stepped back from the exhausted girl who, after several minutes of panting, did her best to sit up.

Haruhi gave Ryoko a befuddled look. "Why did you do that to me? I mean, how could you? … I'm not a lesbian." Haruhi hugged herself tightly, then whispered, "At least I don't think so." Haruhi got up off the desk and covered herself, her left arm over her breasts, her right hand over her vagina. She looked down at the pile of clothes at her feet, then up at Ryoko. "Why did you do that?"

Ryoko thoughtfully considered her question for a few moments. "I think I did it," a surprised Ryoko finally replied with a tiny shrug and a sweet sincere smile, "because I love you."

Haruhi, now in full control of her senses, shook her head angrily while pointing her index finger at Ryoko's chest. "You had no right to do that to me … You stupid bitch!"

Haruhi pulled her extended finger way back into a fist and slugged Ryoko in the jaw with it as hard as she could.

* * *

Haruhi Suzumiya was the first girl to leave the classroom, fully dressed for P.E. in her tight blue shorts and North High t-shirt. The rest of the girls, who were patiently waiting for Ryoko to complete her tongue-lashing, looked away as the recently disciplined girl passed them with a flushed, teary-eyed face.

When the girls entered the room, they were surprised to find Ryoko Asakura, sprawled out on the floor in the aisle next to Haruhi Suzumiya's desk unconscious. One of the girls tried to rouse her. "What happened?" she asked.  
"She didn't take your correction very well, did she?" another asked.  
"It looked like Miss Suzumiya was crying," another added softly.

Ryoko sat up with a pleased smile on her face. "Oh no," she giggled. "Though I did chew her out pretty good, Miss Suzumiya seemed to take it quite well." She rubbed the bruise on her jaw. "Unfortunately as Miss Suzumiya was leaving, I tripped on her school clothes and hit my head on the side of a desk. Don't be alarmed, it was just my clumsiness. I'm still a little weak from my illness." She took a deep breath and shouted, "Let's all get ready for class!"

All the girls bought Ryoko's excuse and nodded. They helped her to her feet, then walked over to their desks and started dressing for P.E. class.

After Ryoko removed her blouse and shimmied out of her skirt, she touched her jaw again. She decided not to let it rapid-heal, choosing instead to keep the bruise as a souvenir; a trophy she'd admire during tonight's mirror session.

Ryoko Asakura and Haruhi Suzumiya...

A pleasing sensation of warmth radiated out from her core as Ryoko pictured the two _together_. The mirror would shatter as another beauty stepped in to replace Ryoko's reflection. If only this beauty could see her destiny as clearly as Ryoko could.

Unfortunately a pesky small cloud blocked Haruhi Suzumiya's view of paradise. The cloud's name was Kyon.


	7. An Anoymous Note

.

**Chapter 7: An Anonymous Note**

* * *

Once again Kyon, Kunikida and Taniguchi sat on the bleachers facing the running track. Today their P.E. instructor had demanded ten laps instead of the standard eight. Still the three were able to complete their laps with ample time to spare before they'd need to head back to the classroom.

"How's Nagato?" Kyon asked Taniguchi.

Taniguchi nodded and smiled. "She's doing very well. We had a great time together this past weekend. Things are really starting to click."

Kunikida turned to Kyon and said, "When he gets back to class, make Taniguchi show you the pictures he's got of Nagato on his smart phone. They went to one of those photo shoot studio places where girls go to show off their new clothes and makeup. I gotta admit it, Nagato totally looks like an idol!"

Taniguchi nodded. "It's true. Mix in a tight skirt, sexy top, and a little bit of makeup and Yuki looks just as hot as Miss Asakura."

Kunikida frowned. "Especially now that Asakura got that big ugly bruise on her chin. What's up with that?"

"I overheard some girls saying Suzumiya slugged her after Asakura tried to set her straight about undressing while there were still guys in the room," said Kyon. "They said she knocked her out cold." He chuckled. "I don't know if that's true, but I wouldn't put it past her."

"It's possible," said Kunikida. "Tomikata told me he hung around after the bell and got an eyeful of Suzumiya without her blouse on before Asakura shooed him away."

Taniguchi pointed to the far side of the sports field, past the adjacent soccer fields, at a girl with a yellow ribbon in her hair sitting alone in the far corner. "Suzumiya's been sitting out there on her own the whole class."

The guys watched from a distance as a lone figure slowly approached Haruhi Suzumiya from the track; Ryoko Asakura was walking toward her. As soon as Haruhi saw Ryoko approaching, she got up and ran off to the other side of the field. Ryoko turned and walked back to the track.

"Those two sure aren't getting along," Taniguchi remarked.

"Certainly not as well as you and Nagato seem to be," Kyon changed the subject. "Nagato doesn't seem at all strange or different to you?"

Taniguchi threw up his arms. "Dude. Everybody's got some kind of idiosyncrasy. I used to think Yuki was a little crazy with her science fiction outlook on everything, but now I understand it's just a role playing game she's in to, about her being part of this thought entity thingy and how she's half digital." He pointed to the field. "She says Asakura's part digital, too. It was a little strange at first, but now that I'm taking part in it, we're both having a great time role playing."

Kyon shook his head and laughed.

* * *

After changing back into his school uniform in the even-numbered classroom, Kyon walked next door to his desk. Haruhi was back, fully dressed for school, but with her head down in her arms on her desk. Kyon knew better than to disturb her while she was in this state.

Haruhi came to life only once that afternoon, and then only briefly, when Kunikida stopped by with Taniguchi's cell phone between classes to show him the hot photos of Yuki Nagato taken that weekend at the Nakamichi Mall.

When the bell sounded, signaling the end of the regular school day, Kyon turned back to talk to Haruhi. But she had already bolted out the door. No big deal. He'd see her in the club room, where he might even get the chance to ask her how she was feeling.

But first, Kyon had to make a stop at his shoe locker. When Kyon reached his locker, he noticed a white slip of paper sticking out of his left shoe. He picked up the note and read it.

_"After school has let out, meet me in the 1-5 classroom."_

That was odd. Why this anonymous note? Who would want to see him now? He turned the slip of paper over in his hand and studied the symbols. He didn't recognize the handwriting but sensed the writing was a girl's.

Kyon was intrigued, but first things first. He put on his walking shoes and made his way to the SOS Brigade club room. When he arrived, he was surprised to see the commander's desk vacant.

"Where's Haruhi?" Kyon asked Koizumi.

"She hasn't come in yet," he replied.

Kyon noticed Nagato wasn't at her seat either. She was probably out with Taniguchi. "Role play," he sighed to himself as he took his seat in front of the chess board. "Thank you," Kyon said more loudly when Mikuru Asahina poured Kyon a steaming hot cup of tea.

Seeing that he was white, Kyon moved his King's pawn forward two spaces. "Your move," he told Koizumi.

* * *

Yuki smiled when she called to mind the highlights of her weekend with Taniguchi - it was a strange sensation using face muscles she'd never used before. She could still feel his presence inside of her, even though he was currently at the other side of campus. There was no doubt about it. Taniguchi was correct. Yuki Nagato had changed.

And as rain followed thunder for everyone in town, it meant that Ryoko Asakura had probably changed, too. A thorough examination was in order; Yuki rubbed her bottom and giggled as the thought crossed her mind. When Yuki checked the real time stats of Asakura's data stream, she immediately picked up some anomalous activity. It was centered around classroom 1-5, as if Ryoko were annexing the data space for her own purposes. What in the world was going on over there?

To be safe, Yuki carefully hid several detonation elements in the data stream. And she kept a close watch on classroom 1-5.

* * *

Ryoko Asakura waited patiently in the darkened classroom; the overhead lights were off; everyone was gone. Ryoko walked over toward the windows (they were still squeaky clean), then to the back of the room where Haruhi Suzumiya sat. She ran her hand over the surface of Haruhi's desk, imagining that it felt warm; and it strengthened her resolve.

Kyon was not at fault. He was just an innocent bystander that got in the way. Ryoko giggled to herself. Things like this happened to humans every day. They died in police chases, during bank robberies, from natural disasters. The poor guy happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. It could have happened to anyone.

Ryoko checked the clock. _Why did the minutes seem to pass so slowly?_ The nature of time hadn't changed.

She heard a rattle! Someone was turning the doorknob. Ryoko's walked quickly toward the chalkboards at the front of the room as the door swung open.

* * *

Kyon stood in the hallway; his hand extended, grasping and twisting the doorknob.

Kyon had managed to clobber Koizumi in their chess match. He'd captured Koizumi's king in less than thirty minutes. However Haruhi had not shown up, and Kyon knew from experience that she'd most likely gone home without telling anyone. He wasn't surprised considering the girl's foul mood. _"I guess you can do that when you're the Brigade Leader,"_ Kyon surmised. That meant there was no reason for him to hang around in the club room. After all, he still had a mysterious appointment to keep.

And now he was keeping it.

Kyon slowly pushed the door to classroom 1-5 forward, curious to see who would be waiting for him inside. As he stepped through the door, Kyon perceived that the room was much darker than the brightly lit hallway; he blinked a few times to help his eyes adjust. It took a few moments before he could focus.

Then he saw her, standing by the chalkboard.

"Hey Nagato!" he shouted at the tiny short haired girl. "What are _you_ doing here?"

* * *

"I was really surprised when you walked through that door," Ryoko said with a smile and a giggle at the girl sitting next to her on the train seat. "I was actually under the impression that I'd offended you very deeply."

Haruhi turned to the apologetic girl. "I waited at the front gate for ten minutes. When you didn't show up, I figured you were busy doing your home room president thing back in the classroom. You know, I have no idea why you take that stuff so seriously. Sometimes you act like you're the Prime Minister of Japan!"

Ryoko giggled. "I'm sorry. I'm just trying to do the best job I can. That's what you all elected me to do, isn't it?" Ryoko looked out the train window at the passing scene. "I hate to ruin a good surprise, Miss Suzumiya, but where are we going?"

"We're going shopping... at the Nakamichi Mall! We're going to get you that blue hair ribbon and maybe some other stuff. There's a lot of really cool fashion shops and beauty salons at that place that I've been dying to check out." Haruhi turned to her companion with a stern expression. "Just so you know, you're paying for everything today, including _my_ clothes and makeup - as a penalty for what you did this morning! Do you understand that?"

Ryoko smiled and nodded. "That's fair." She patted her bag. "I brought my credit card."

"And one more thing," the bossy girl added. "From now on drop the Miss Suzumiya stuff … and just call me Haruhi."

Ryoko smiled. She scanned the train cabin to make sure nobody was watching before turning and leaning over toward the girl sitting next to her.

Haruhi did not complain when Ryoko Asakura kissed her on the cheek.


	8. Honesty

.

**Chapter 8: Honesty**

* * *

Kyon closed the classroom door and took a few steps toward Nagato, holding out the note. "Why am I getting the feeling you're not the person that wanted to meet me here?"

Yuki took the note from Kyon's hand and analyzed it before handing it back. "This note was authored by Ryoko Asakura. I have been monitoring her data activity. She surreptitiously annexed the data space surrounding this classroom for a yet unknown reason. I do not know why she asked you to come here."

"Wait. So what Taniguchi told me this morning is true? Ryoko Asakura is like you? She's part of that data entity, too?"

"Yes."

"Well what the hell did she need to talk to me for… in here? She can talk to me anytime!"

"I do not know. Whatever her purpose was, she went to great lengths to create a space well insulated from the outside world… including me."

Kyon scratched his head. "Well I know she had a huge blowout with Suzumiya today. Maybe she wanted to talk to me about that?"

Nagato shrugged.

Kyon raised the slip of paper and slowly turned full circle in the room. "Well if Asakura wants to talk to me so badly, where the hell is she?"

* * *

Ryoko Asakura held up the hanger holding the tiny black dress. It was one of many outfits she'd picked out for her friend at Venus, the clothing store in whose large main dressing room the two schoolgirls now stood. She handed the sexy garment to Haruhi Suzumiya. "I know you'll look good in this," she said with a giggle.

Haruhi studied the tiny piece of black fabric with wide eyes. "You want me to wear _this tiny thing?_ No way!"

"You totally have the body for it," Ryoko replied. "Please try it on."

Haruhi giggled as she lifted the dress from the hanger. "It's funny. The last time you asked me to please do something, I couldn't say no either."

"How did that work out?" Ryoko asked.

"Not too bad," Haruhi replied with a shy smile. She handed Ryoko the dress, put out her arms, and looked her companion in the eyes. "Strip me."

"What?" Ryoko asked. "What do you mean?"

"Like you did in the classroom this morning. Do that magic trick again. You took off my bra like I wasn't even wearing one; my panties, too." Haruhi dropped her arms to her sides. "Does the trick work better if I stand like this?"

Ryoko looked down at the ground. "I'm not sure what you mean."

Haruhi put her hands behind her back, grabbing one hand with the other. She started slowly walking around the flustered girl standing in the center of the room.

"Look Ryoko. I had a lot of time to think about what happened to me this morning… and I'm not stupid." Haruhi paused and turned toward the girl. "Some of the things you did… well they just don't add up. There's something going on with you and I think we both know it."

Ryoko remained silent, though she felt her cheeks flushing.

"For example," Haruhi continued, "there is no way you could have stripped me that quickly … in the blink of an eye … both my bra and panties … off. That's like only a tenth of a second!"

"But—," Ryoko started to say.

Haruhi held up her hand, cutting her off. "And that's not all that wasn't possible." Haruhi blinked as her cheeks started flushing as well. Her voice dropped down to a whisper. "How hard you made me _come_… that wasn't possible either. I've never felt that good in my entire life. I didn't know it was possible for someone to do something like that to me."

"I—," Ryoko tried to say.

But Haruhi waved her off. "I thought about this all day. And it just didn't make sense. None of it made sense. You didn't make sense. _We_ didn't make sense. It's all totally impossible." Haruhi placed her hands on her hips and with excited eyes said, "And it's exactly the kind of stuff _I live for!_"

Ryoko didn't speak.

"We've known each other for a while now," Haruhi continued. "And we haven't exactly been the best of friends. You've always been the perfect student; always on time, excellent grades, always friendly, never breaking the rules, never getting into trouble, _unanimously_ elected home room president! You're almost _too_ perfect!"

Ryoko nodded quietly.

"And now all of a sudden… _this!_ Coming on to me the way you did!" Haruhi giggled again.

"I was really sick last week," Ryoko replied, a frown creasing her face. "And I'm still not feeling completely… normal."

Haruhi stopped and took hold of her classmate's hands. "Ryoko. Before we go any further, and yes, _I am _interested in exploring this…"

Upon hearing those words, Ryoko's face lit up.

"… If we're going to take our relationship any further, we have to make a pact. An honesty pact. You've got to promise me that you'll absolutely always tell me truth, no matter what." Haruhi's face turned deadly serious. She took a deep breath. "About everything. And I promise I'll do the same for you. But that's how it has to be." Haruhi squeezed Ryoko's hands. "Do you understand?"

Silence filled the dressing room as Ryoko considered Haruhi's request. Then she spoke. "I may end up telling you things you might not be able to accept. Things you may not want to hear."

Haruhi nodded. "I know. I'm sort of expecting that. But those are my terms. We move forward honestly… or not at all."

Ryoko looked deep into Haruhi's eyes and nodded. "I understand." She thought about Haruhi's terms for a few more seconds. "You want me to be completely honest with you… about myself," she put her hand over her heart, "and only me. You won't require me to break the confidence I have with others?"

Haruhi frowned and sighed with a barely audible groan. She crossed her arms over her chest, tilted her head, and squinted. "Okay. I guess that's fair," she said while nodding. "I guess it would be wrong for us to gab about secrets that other people trusted us with. That would be wrong. I probably wouldn't want other people to know the stuff we end up learning about each other either."

Ryoko gave Haruhi a wide smile and squeezed her hands in return. "Then we're seeing things eye to eye. I accept your terms, Miss Suzumiya. From now on, I promise to be completely honest with you. About everything."

Haruhi smiled. "And I promise to be totally honest with you, too, starting with the fact that I hate it when you call me Miss Suzumiya. Like I told you before, my name is Haruhi, okay?"

Ryoko giggled and nodded. "I'll try my best to remember that … Haruhi."

"Then it's a deal," Haruhi said, hugging herself. "I guess we could shake on it," she added softly.

"Yes," Ryoko replied, taking a step closer to Haruhi so their noses nearly touched. "We _could_ do that."

The two girls looked into each others eyes for a few moments with shy smiles on their lips. Slowly, cautiously, happily, those smiling lips inched closer together … till the girls embraced each other in a deep long kiss.

* * *

Yuki Nagato took Taniguchi's hand as they walked down the hill from North High back into the city. "Ryoko Asakura left a note for Kyon today asking to meet him privately in classroom 1-5," she said. "I can not deduce why."

"Wait," Taniguchi replied. "Are we talking about Ryoko Asakura the real life student or Ryoko Asakura the alien? I'm never quite sure when we're playing."

"Alien."

Taniguchi nodded. "Got it. Well I saw Asakura running off with Suzumiya not too long after classes ended. It looks like they made up. By the way, is Suzumiya an alien, too? Cause it wouldn't surprise me a bit."

"No."

"Is Kyon an alien?"

"No."

Taniguchi put his finger to his chin. "Okay then, why would alien Asakura want to talk to Kyon?"

"Perhaps Asakura's change involves Kyon in the same way my change brought me closer to you."

Taniguchi laughed and started shaking his head. "No, Yuki. I don't think so. I love my buddy Kyon, but he could never bag a girl like Ryoko Asakura." Taniguchi paused for a few moments and looked over at his girlfriend. "Then again, I never imagined I'd someday be walking down the street and holding hands with someone as beautiful as you."

Yuki shook her head and smiled.

"If you want to know the truth," Taniguchi continued, "that's not where the sparks were flying today. Asakura had a major run-in with Suzumiya this morning. Rumor has it Suzumiya knocked her out cold. I was kind of shocked to see them so buddy-buddy when they left the school today." Taniguchi laughed. "Hey, maybe Asakura's virus turned her on to Suzumiya! That would be a pretty hot plot twist if you ask me. Those two going at it. Wow!" Taniguchi pretended to wipe some sweat from his brow.

"But why would Asakura want to meet with Kyon?"

"It makes total sense if you ask me. Everybody in the school knows there's something going on between Kyon and Suzumiya. It's obvious Asakura wants to take Kyon out of the picture." Taniguchi laughed again. "Lucky for Kyon we're only role playing."

Yuki Nagato did not laugh.


	9. Wired

.

**Chapter 9: Wired**

* * *

Haruhi stood in the center of the changing room and watched Ryoko Asakura rummage through her school bag on the bench. Ryoko extracted a fine point felt tip marker and stowed it between her breasts. Then she knelt down, reached into one of Haruhi's shopping bags, and extracted a pair of shoes. She stood and turned, the black high heels dangling from her index finger while her left hand held the tiny black dress.

Haruhi looked at the girl with with wide, disbelieving eyes. "You're going to put me in that? Now? For real?"

"Yep." Ryoko nodded with a cute smile. "In the blink of an eye." She jiggled the shoes. "Be sure to jump up at least as high as these heels, okay? And keep your arms straight up as if you're trying to touch the ceiling. Keep your eyes closed while you jump! I won't do it if you cheat and peek."

"Okay." Haruhi nodded. "I promise not to look. When should I jump?"

Ryoko nodded, "Any time."

"What's the pen for?"

"You'll see. It's a surprise. Oh wait… Just a second." Ryoko turned with her arm extended, her palm facing the vent on the dressing room's far wall. There was a faint "pop", like the sound of a single piece of popcorn popping. "Okay. Whenever you're ready."

Haruhi took a deep breath and crouched down. She clenched her eyes shut, then rapidly rose launching herself straight up into the air. At the apex of her jump, Haruhi felt something akin to feathers and wind rushing past her body. She almost stumbled on the way down, the soles of her feet hitting the floor at an odd angle. Fortunately Ryoko held Haruhi's arm to steady her.

When Haruhi opened her eyes, she found herself several inches taller and a little bit lighter, the bulky school uniform and shoes replaced by the heels and the tiny black dress. Haruhi checked the mirror and noticed a mark on her chest. She looked down into her cleavage and was shocked to see a little red heart drawn on her right breast with the symbols "R+H" written inside of it.

"I KNEW IT!" Haruhi shouted with a big happy grin. "You're NOT a normal human being, are you?" Haruhi said, pushing her hands down over her hips, adjusting the tight dress as she turned toward her companion.

Ryoko returned a pensive look. "No, I'm not. Is that okay?"

Haruhi's wide happy smile grew wider. "IS IT _EVER!_" She walked over to Ryoko, then squinted her eyes. "You're not a normal human… But you _are_ human, aren't you? I'd feel pretty weird if you were a robot or something."

"Close your eyes again for a second," Ryoko replied with a sweet smile. Haruhi obeyed. When she opened her eyes, a beautiful naked girl stood before her. With wrists crossed overhead, Ryoko turned slowly wiggling her hips like a genie just released from her bottle. Haruhi examined the girl; perfect hourglass figure; bright smile; full breasts; thick flowing hair reaching down to her firm round bottom; long toned legs. She noted Ryoko's neatly folded school uniform, sitting on the bench next to her own uniform.

Haruhi reached forward and gently caressed Ryoko's breasts, confirming they were real. "How can you do that stuff, this speed-changing?"

Ryoko held up a finger. "One, I'm really, really fast." A second finger joined it. "And two, I cheat a little. I can control the passage of time in the data space in close proximity to my body. It's called personal time dilation. I slow time down relative to your frame of reference when your eyes are closed and speed it back up to correct things once your eyes are open. Since I'm standing still when I do that last part, you really don't notice any differences."

"What was that popping sound just now?"

"Oh that," Ryoko giggled. "That was their secret security camera. I put it out of commission with a focused EMF pulse."

Haruhi released Ryoko's breasts and took a step back. "Wow. This is _really_ crazy. How did you know that camera was there?" Haruhi hugged herself and looked down at her tiny outfit again. "Wow… I just have so many questions. This is just crazy. And _I knew it!_ I knew you were different! I just knew it! THIS IS SOOOOOOO COOL!"

"Can I put my clothes on now?"

"Not yet." Haruhi walked over to one of Ryoko's bags and pulled out a blue ribbon. "I want to see what you look like wearing this first." She stepped behind Ryoko and ran her fingers through the girl's long flowing hair before pulling it back into a ponytail. "And only this."

* * *

The two girls walked though the spacious shop-lined corridors of the Nakamichi Mall, their gorgeous faces enhanced with makeup, skin-tight tiny outfits hugging their perfect figures. Ryoko carried their bags as Haruhi flipped through the pictures she'd taken with her Smartphone. "I bet the guys at school would pay me a ton of money for this shot," Haruhi said as she shared the picture with Ryoko. It was a very sexy pose. Ryoko was partially bent over with hands on knees, full breasts dangling freely, hair flowing forward over her shoulder, tied into a ponytail with a shiny blue ribbon - the ribbon was the only fabric in the picture.

"You wouldn't do that, would you?" Ryoko asked with a concerned frown.

"Don't worry girlfriend. This one's just for me." She reached over and took Ryoko's arm. "So let me get this straight. You're a 100% normal human girl, but you're also a humanoid interface?"

"That's right," Ryoko nodded. "Because where I come from communication is completely digital at a very high level, making communication with analog humans impossible. So I'm like a hybrid, somewhere in between. Because of my connection to the digital collective I'm able to do things human girls can't do. I can manifest many supernatural abilities, like super speed, super strength, time dilation; because of that connection."

"So technically you're an alien?"

"Well, yes, I suppose that's right. I started out up there," Ryoko looked up toward the sky, "as part of an astral entity, so I guess that's what I'd be relative to normal humans."

Since it was a weekday, mall foot traffic was sparse. Still there seemed to be no shortage of appreciative men taking in the view of the two beautiful women. Haruhi groaned when one of them whistled at them. She turned to check on the size of the pack of guys following them now, albeit at a polite distance.

"Men," Haruhi said with a chuckle as she shook her head. "They can be such boneheads."

"Is it my turn for a question?" Ryoko asked.

Haruhi nodded. "Sure, go ahead."

"How do you feel about Kyon? Do you love him?"

"RYOKO!" Haruhi blushed. "That's kind of personal, don't you think?"

"And my being an alien isn't?" Ryoko giggled. "Honesty… remember?"

Haruhi nodded. "Yes. That was the deal." She took a deep breath. "I'm not really sure how I feel about Kyon. I don't know if I love him… you know… that way. I know I piss him off a lot, and I really like to ride him." Ryoko's eyes widened. Haruhi smacked Ryoko on the arm. "No, silly! Not ride him like that! I mean I like to get him angry, just for fun. I think it's a defense mechanism or something. I really don't know… But I do know this. I feel that I need him. He's the only one in the SOS Brigade that's willing to stand up to me. And I won't ever admit this to anybody, but that backstop makes me feel more secure. He won't let me go overboard with things and I need that. Does that make sense?"

"I think I understand." Ryoko paused thoughtfully, then asked, "Do you love _me?_"

"Ryoko, that's not fair. This is only our first date. Don't be in such a rush! And besides, it's my turn to ask a question."

"Okay, I'm sorry."

"This may sound strange, but what's with the X-ray eyes?"

"Huh?"

Haruhi sighed. "Okay, let me explain. Here's the thing. I've dated a ton of guys. None of the relationships lasted very long, but I got a lot of variety." Haruhi giggled. "And yes, I dated a few girls, too." She looked deep into Ryoko's eyes. "And there was always a difference. You see, the guys always looked at me with what I called X-ray eyes. It was as if they were trying to see through my clothes or something. It bothered me at first but after a while I decided I didn't really mind because I could tell that they thought I was hot. When I changed my outlook, I found the looks to be kind of flattering."

Ryoko nodded. "I never really noticed."

Haruhi laughed. "Trust me girlfriend. You get those looks, too." Then she shrugged her shoulders. "But here's the thing. The girls never looked at me that way."

"I'm still not sure I know what you mean," Ryoko said. "I've made no effort to see through your clothing. It's not something I'm able to do. But I really do appreciate how good you look with your clothes off. The view of your naked body has a profound effect on my systems."

"Yeah, that's it!" Haruhi replied. "This difference always bugged me. But then I did some research! And I found out that human guys are just wired differently. They're totally visual. Straight, gay, it doesn't matter. If you look at gay guys, for example, they're twice as likely to be all buff and good looking than a straight guy – because that stuff matters to guys and they know it. So they try their best to look good. _Because they're all visual._"

"Uh-huh," Ryoko said, struggling to understand.

"But if you look at lesbians, they're twice as likely to be fat! Studies show that 75% of gay women are obese; that's also twice the average, but in the opposite direction. You know why? Because for girls it's all about feelings, not looks! They're just not wired that way so they don't care about their looks as much."

Ryoko nodded. "I think I understand."

Haruhi pointed at Ryoko's eyes. "You, Ryoko Asakura, look at me exactly like a guy! I totally picked up on that when you were hitting on me this morning. I could feel your eyes trying to burn through my clothes, and it threw me off. I didn't figure it out till later."

Ryoko blushed; then her eyes lit up as if a light bulb had been turned on inside her head. "I had a similar reaction when I looked at my own body this weekend… after recovering from my illness!" Ryoko giggled. "I spent most of the weekend staring at myself and masturbating."

Haruhi nodded. "I knew it! So what do you think happened? Something must have changed when you got sick."

"I think I know what happened. When I and my compatriot first transferred our conscious minds to our human bodies, my compatriot chose to be a girl. She chose a very disarming feminine form. I chose a male body. However, I quickly decided I didn't like it and switched to a female body as well."

"What was wrong with being a guy?"

"I wasn't happy with the aesthetics." Ryoko giggled. "Too much hair everywhere. I sort of envied my superior."

"I see," Haruhi said with a smile, before realizing… "Hey! So there's another alien at North High? Who is it?"

"I can't say," Ryoko replied, "without revealing someone else's secret."

Haruhi frowned. "I understand. Okay... so you started as a guy but then you changed over to a girl's body. You know what? I'm guessing that you only changed your outward appearance didn't you?"

"No. I adhered fully to the female template I was assigned. Anatomically I'm indistinguishable from you - down to my fallopian tubes."

Haruhi shook her head. "No Ryoko! That's where you messed up. You see when you're a guy, you're a guy to the core!" Haruhi pointed to her head. "It's something in the brain! Heck, there's gender confused guys having sex change operations all the time down here on earth, trying to do it by changing their parts. But it doesn't change their wiring - just the way they look. And it doesn't matter how many female hormones they pump into themselves afterwards. It doesn't change the core."

Ryoko looked over at Haruhi with an astonished expression. "I became ill because the digital entity contracted a virus. As it worked to eradicate the bug, I was separated from the collective and forced to rely solely on my human body for sustenance. And you're right! Male autonomic systems kicked in as soon as I got out of bed, when I viewed my female body. I thought I was going insane. Before the illness, I'd always had complete control."

"I bet," replied Haruhi. "You've spent so many years living the part of being a girl that you freaked when your base guy instincts had the chance to rear their horny heads!" Haruhi started laughing. "Wow that is _so_ funny. You really _are_ a hybrid!"

Ryoko looked down at the floor. "Does that bother you?"

"Nope!" Haruhi replied. "I think it's awesome. Because it explains everything! Why I'm attracted to you, why I couldn't say no to you when you made love to me. It all makes sense now!" Haruhi giggled. "I _knew_ I wasn't a lesbian! I dated all kinds of girls and it never did a thing for me, even when I went out with the pretty ones. But with you it felt totally different! And that's why!"

"Because I'm a girl, with these weird guy instincts mixed in?"

"No! Because you're you! You're something totally unique. A smoking hot girl with just the right mix of guy wiring! And that's okay. In fact, it just might be the perfect combination!" Haruhi stopped and pulled Ryoko's arm back, turning her to face her. "Look at me, Ryoko, in this outfit, wearing this makeup, and tell me what your body is telling you to do."

Ryoko's face instantly adopted a wicked smile, with devious eyes that quickly glanced down at her tingling fingers. "It's telling me that I should rip that hot little dress off of your body… and make you scream," Ryoko giggled, "just like I did this morning."

"I totally _love_ that look!" Haruhi took Ryoko's arm and turned her toward the escalator heading down to the train station. "I think it's time for us to go home."


	10. Another Note

.

**Chapter 10: Another Note**

* * *

Haruhi softly kissed Ryoko's cheek before sliding out from under the covers and hopping down onto the carpeted floor.

Ryoko blinked drowsy eyes and studied the naked girl's backside as she strolled to the bathroom. "You are so beautiful," Ryoko sighed.

"You keep saying that." Haruhi shook her head as she checked the cabinet. "Can I use this one?" Haruhi shook a packaged green toothbrush at the girl.

"Yes. Though I'd be happier if you came back to bed."

Haruhi spread some toothpaste on the brush. "You know what's cool about having a lesbian love affair? My parents don't freak when I tell them I'm sleeping over at a girl's place."

Ryoko Asakura rolled out of bed and walked over to the bathroom. She stepped behind the tooth-brushing girl and gave her a hug from behind, pressing her soft breasts into Haruhi's back. "I love you," she said as she planted a kiss on Haruhi's shoulder.

Haruhi shook her head again. "You say _that_ a lot, too." She looked into the eyes of Ryoko's reflection in the mirror. "But you don't really mean it. That's something I learned from dating all those guys, too."

"I feel like I do." Ryoko playfully squeezed Haruhi's breasts. "I know I love these."

"Yes _that_ I believe. But there's a whole lot more to real love than what they write about in fairy tales."

Ryoko's right hand slid down between Haruhi's legs and started working its magic. "You mean this?"

Haruhi tensed and moaned. "Ryoko! Stop it!" Ryoko did not stop. "Damn. I still don't understand how you can be so incredibly good at getting me off!" Haruhi said through a mouth full of foam. "It's not natural!"

"No it's not," Ryoko replied with the sweetest giggle. She feathered kisses on her partner's sensitive neck while turning up the heat down below.

"Ohhhhhh shit!" Haruhi gasped. "Hang on just a second! Let me rinse." Haruhi quickly took a gulp of water and spit the contents of her mouth into the sink. When she turned to face Ryoko, Haruhi stopped - and moved her hand up to the smiling girl's chin. "I'm so sorry about this bruise. I didn't mean to slug you so hard." Haruhi kissed the offended spot. Then her eyes went wide with wonder when the bruise evaporated before her eyes.

"Thanks," Ryoko said, rubbing her chin. "It feels much better. I guess I owe you one now." Ryoko gently lifted Haruhi up and set her bare bottom down on the counter next to the sink.

Haruhi leaned back, spread her legs, and closed her eyes.

* * *

_"Sorry I couldn't make it last time,"_ the note read. _"But I'll be there today I promise! Please meet me in classroom 1-5 after school has let out." _

Kyon shook his head as he closed the shoe locker. "Well, the girl is persistent. I'll give her that," he said to himself.

When Kyon got to home room, nothing seemed out of the ordinary… at first. Haruhi was in her own world as usual, staring out the window, thinking deep thoughts. He sat down in his seat, hanged his backpack on his desk, and turned toward the front of the class.

There was the note's likely author, Home Room President Asakura, pacing the classroom, making sure all the chores were completed and the chalkboards were stocked with chalk. He watched her for several minutes. Those chalkboards seemed to need a lot of attention today - which wasn't too out of the ordinary. Still Kyon had the feeling Ryoko was purposely avoiding the back of the room today.

That made sense considering yesterday's alleged brawl. Kyon struggled to see if Ryoko still had a bruise on her cheek. He turned away when Ryoko noticed his glare, but they both did their best to avoid eye contact.

Kyon turned back to Haruhi. "Hey, how's it going? I missed you at the club room yesterday."

"Oh that," Haruhi replied with an uncharacteristically content smile. "I had some stuff I had to take care of. I probably won't make it today, either."

"What kind of stuff were you taking care of?" Kyon probed.

Haruhi shrugged her shoulders. "Just stuff."

"I heard you really got into it with Asakura yesterday."

Haruhi's eyes widened with an embarrassed look of shock. But she recovered quickly. "_Oh_, you mean our little skirmish before P.E."

"Rumor has it you slugged her so hard you knocked her out."

"It was nothing." Haruhi turned to the window; it was her way of telling Kyon she really didn't want to talk about it.

Still, he was a little surprised. Haruhi's typical melancholy aura was not evident today; it had been replaced by an unmistakably pleasant glow.

Asakura continued focusing on home room president business at the front of the room… while Haruhi focused on the horizon out the window. Yes, there was definitely some uneasiness between these two, and they were both trying way too hard to hide it. Kyon patted the note in his pocket. Asakura was going to enlist him as the peacemaker. Asakura the humanoid interface; tasked to watch the goddess. The poor girl was probably getting pressure from that stupid data entity thing as well. Kyon shook his head and sighed. It all made perfect sense now.

* * *

As the day progressed, Kyon studied the behavior of the two warring girls. And he could tell he wasn't the only one. The Asakura-Suzumiya altercation had created quite the buzz in their class. It was becoming painfully obvious to everyone that the two were very uneasy around each other.

Kyon chuckled to himself. What a combination! Stubborn Suzumiya's pride. Sweet Asakura's fear of confrontation. You could cut the tension between the two with a knife.

Kyon could tell it was starting to wear on Haruhi. He picked up on her reversion back to a more melancholy state not long after lunch. Her classmate's side stares, their knowing nods and whisperings; they were obviously starting to get Haruhi down.

Yes, this craziness had to end. As one of the few people in the world – heck, maybe the only person in the world - who had Haruhi's ear, Kyon knew he was the right guy for the job.

The rest of the day seemed uneventful. Classes progressed as usual until...

Haruhi ran her hand over Kyon's shoulder seconds before the start of the last class period, math class. Kyon jumped at the unfamiliar gesture as if the Brigade leader had shoved a taser into his arm. He turned toward the girl.

"I want you to know," Haruhi said with an indecipherable expression, "that I really appreciate what you do for the Brigade. It really means a lot to me. And you do, too."

"Huh?!" Kyon said, feeling as if Haruhi had set the taser to "high" and pressed it down into his skull. What the hell? Where did _that_ come from? And what did it mean?

He wanted to talk to the girl but the lecture had started; the teacher now pointing at an equation on the front chalkboard, asking the class for a solution.

Kyon pulled the note out of his pocket and held it close to his chest.

None of this was making any sense.

* * *

Kyon wasn't surprised when Haruhi bolted out of the classroom at the bell. Haruhi's words had weighed on him, leaving the SOS Brigade's first member so puzzled he'd totally forgotten about his appointment in classroom 1-5. Kyon felt the need to go to the club room, to finish the conversation, to find out what she meant.

But he remembered his appointment the second he walked up to his shoe locker. This time he would not keep Miss Asakura waiting.

Kyon walked quickly back to classroom 1-5. When he stepped through the door, he wasn't surprised to see Ryoko Asakura standing in the darkened room by the chalkboards, waiting patiently with her hands behind her back.

Kyon waved the note at her. "You know you don't have to be so secretive about this. I have no problem helping you and Suzumiya fix your rift. She can be a little stubborn at times, but deep underneath that angry exterior is a really great person."

Ryoko Asakura giggled. "I'm sorry Kyon. I don't think you understand why I asked to meet you here."

"Oh really?" Kyon crossed his arms over his chest. "Then tell me why you want to meet me."

"First of all, I want you to know that I think you're a wonderful person as well. You really must be someone very special to be as important to Miss Suzumiya as you are."

Kyon returned a confused look, hearing almost an exact echo of what Haruhi seemed to have told him.

She continued, "And I have nothing against you personally. But I can sense that there's some confusion in Miss Suzumiya's mind right now. And a large part of that confusion is related to you."

The color drained from Kyon's face when Ryoko Asakura swung her right hand forward – holding a combat knife! "What the hell are you doing with that thing?"

Ryoko giggled. "It's a knife. And I'm going to kill you with it."

"WHAT?!"

Ryoko slowly walked toward Kyon. "Don't worry. I'll make your end quick and painless."

"WAIT A SECOND!" Kyon screamed. He turned and ran toward the door.

But the door and the wall it was bolted to were gone, replaced by a shimmering force field. He bounced off of the barrier, then turned to face Asakura, who was coming ever closer with the knife.

"I have complete control over this space," Ryoko said, emphasizing the words with her free hand. "Nobody knows that we're here. And nobody is coming to rescue you. Please don't make this harder than it needs to be. I'm going to kill you no matter what."

"Damn it!" Kyon said as slid down the wall toward toward the corner. "Has everybody lost their minds?" Suddenly Kyon took a deep breath and became visibly more relaxed. He crossed his arms over his chest and straightened. "No Miss Asakura. You're not going to kill me. At least not today."

"Oh really," Ryoko replied, looking genuinely perplexed. "Why do you say that?" Her expression became even more perplexed when she felt someone tapping her on the shoulder.

Ryoko turned to see who was behind her. The last thing she remembered seeing before hitting the floor was a fist flying toward her jaw.

* * *

Ryoko Asakura opened her eyes with a gasp for air. As foggy eyes focused, she found herself on her back staring up at the ceiling of her bedroom. Cold water was rolling off of her cheeks, dampening her hair and white bed sheet. She shook her head groggily, blinking the water out of her eyes, simultaneously becoming conscious of a throbbing pain emanating from her chin. When Ryoko tried to move her hand toward her face, she found that she was unable. With alert eyes wide open now, she looked up; then she looked down.

Ryoko Asakura quickly realized that she was tightly tied spread eagle to her bed – and completely naked.

"What?"

She turned her head to the side… and saw Haruhi Suzumiya standing over her, an empty glass in one hand, the other on her hip. And a very disappointed look on her face.

"RYOKO! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"

Ryoko furled her wet eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders as much as she was able in her restrained state.

"YOU CAN'T JUST GO AND KILL EVERYONE YOU PERCEIVE AS A RIVAL! YOU IDIOT!"

Ryoko returned an embarrassed frown. "I'm sorry. It just seemed like the most direct approach. I thought it would help you with your confusion. Having less people to think about."

Haruhi looked down at Ryoko with an eye so evil, had it been a laser it would have burned a hole through Ryoko's head. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TRIED TO KILL KYON! I AM _SO _UPSET WITH YOU RIGHT NOW!"

Ryoko studied the lengths of rope binding her arms and legs fast to the bed frame like an X. "You know these ropes aren't strong enough to hold me."

Ignoring Ryoko's words, Haruhi crossed her arms over her chest and continued her rant, "YOU ARE _SO _GOING TO SUFFER FOR THAT!"

Ryoko pulled her arms together, confident she'd easily snap the rope's fibers; or at worst bend the bed frame. But the ropes would not budge and the bed frame stayed put.

"No, my dear. You're not going anywhere. Not for a while. Not till I'm through with you."

"How?" Ryoko asked, a flash of fear in her eyes.

Haruhi shot Ryoko a sly smile. "I was thinking about what you told me yesterday, about your _compatriot_. You know, the one who decided to become a girl. And I started going through the list of people at North High that were sick and changed recently. In particular, I started thinking about a certain book worm that recently transformed into an idol, who went from turning pages and blending in with the furniture, to regularly taking the high hard one from Taniguchi - and loving it."

"Miss Nagato."

"I talked to her during lunch. She's been watching you. She figured you'd be having some post-virus issues, too. She and Taniguchi pretty much put together what you were planning to do." Haruhi shrugged. "You know, for a dweeb, he's a pretty sharp guy. Nagato had you covered and created a back door. We snuck into your little data space just in time!"

Ryoko tried again to free herself, pulling on the ropes with all her might. But they did not budge a millimeter.

"Yuki reinforced the ropes," Haruhi patted the mattress, "and the bed." Haruhi knelt, set down her glass, and picked a couple items up off the floor. She stood up with a five-tailed leather whip in one hand and a high tech ball-tipped wand in the other. "She also gave me a few things to use for your punishment." Haruhi set the whip down on Ryoko's firm belly, then reached down and twisted the helpless girl's nipple – hard!

"OWWWWW!" Ryoko yelped.

Haruhi sat down on the bed next to her prisoner and lovingly massaged the recently offended breast. She took a deep breath. "Okay, I know you've only been a human for a few years. And this seemed like the most direct way to get what you want. _But you can't just go and kill everyone that gets in your way! S_ure, Kyon is very important to me. But you've got a lot going for you, too." Haruhi's angry frown morphed into a small smile. She giggled. "You're just so damned _interesting!_ Even this little episode... It's just so… YOU!"

Ryoko nodded with a quizzical small smile of her own. "So you're not mad at me?"

"HELL YES I'M MAD AT YOU! But I'm pretty sure I can get over it." Haruhi bent forward and kissed Ryoko's chin. "Sorry again about the bruise."

Ryoko nodded meekly - then looked up in shock.

"Uh-uh," Haruhi shook her head as she wagged her finger. "You won't be able to fix yourself till I let you go." An evil smile crossed Haruhi's lips as she picked up the whip. "That's right girlfriend." She swished it through the air. "This is one night you're going to remember for a long, long time."

"What are you going to do to me?" the vulnerable nude girl asked, with wide frightened eyes.

Haruhi switched on the wand and touched its glowing buzzing ball tip to Ryoko's breast, eliciting a chirp. "Whatever the hell I want."


	11. Plausible Explanations

.

**Chapter 11: Plausible Explanations**

* * *

"So… the plot thickens. You were able to save Kyon from Ryoko's knife." Taniguchi rested his chin on his hands. "Actually I suppose Suzumiya did the saving… with that devastating right hook!"

"Yes. And in saving Kyon, Suzumiya also saved Asakura," Yuki replied. "Had she not intervened, I would likely have terminated Asakura's data link."

"What's bad about that? Isn't that exactly what the virus did?"

"No. Virus eradication protocols necessitate cessation of all non-vital data flows. However the data link remains intact."

"I see. That's why the data entity didn't get better as soon as you did. The pipe was there, but the water was shut off! ... So what happens if you actually terminate her link?"

"Asakura would cease to exist."

"Whoa Yuki! That seems kind of severe, doesn't it? ... Then again, she did try to kill Kyon." Taniguchi pictured the events in his mind and crossed his arms. "Okay, Miss Nagato, I still see a couple problems with the story that we need to fix."

"What problems?"

"First of all - and this is nitpicking - but when Suzumiya slugged Asakura for real everyone saw the bruise. She didn't have a bruise today."

"Asakura is able to instantly heal herself."

Taniguchi nodded his head. "I guess that works… kinda." He waved it off. "It's not a big deal anyway. Okay, next point. You and Asakura are supposed to be these souped-up aliens, right?" Yuki nodded. "Then how is Suzumiya able to knock Asakura unconscious? I know the girl is pretty strong. She kicks everybody's butts at anything athletic. But knocking you humanoids out shouldn't be possible if she's just a human. Right?"

Yuki was about to speak, but Taniguchi held up his hand and cut her off.

"I got this. Here's what I think we should do. We should make Suzumiya an alien, too!" Taniguchi furled his brow. "No. Wait. That's no good because you and Asakura are already aliens. That's too many aliens." He shook his head, clearing the idea from his mind. "But there's got to be something, you know, _different _about Suzumiya. If there's one thing everyone agrees on, it's that Suzumiya is, well, _different!_ Remember those symbols she drew on the athletic field a few years ago? ... Now that I think of it, we should work that in somewhere."

"Haruhi Suzumiya is special. She has the power to manipulate the environment around her for her benefit. Though she is not consciously aware of the extent her powers, she is capable of anything. She could, theoretically, remake the universe at will."

Taniguchi thought about Yuki's idea for a minute. "That works. The Great Goddess Haruhi Suzumiya! It may be overkill, but what the heck? It makes for a good story." Taniguchi nodded. "So she knocked out Asakura because she fully expected that to happen when she hit her. She had no idea she was actually taking out a super being. She just went and did it!" Taniguchi laughed. "That _is_ pretty good. A single punch K.O. would be a piece of cake for a goddess." Taniguchi lightly tapped Yuki's cheek with his fist and feigned intense pain. "Anyone else tries that, they break their fist!"

"The symbols?" Yuki asked.

"Easy. Those are the symbols that attracted you aliens to Earth in the first place. Somehow Suzumiya knew exactly what to write in a language your entity thingy could decipher."

"Yes. The symbols said, 'I am right here.'"

"Okay then, this is all starting to come together. I really like where you're taking this, Yuki. We really should write all this down and make a book out of it or something. I'm sure none of these people would mind. Heck, they might even be flattered! They could show the book to their friends and say, 'Hey check this out. This character is me!'" Taniguchi frowned. "Then again, there's no way I'd tell Kyon the part about you and Suzumiya rescuing him from Asakura's knife. He's sensitive about the whole Suzumiya-and-him dating thing. I rag him pretty hard about that." Taniguchi chuckled. "But the part about you helping Suzumiya tie Asakura to her bed naked is just so hot. We _have _to find a way to keep that part!"

"Yes. That part was very… stimulating." Yuki unconsciously grabbed her wrist behind her back, subtly wiggling her hips and pushing her breasts forward as she did, all the while offering her boyfriend the faintest smile.

Taniguchi shot Nagato a pleased devious grin. "You never cease to amaze me, Yuki Nagato. ... Are you ticklish?"

Yuki shrugged. "Maybe."

Taniguchi laughed as he scanned her apartment. His gaze stopped first at the bedroom door. "Unfortunately, you don't have a bed that I could tie you to. Just that floor cushion." He scanned further. His eyes stopped at Yuki's kitchen. He pointed to her square kitchen table. "Does that table have an extension so we can make it just a little bit longer? We could use it like that but it would rock if we could extend it a bit."

Yuki nodded.

"And do you have any of that super special rope laying around, you know, the stuff you tied up Asakura with so she couldn't get free?"

Yuki nodded again.

"We can explore our role-play Suzumiya character some more later on. But first, I believe that some lucky guy _is having Yuki Nagato for dinner!_"

"I understand," Yuki said with bright eyes and an anxious but excited giggle.

As Taniguchi stepped into her bedroom to retrieve the comforter for a table cover, Yuki jogged to her kitchen. Making sure Taniguchi wasn't watching, Yuki rested her hands on the table. It glowed, then magically extended itself two feet; several coils of soft cotton rope materialized on top of its newly-elongated surface seconds later.

Yuki smiled and started removing her clothes.

* * *

"I want you two to make up," Haruhi said.

"WHAT? YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!" Kyon stopped talking when he noticed everyone in home room was staring at him. He whispered, "Haruhi! That girl tried to kill me yesterday!"

Haruhi frowned. "Oh come on Kyon. You don't really believe that, do you?"

"You think I was over-reacting … when she came at me _with a knife?!_"

"Look Kyon." Haruhi pointed up at the ceiling-mounted LCD projector. "The room was really dark and she went through the trouble to point that projector at the wall to make it look like it was glowing. Would a real killer do that?"

Kyon sat back in his chair with a perplexed look. _The "glowing wall"?_ What was Haruhi saying?

"She was just trying to scare you! Don't you see that now?"

Huh? What the hell? Kyon hadn't run into some glowing wall. That was a fucking force field!

_Haruhi was covering for Ryoko Asakura! _

He wanted to laugh. After all, how many times had Kyon lied to cover up supernatural occurrences caused by Haruhi Suzumiya herself? Haruhi obviously knew that Ryoko was… special. _And she didn't want Kyon to know!_

Which was fine with Kyon. Haruhi had no doubt analyzed the situation, and worked out a plausible _non-supernatural_ explanation in her mind. Kyon, the master of fabricating plausible explanations, suppressed a smile. He was starting to enjoy being in the other chair.

Kyon had no problem playing dumb. Still, it would look wrong if he didn't quiz Haruhi, just a little bit. "Okay then. I guess I understand the wall thing." Sure, he understood it. The _projector's light_ went out around the same time Ryoko had her lights punched out! "Why did you hit her?"

Haruhi crossed her arms over her chest. "Because she pissed me off!"

"Lover's spat?" Kyon joked.

Haruhi nodded, not a hint of humor in her eyes. "Yes. Actually it was something like that."

"WHAT?"

"It's true Kyon. Ryoko and I kind of like each other."

Kyon sat there in a state of shock. It was all starting to make sense. He sat silently and listened.

"I don't expect you to understand this, but it's something I'm exploring. And it's not like you think. But I can't go into that right now." Haruhi sighed. "Frankly, I don't really understand it myself."

Kyon nodded. He actually _did _understand completely why Haruhi would be attracted to a real life alien. That part made more sense than anything else she'd said.

"So you two are dating?" he asked.

"I don't know. We're spending time together. It's complicated. But that's why Ryoko put on that show yesterday. She knows we spend a lot of time together and that you're important to me. She wanted to scare you off. It was stupid."

"Okay." Kyon nodded his head. "I can understand that," he said honestly.

Haruhi looked up and waved toward the front of the class. Moments later a very humble and repentant Ryoko Asakura stood in front of Kyon.

"I'm very sorry if I scared you yesterday," she said. "It was really just my idea of a joke. Looking back on it, I know it was a really bad joke. I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me."

Kyon looked up at Ryoko. "I can't say I fully understand everything that's going on. But then again, I admit that don't understand dirt when it comes to girls." He shrugged. "Besides, you took a pretty good shot to the chin. It's not like you didn't get more payback than you deserved."

Ryoko extended her hand. "Friends?"

Kyon reached up and shook it. "Friends."

* * *

Once again Kyon, Kunikida and Taniguchi sat on the bleachers facing the running track.

Kunikida pointed down at two runners in the distance, Ryoko Asakura and Haruhi Suzumiya. The two were running leisurely laps next to each other and seemed to be sharing a playful conversation as they did. "It's kind of funny how well those two are getting along now. As long as I've known them they never seemed to like each other. But BANG! they get into a huge fight, and now it's like they're BFFs!"

"Uh-huh," Taniguchi said. "Things just built up to a head and finally exploded. That was bound to happen. I'm glad to see them getting along in the aftermath." He patted Kyon on the back. "Asakura won't need to use Kyon as her spokesman anymore."

Kyon watched silently, arms crossed, shaking his head.

"You know Yuki and I came up with an incredible story last night," Taniguchi said with a laugh. "It's a science fiction adventure and it explains everything!"

"Let's hear it," said Kyon.

"Yeah," said Kunikida. "I'd like to hear it, too."

Taniguchi put up his hand. "No. Not yet. I'm in the process of writing it all down. I might turn it into a light novel. I promise I'll share the whole thing with you guys when it's done."

"Okay," both guys nodded.


	12. True Confessions

.

**Chapter 12: True Confessions  
**

* * *

Kyon scanned the front of the classroom before turning to the girl sitting behind him. "You two are keeping a pretty low profile."

Haruhi turned from the window and shot a quick peek at Ryoko, who was busy performing her Home Room Presidential duties at the chalkboard. Haruhi shrugged her shoulders. "I suppose."

"You haven't been coming to club very regularly either."

Haruhi sighed. "Yeah, I suppose that's true, too. I feel kind of bad about that. But it's only temporary, I promise. I'm still trying to work some things out in my mind."

"I understand. If this relationship is as important to you as it seems to be, then you should take your time and focus on it."

"Ryoko isn't like any other person in the world."

Kyon shook his head and laughed. "Neither are you."

Haruhi smiled warmly and put her hand on the forearm Kyon was resting on her desk. "I've got something for you." She reached into her school bag, retrieved a small white box, and handed it to Kyon.

"A gift? For me?"

"Sort of," Haruhi replied with a sly smile. "Go ahead. Open the box and take a look inside."

Kyon opened the box and studied its contents. "A red ribbon?" He ran his hand through his hair – then he looked at Haruhi as if she were crazy.

"It's not for you, dummy! It's for Mikuru! When I saw it at the mall, I knew it was perfect for her!"

"So why don't _you_ give it to her?"

"Because it's the perfect gift and you'd be way too clueless to find something this nice for her yourself."

"But why do you want _me_ to give it to her?"

Haruhi looked deep into Kyon's eyes. "Because she'll love it."

Kyon closed the box and turned it over in his hands.

"Don't pretend to be an idiot, Kyon. Everyone knows you have the hots for that girl. Including Mikuru."

Kyon's expression softened as he looked up at Haruhi's yellow ribbon; then lowered his gaze down to her eyes. "But what about…?" Kyon started to protest, but then shut up.

Haruhi squeezed Kyon's arm. "I know what you're thinking… but let's not go there… not right now. Nobody knows the future."

Kyon put his hand over Haruhi's and nodded. "I understand. Thanks for the ribbon. I have a feeling she's going to love it."

* * *

Taniguchi sat on a bench in the lobby near the school's entrance doors, typing on the laptop computer resting on his lap. He looked up with a startled smile when Yuki Nagato appeared in front of him. "Hi Yuki!" He checked his wrist watch. "Only thirty minutes today. Suzumiya didn't show up again?"

"She did not."

Taniguchi closed the laptop and stuffed it into his backpack. He stood, walked toward the exits, and held the door open for his girlfriend. Yuki stepped through the door and reached for Taniguchi's hand as the two started walking down the hill toward the train station.

"Short meetings are fine by me," Taniguchi said. "Do you think Suzumiya's ditching the SOS Brigade?"

"Her attendance has been… sporadic at best."

Taniguchi scratched his head. "I guess her heart isn't as in to it as it used to be. Which reminds me…" He turned toward his girlfriend. "Can we play a bit? I was working on the novel while I was waiting for you and I have some questions about our story."

"Yes."

"Remember the stuff you were making up about the closed spaces Suzumiya creates with her subconscious? You know, the whole agitated-goddess-nightmare thing?"

"Yes."

"Suzumiya creates these big blue shinjin monsters that wreak havoc in there, right? And then these esper beings take out the monsters she creates, right?"

"Yes."

"I was working on chapter seven when it struck me… wouldn't it be cool if a normal human being wound up inside one of these closed spaces?"

"Yes."

"The logical pick would be Kyon, of course."

"Endeavoring to create a new, more interesting universe, Haruhi Suzumiya manifested a closed space in which only she and Kyon existed."

"Hang on, I like that!" Taniguchi retrieved a small notepad from his pocket and wrote down some notes. "I'm going to use that, that's pretty good." He looked up. "Naturally we can't have Suzumiya creating a whole new universe with new characters, right? If it's a nightmare like the other closed space events, we have to figure out a way for Suzumiya to snap out of it."

"Sleeping Beauty."

"Huh?" Taniguchi squinted and looked down at his girlfriend. "You mean the fairy tale where that girl sleeps forever?"

"Yes."

"Oh wait. I get it. Kyon snaps Suzumiya out of her closed space dream by giving her a kiss!"

"Yes."

Taniguchi frowned. "That's kind of lame if you ask me. Suzumiya is a really hot girl. How about he has to fuck her instead?"

Nagato looked up at her boyfriend as if he were an alien from outer space.

"Awe come on. Don't give me that look! The whole kissing-the-princess thing has been way overdone!" Taniguchi emitted an evil chuckle. "Kyon's going to be pissed even if we have his character use a kiss to snap Suzumiya out of her dream. So why stop at first base like the rest of the world? Why don't we swing for the bleachers and let him hit a home run with the girl?"

Yuki Nagato shook her head with a smile. "You are a very interesting human." She squeezed his hand as they continued their walk.

* * *

Haruhi Suzumiya and Ryoko Asakura jogged side by side at a comfortable pace through the city's Southview Park.

"Why do you run so much?" Ryoko asked.

"I like how it feels when I'm moving," Haruhi replied. "I like how running keeps my body firm and fit. And I like being outside on a beautiful afternoon with somebody special."

Ryoko looked up and around - at the trees, the grass, the pond, her fellow park attendees. "Yes. This does feel really nice... It's invigorating."

Haruhi pointed at the apartment building in the distance. "I'd guess your place is about half a mile away. About two laps on the track."

Ryoko nodded. "That's about right."

"What do you say we race?" Haruhi pointed at her companion. "But you're not allowed to use any of your super speed or time dilation tricks."

"Okay. That sounds like fun. Though we'll both get really sweaty running that hard for that long."

Haruhi shot Ryoko a sly smile. "I'm counting on it." She winked. "We go on the count of three."

Ryoko nodded.

"THREE!" shouted Haruhi as she bolted down the path.

"CHEATER!" replied Ryoko as she chased the girl through the park.

* * *

Taniguchi and Nagato stepped off the train and walked out to the main road. The apartment building was five blocks away. As they strolled up the slight grade, Taniguchi pointed toward the park across the street, at two people in the distance.

"I think I know where your Brigade leader went after school," he said as he and Yuki watched Ryoko Asakura and Haruhi Suzumiya race toward the apartment building. Haruhi was leading by three steps.

The two stopped and observed as the girls sprinted toward the building at top speed. Ryoko Asakura was doing her best, making a last ditch effort to catch up; she almost closed the distance when Haruhi had to slow down to avoid a car while crossing the street. But Haruhi's hand touched the building's entrance door half a second before Ryoko's did.

* * *

"I win!" Haruhi jumped up and down before bending over and placing her hands on her knees, struggling to fill her lungs with air.

Ryoko, who had already spent some time bent over gasping, was the first to stand. "You cheated," she said between breaths with a wide smile.

"I know," Haruhi finally replied moments later. She tilted her head and winked. "And I'll let you punish me for that… if you really want to."

Ryoko stepped forward and took Haruhi in her arms. "I just might want to," she said.

The two girls smiled at each other, then embraced in a kiss.

* * *

"Damn," said Taniguchi as he watched two of the highest rated girls in North High lock lips. "We were right!" He squeezed his girlfriend's hand. The two stood back against the wall in the shadows, spying on the lovers, out of sight. "You know, watching those two go at it is getting me kind of worked up."

Nagato nodded. "Me, too."

* * *

"You have an awesome shower," Haruhi said as she held her arms high up over her head.

"You have an awesome body," replied Ryoko as she used a bar of soap to lather up Haruhi's breasts with one hand while rubbing the suds created over her skin with the other.

Haruhi turned her head up to the shower stream and took in a mouth full of water. She turned to Ryoko and, after giving her partner time to close her eyes, playfully spit the water into Ryoko's face.

"Showering together is the perfect activity for you," Haruhi remarked as Ryoko moved her hands down to wash Haruhi's belly. "Since you can't keep your hands off of me anyway, this way I get nice and clean in the process."

Ryoko gently turned the girl so she could wash her back. "You are so beautiful," she said as she reached a soapy hand down and slid it between the cheeks of Haruhi's firm bare bottom. "I'd give anything to have my penis back right now."

Haruhi wiggled her hips, and laughed out loud.

"Can I do your hair?" Ryoko asked. She lifted a bottle of shampoo with conditioner from the shelf.

Haruhi turned. "Sure." She looked at the bottle Ryoko was holding. "But that stuff won't work for me. Your hair is three times longer than mine, you know." Haruhi slid open the glass shower door and stepped one foot out into the bathroom. "I've got my stuff in my bag. It's just over there on your bed. I'll be right back."

"Wait." Ryoko lightly grasped Haruhi's arm. Haruhi turned... and was a little startled when she found herself lost in Ryoko's large, soft, but very serious eyes. "I love you, Haruhi Suzumiya," Ryoko said, with a warm genuine smile. Haruhi found herself wide eyed and speechless when Ryoko stepped forward and kissed her on the lips.

When their lips parted, Haruhi opened her eyes. "Okay," she said, looking down with embarrassed flushed cheeks. "Thank you." She glanced up at Ryoko, then at the bathroom door. "I'll be right back."

Ryoko nodded. Then sighed as she watched the beautiful soaking wet nude girl scamper away through the door, dripping water everywhere.

* * *

Yuki Nagato was naked and tightly bound spread eagle to her kitchen table, looking like the most erotic letter "X". She was lying on top of a white plastic table cloth – the two had long ago graduated from the comforter – trying her best to remain calm and breathe normally. But it wasn't working.

She looked up with frightened pensive eyes as Taniguchi approached her, a plastic spoon in one hand and a can of whipped cream in the other.

"There's no law that says you can't have dessert before dinner," Taniguchi said.

Yuki chirped and bucked gleefully when Taniguchi ran the spoon along her side, through her underarm, and over her bicep. The pit of her underarm was extremely sensitive.

Taniguchi squirted two large dollops of whipped cream over Yuki's full breasts; her nipples and areolas disappeared under two sugary mountains of the thick white dessert topping.

Between Yuki's spread legs, inches from her vagina, stood a bottle of chocolate syrup. Taniguchi slid two fingers inside of Yuki and teased her for a few moments, before retracting the slick fingers and rubbing their tips over Yuki's engorged clitoris. Yuki relaxed and moaned.

But she chirped loudly when Taniguchi pressed the edge of the spoon into the crease where her thigh and pubic region met. It was another one of Yuki's most sensitive places.

"You know what I think is so cool about you, Miss Nagato?" Taniguchi said as he turned the chocolate syrup bottle upside down and started coating Yuki's vagina with the brown sticky liquid. "You never complain when I'm teasing you." He scooped the tip of the whipped cream mountain covering Yuki's right breast with his spoon and moved it to her mouth.

Yuki wrapped her lips about the spoon and licked it clean.

"Okay, enough dessert for you! Now it's my turn!"

"Ohhhhmmmmmm!" Yuki gasped with glazed wide eyes when Taniguchi bent forward between her legs for a taste of his girlfriend. Her moans grew louder as Taniguchi continued devouring his dessert. "OH DAMN!" Taniguchi continued savoring his treat like the fine connoisseur he was, relishing each moan and spasm and expression of "OH DAMN!" his munching efforts generated.

Finally Yuki started bucking and writhing as an explosive orgasm wracked her bound body. "OHHHH OHHHH DAAAAMMMMMMNNNN!" she said several times before collapsing.

Taniguchi stood up and wiped a pleased chocolaty smile onto his sleeve. "You got that expression from me, didn't you?"

Yuki nodded.

"You said that the first time I made you come."

Yuki nodded again.

Taniguchi crossed his arms and smiled. "Well... I don't think there are any sweeter words in the world!"

"I love you."

"WHAAAAAAAAT?!"

Yuki smiled a tiny smile. "I love you."

"Whoa!" Taniguchi walked to the side of the table, sat down on it next to Yuki, and looked down into his helpless girlfriend's serious eyes. "Except for those words…" He laughed. "_Those_ are way sweeter." He bent forward and kissed Yuki on the lips.

Suddenly Yuki's eyes went wide with fright. "NO!" she shouted. "YOU CAN'T! NOT NOW!"

Taniguchi jumped off of the table when he looked up at Yuki's hands. They were dissolving! He looked down at her feet, which were dissolving as well!

"Yuki, what's going on?!"

Yuki lifted her head and looked into Taniguchi's eyes. Four rope loops were now resting on the table, empty, as her elbows and biceps reverted to sparkling evaporating particles.

"The Data Integration Thought Entity has terminated my connection to the collective."

"What? They cut the pipe? BUT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! IT'S JUST A STORY!" Taniguchi looked down in horror as Yuki's arms and legs turned into sparkling dust, then disappeared. "What can I do? HOW CAN WE STOP THIS?!"

Yuki's torso was disappearing. "Only one person can bring us back," she said as the disintegration reached her neck. The last words Yuki Nagato spoke before disappearing completely were, "The roof. Go to the roo-"

In shock, the color drained from his face, Taniguchi looked down at the kitchen table. All that remained of his girlfriend were two mounds of whipped cream and a puddle of chocolate syrup.

* * *

Haruhi Suzumiya walked through the bathroom door with a skip in her gait, and a small bottle of shampoo in her hand; she smiled when the steamy thick air hit her face. The smile changed to a curious expression when Haruhi looked through the shower's large glass door.

The water was running, but the shower was empty. She refocused her eyes on the glass surface. Four characters written in soap were liquefying before her eyes. She watched as the characters dissolved and joined the water flowing down the drain.

"Ryoko?"

Haruhi stepped into the shower, but it was just as empty from the inside as it had been from the outside.

"Ryoko? Where are you?"

The bathroom only had a single bedroom entrance and Haruhi hadn't left the bedroom. She checked the bathroom closet ... nothing ... and then the cabinets ... still nothing. She even looked in the medicine cabinet. But Ryoko Asakura was gone.

Haruhi jumped back into the shower and, as warm water ran off of her body, looked out the glass door, at the place where the soapy symbols, now long gone, had been written.

"R. O. O. F."

What the hell did that mean?


	13. R O O F

.

**Chapter 13: R. O. O. F.**

* * *

Taniguchi looked down at the grey silicone material coating the roof of Yuki's apartment building, surprised that he hadn't yet worn a path through it to the cement beneath.

"Where are you, Yuki?!" he said loudly once again as he turned to make his one hundred and twenty-fourth trip from one side of the building to the other. "Who the hell am I supposed to meet here?! WHO THE HELL IS GOING TO BRING YOU BACK?!"

Taniguchi looked up into the sky. The sun had set moments before he'd set foot on the bland, vent-covered roof. The roof access shed was the only structure jutting out of the building's otherwise flat and unremarkable summit. He felt his unease increasing as a cold darkness blanketed the city. The moon, but one-quarter full, peeked in and out of the ashen clouds.

At last he heard a sound coming from the access shed, now at the far corner from his position. Haruhi Suzumiya pushed the door forward and stepped out into the night, dressed in her school uniform and cardigan jacket; her hair with its yellow ribbon in place, both still a little damp. She noticed a shape at the far end of the roof and started walking toward it. "Ryoko? Is that you?"

Taniguchi walked toward roof's latest visitor. "No. It's me. Taniguchi."

Haruhi walked toward Taniguchi and chuckled. "Out for a romantic tryst on the roof with your honey, huh?" She looked around. "Where's Yuki?"

"SHE DISAPPEARED! YUKI FUCKING DISAPPEARED! SHE TURNED TO DUST AND EVAPORATED - RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES!"

"What?" Haruhi stopped in front of Taniguchi. "Get a hold of yourself! People don't just evaporate!" But then Haruhi's eyes slowly widened as she paused to consider his words. "Did you see Ryoko Asakura up here?"

"Why? Did she disappear, too?"

Haruhi shrugged. "I can't find her. One minute we were together. Then I left for a minute. And when I came back she was gone. I've been looking everywhere for her. Her phone and keys were still in the apartment and the door was locked. I checked her apartment, her floor, the laundry room and the mail room. She left a strange message… sort of… I think it said 'roof'. So here I am."

"Yuki told me to go to the roof, too. It was the last thing she said before she…" Taniguchi shook his head. "It didn't happen! It couldn't have happened! BUT SHE'S GONE! SHE JUST FUCKING DISAPPEARED!"

"And Yuki told you to come to the roof?"

Taniguchi nodded. "That's right. She said there was only one person who could bring her back. Then she told me to go to the roof."

Haruhi took a deep breath and crossed her arms over her chest. "This may sound like a stupid question, but you _do_ know that Yuki Nagato is … special … don't you?"

"What do you mean?"

"She's an alien."

Taniguchi's mouth dropped open. "Huh?"

"You never had a clue?" Haruhi asked. "She never gave you any sort of hint that she was different? You know, like that she was an alien?"

"Not really." Taniguchi shook his head. "Except for the times when she told me she was one … which was pretty much, well, continually. _But that was bullshit!_ She was just making that up! It was a sci-fi role-playing game that we played! It wasn't real!"

"So people turn to dust and evaporate on you pretty often then?"

Taniguchi stood there with his mouth wide open. He turned to Haruhi. "She said Ryoko was an alien, too… in our story."

Haruhi nodded. "She is. For real."

"What the fuck?"

Haruhi looked up at the sky, then around the perimeter of the building. "So Yuki told you that we're supposed to meet somebody here? Someone who can help?"

Taniguchi nodded. "That's what she said. Yuki doesn't joke around about that type of thing… Actually she doesn't really joke about anything." Taniguchi smiled… before taking a deep despondent breath and putting his hands over his face. "OH SHIT! SHE'S GONE! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?"

Haruhi grabbed the lapels of Taniguchi's jacket and looked him in the eyes. "Listen carefully, Taniguchi!" She shook him. "Do I have your attention?!" Taniguchi nodded. "That stuff isn't going to help us right now. You get to feel sorry for yourself later!" Haruhi released Taniguchi and waved her arm across the roof. "Ryoko and Yuki knew what they were doing. We're out here for a reason. _And we're going to get them back!"_

"How?"

Haruhi crossed her arms over her chest and assumed the commander's pose. "Here's what we're going to do. First of all, we're going to sit and wait for this _person_ to show up. And while we're waiting, we're not just going to sit around on our thumbs. We're going to figure this thing out! You got that?!"

Taniguchi nodded. Haruhi walked over to the waist-high safety wall left of the roof access door and sat back against it. Taniguchi sat down next to her.

"I need to know what you know," Haruhi said. "Every detail matters so don't hold out on me. Tell me exactly what happened to Yuki."

"Seriously? _Every _detail?"

Haruhi turned toward Taniguchi. Her fearless determined eyes hit him like a cold glass of water in the face. "Everything."

"Well… I was having Yuki for dessert," he started. As Taniguchi shared his tale, Haruhi shook her head and tried her best not to laugh.

"Okay then," she said after he finished. "You turned an SOS Brigade member into a chocolate sundae?"

Taniguchi shrugged. "She wasn't complaining. And I made her come like a freight train!"

"Did she do anything or say anything… unusual?"

"Not really. She has this really cute way of saying 'Oh damn' when she's climaxing and that's about it." Taniguchi's eyes lit up. "But this time it _was_ different." He smiled. "She said something to me that she'd never said before."

"Well?"

"She said 'I love you.' Twice. It really floored me."

Haruhi straightened as if her hair had been yanked up.

"What?" Taniguchi asked. "If you know something you've got to tell me all the details, too!"

Haruhi took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay. I was in the shower with Ryoko."

Taniguchi nodded with a sly smile. "Was it really steamy and hot in there and did you get your naked bodies all lathered up and stuff?"

Haruhi gave Taniguchi the evil eye, then made a fist and cocked it back.

Taniguchi shrugged. "Sorry."

Haruhi giggled. "Yes, Ryoko _did_ lather me up pretty good. She was just about to do my hair with her shampoo but then I decided to get my shampoo instead because it was better for short hair. My shampoo bottle was in the bedroom. Before I could get out of the shower, though, Ryoko grabbed my arm and told me she loved me. She tells me that all the time - just like all you guys do - but this time it was different. I could tell that she really meant it. And it kind of floored me, too. … When I came back to the shower, she was gone."

"Wait," said Taniguchi. "I'm pretty good with this story stuff. I'm thinking the Data Integration Thought Entity wasn't liking the prospect of losing two of their constituents to us humans and they took action. That's how I'd write it. The girls obviously threw a switch of some sort when they confessed to us."

Haruhi nodded. "That makes sense." She held out her arms. "But why did all this happen in the first place? Why the virus? Why their change?"

Taniguchi laughed. "Well if you were to go by our story, it happened because _you wanted it to happen._ That's how Yuki always shaped the story… which is up to chapter thirteen right now I might add. We made you into this goddess sort of being that has the ability to mold reality into whatever she wants. And you're always wanting something cool and different and out of the ordinary to happen - so those things happen. Though most of the time you're not aware you're causing it.

"I have to give Yuki the credit for that part. She put it in to fill a story gap. You see, I wondered why you, a normal human girl, were able to knock Ryoko Asakura out with a single right hook to the jaw. After all, she was supposed to be this super tough alien being and all. You should have broken your fist on her jaw. At the least she could have dodged your punch with her super speed, right? Yuki came up with you being some sort of goddess as an explanation."

Haruhi looked at her fist with a confused expression. "You're right. How _could_ I do that? Twice… To her?"

"Twice?" Taniguchi asked.

Haruhi nodded. "Twice. Once after she got on my case for changing before all the guys left… and the second time when she was about stab Kyon."

"WHAAAAAAAAT?! That was real?! Ryoko really tried to kill Kyon?!"

"Yuki told you?"

"Yeah! But as part of our story! That's what gave me the idea to tie her to her kitchen table. Holey moley! That really happened?! You tied Ryoko to the bed?! Naked?!"

Haruhi shrugged with reddening cheeks. "I never thought to add whipped cream and chocolate syrup, though." Haruhi turned to Taniguchi and changed the subject. "We've been out here for quite a while now and it's getting colder. When is this mystery person going to show up?"

Taniguchi's mind was in another place altogether. "So you did it. You really knocked out Ryoko. Then…" He turned to Haruhi. "Hey. Did you ever have a dream, one that seemed totally real, one that you remember like it happened yesterday, where you were in an alternate universe with Kyon, and only Kyon, and a bunch of blue monsters called shinjin?"

Haruhi's mouth dropped open and the color drained from her face. "How do you know about that?" Then she whispered, _"No way. That was real?"_

"According to Yuki, you created this reality she called closed space. It encompassed North High. At one point the shinjin were destroying everything around the two of you. Then Kyon kissed you to snap you out of it – to shut down the closed space."

Haruhi's face suddenly flushed bright red and she hugged herself. She turned away from Taniguchi.

Taniguchi picked up on it right away. "Kyon didn't just kiss you, did he?" He put his hand on Haruhi's shoulder. "Come on. Tell me the details. That's our deal."

"Yes… I remember it like it was yesterday." Haruhi turned back to Taniguchi. "I was really upset this one day. I was in a foul mood. More than anything I just wanted things to be _different!_ And I sort of got jealous when I saw Mikuru and Kyon playing around. I wanted the world to be a more interesting place… and I guess I wanted it to be that way with Kyon in it… I wanted him all to myself.

"We ended up at North High. It was just me and him. I explored the place, every floor, every classroom, everywhere! It was just us. And these big blue monsters! But they didn't scare me. Because I knew they were mine. They were going to help me wipe out the old stuff and make things new.

"But Kyon stopped me. He told me he liked things the way they were and that he'd miss the people in the old universe. To be honest, I really didn't care. But then he told me how hot he thought I looked with a ponytail… And he kissed me."

"And you woke up?"

Haruhi giggled. "Like hell I woke up! Before you know it we were ripping off each others clothes and doing it right there in the grass. Then I ran off and he chased me into the school. We did about every sexually perverted thing you could think of, something new and different in each room. It was wild!" Haruhi's face was glowing. "After we did it in a room, those shinjin monsters would destroy that room so we wouldn't repeat it. I couldn't believe all the cool stuff Kyon was coming up with."

Taniguchi laughed and pointed his thumb at his chest. "That would be me. I lent him my 'Tomika Does Tokyo' DVD last year. It's really hot."

"He fucked me in the cafeteria, in the gym, in home room, in the nurse's office… After we left, the shinjin would wipe it out. And we never got tired!"

"Did he do that thing where you're leaning back in a leather easy chair with your arms up and your legs spread wide open over the armrests?"

Haruhi nodded. "Teacher's lounge."

"So when did your dream end?"

"When we ran out of rooms! By then I was done for. I told Kyon he could keep his universe. I wanted to go back to my bed."

"I KNEW IT!" Taniguchi proudly did a fist pump. "GRAND SLAM HOME RUN! WAY TO GO, MY MAN KYON!"

"Wow," Haruhi said with warm glassy eyes. "We were both totally wiped out the next morning. When I got up… I could barely walk. But I wanted to see Kyon… I wanted him to see my ponytail." She giggled. "He was as wiped out as I was. I figured it was one of those nights, a full moon or something, when everyone just had a rough night with crazy dreams." She shook her head. "I never suspected in a million years that the dream was… _real._"

Taniguchi didn't know why, but he felt very comfortable resting his hand on Haruhi's shoulder. "Miss Suzumiya," he said. "When Yuki sent me to the roof to find the only person that could bring her back, she didn't send me to find some mystery person…

"She sent me here to find you."


	14. Closed Space

.

**Chapter 14: Closed Space**

* * *

Haruhi rose from her seat and turned to watch the flashing crescent moon moments before it dove back behind the clouds. "What am _I_ supposed to do?"

Taniguchi stood up next to her. "I don't know. You're the goddess. Can't you just make a wish or something?"

Haruhi laughed. "You know how crazy that sounds don't you? This is all… too much!" Haruhi hugged herself. "First of all, I'm still having a hard time believing Ryoko's really gone. Maybe she just went to the store or something. She could have gotten past me with one of her time dilation tricks when I blinked. She's resourceful that way."

"What about Yuki?"

"You imagined that! People don't just disintegrate!" Haruhi stomped her foot. "Look Taniguchi, I'm nobody special!" She pointed at the door. "Somebody's going to show up in a minute to tell you that!"

Taniguchi turned toward Haruhi and grabbed her shoulders. "LISTEN TO ME SUZUMIYA!" he said as he shook her. He pointed up at the sky. "THOSE DATA INTEGRATION THOUGHT ENTITY BASTARDS TOOK MY YUKI! AND THEY TOOK _YOUR_ RYOKO! AND YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING HELP ME GET THEM BACK!"

Haruhi looked down. "I can't."

"Yuki knew what she was doing. Somehow she and Ryoko knew they had to get us together for this. Here, on the roof! There's no other explanation."

Haruhi looked up at him with a blank despondent stare. "You're wrong."

Taniguchi took a deep breath. "Wait!" He rummaged through his jacket pockets. "Damn! How could I have been so stupid to forget this?" He found a stick of gum… two coins… then he felt plastic crunching – that was it! "I have something." Taniguchi retrieved a plastic-wrapped fortune cookie from his pocket, a recently purchased treat from the Ling Chong Chinese Restaurant. "Yuki knew you'd have troubles believing." He held out his hand. "That's why she gave me this."

Haruhi studied the object. "A fortune cookie?"

"It's not just any fortune cookie. It's special. In our story, when you ate this cookie it activated your powers."

"Oh, bullshit!"

"That's what I thought, too," Taniguchi countered. "But the stories have all been true!" He counted his fingers. "Yuki being an alien. Ryoko being an alien. Your closed-space adventure with Kyon."

Haruhi groaned. She took the cookie and held it in her hand. "How did it work? I don't actually remember stimulating any kind of magical powers with a cookie before, either in my dreams or in real life."

Taniguchi shrugged. "How should I know? A few hours ago I was fat, dumb and happy, walking next to Yuki, thinking we were brainstorming ideas for a fictional story we were creating. Then those bastards..." Taniguchi clenched his fists and set them on the safety wall. "Let me ask you something, Suzumiya?"

"What?"

"Do you believe that this Data Asshole Entity took Yuki?"

Haruhi paused, then nodded. "Yes, I think I believe you."

"And do you believe they took Ryoko?"

Haruhi nodded.

"And how does that make _you_ feel?" he asked. "Because it's really pissing me off!"

Haruhi's eyes revealed her rising anger as she seriously pondered the question for the first time. Resting her hands on the wall, she turned toward the horizon and took several deep breaths; looking straight ahead, her posture improving, Taniguchi sensed Haruhi's resolve strengthening with each exhalation.

"I want her back!" she finally said.

"And what if those Data Motherfuckers don't want to give her back?"

There was murder in Haruhi's eyes when she turned to Taniguchi and shouted, "I WANT RYOKO BACK!"

"AND WHAT IF THEY DON'T WANT TO GIVE HER BACK?!"

"THEN THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS MESSED WITH THE WRONG SCHOOLGIRL!"

Haruhi ripped open the package and stuffed the fortune cookie in her mouth. She chomped on it and swallowed it down, almost whole. Then, with her fist raised, shaking it at the world, she shouted:

"I … WANT … HER … BACK!"

Suddenly the sky cracked open and fell away like a broken egg shell; pieces of it crashed down onto the ground to reveal a brighter hazy grey dome beyond. As the sky's quality changed, the night's harsh darkness surrendered to the dome's more pleasant ambient lighting. The city also disappeared; buildings and streets vanished, all replaced by a reddish maroon sand cloud that pleasingly complimented the light grey sky dome above. When the dust settled, the apartment building was the only structure standing; a lone monument punctuating the red desert below the center of the sunless dome.

"HOLY SHIT!" Taniguchi turned and stood next to Haruhi. "You did it. ... What is this place?"

"There they are." Haruhi pointed toward a silhouette of a black tower barely visible in the distance jutting out over the horizon. "Come on! It's time to kick some Data Integration butt."

Haruhi walked toward the access door. Taniguchi followed her down to the top floor hallway. The elevator door opened as she approached. Seconds later, Haruhi and Taniguchi stepped out on the ground floor. They walked out the exit door and stood in front of the building on the sidewalk. Beyond the sidewalk their world had been transformed into a sea of red sand as far as the eye could see. There was no wind, no sound; there wasn't another soul in sight.

"Was this what your closed space with Kyon was like?" Taniguchi asked.

Haruhi nodded. "Not exactly." She turned to Taniguchi. "But I know this place. I've been here before." She paused and looked around. "This is my world."

Haruhi started walking toward the tower. Taniguchi ran up next to her. "When Yuki talked about this Data Entity, she said it was some sort of ethereal astral existence or something. Like it wasn't even solid. Just something hanging out in outer space."

Haruhi pointed at the tower. "It's right over there."

"But how?"

"Because that's where they are."

Taniguchi looked over at his companion. She didn't seem to be in a very talkative mood. "So wait. You created this universe, just like you created the one at North High. And you brought the Data Integration Thought Entity into it, just like you brought Kyon into the other one." Taniguchi laughed. "Damn, Miss Suzumiya. You really are incredible."

Haruhi continued walking undaunted, a girl with a purpose, while Taniguchi tried to make sense of it all.

He continued, "You know that the fortune cookie story I told you was bullshit, right? I just made the whole thing up."

Haruhi nodded and turned her eyes toward Taniguchi. "Yeah. Thanks for that. I guess I just needed a little push. I'm okay now."

Taniguchi shook his head. "Well, it's a good thing I had that cookie in my pocket."

"I wonder where the cookie came from?" Haruhi asked - inducing Taniguchi to shake his head and laugh again.

Taniguchi looked down at his feet as they walked toward the horizon, analyzing the sand's pale, non-reflective red hue. He kicked a divot into the ground and lifted his foot. The sand particles cleanly rolled off his shoe. "I feel different in here," he said. "Like I'm not using any energy to get around. It's strange."

"You get used to it."

"Thanks for letting me experience this with you, Miss Suzumiya."

"You have as big a stake in this as I do. We're going to get them back."

"How much longer do we have to walk? That tower looks like it's still ten miles away."

"It's an enormous complex," Haruhi replied. "This Data Integration Thought Entity is huge."

As they approached, Taniguchi noticed other smaller black structures jutting out over the horizon adjacent to the soaring central tower. It brought to mind the Tokyo cityscape, except all the buildings were black. Diffuse white light emanating from the center line of the tower and the surrounding buildings glowed and pulsated.

"Hey, couldn't we just fly there if we wanted? You run this place, right?"

Haruhi laughed. "You sure ask a lot of questions." She turned toward him. "Look. I don't know why, but I know that this is the way I need to do this. This is what feels right to me. This is what I want. I don't know any better way to explain it to you than that."

Taniguchi nodded. Then he sprinted up ahead, off to the side, and around the girl, who maintained her deliberate constant pace. "It's like it's not taking any effort to do this at all." He noticed Haruhi was giving him a strange look. "I'm sorry Miss Suzumiya. But I was just thinking about the time you spent in closed space with Kyon… and how you two never got tired. How were the orgasms in there?"

Haruhi frowned. "Is sex all you think about, Taniguchi?"

"Yeah. It pretty much dominates my thinking." He gave Haruhi a stern look. "And don't think every eighteen year old guy in the world isn't wired just like me! I just have less trouble embracing my inner pervert."

"You remind me of Ryoko." Haruhi laughed and shook her head. "Yes. The orgasms rocked. And they kept getting better and better." She chuckled. "I guess Kyon and I could have managed a few more rooms if we really wanted to. I think about that all the time."

"Do you love Kyon?"

Haruhi shot a sharp glance at Taniguchi. "Why does everybody ask me that?"

Taniguchi chose not to pursue the topic.


	15. Black City

.

**Chapter 15: Black City**

* * *

Taniguchi wasn't sure how long he and Haruhi Suzumiya had been walking. It could have been a day or it could have been five minutes. In the same way he effortlessly moved about in this space, time seemed to pass just as effortlessly. It was almost as if the red sand they strode on sat atop a conveyor belt. Suzumiya hadn't been that talkative. Though she wasn't silent, her focus was on the mission; which left Taniguchi alone to explore the incredible universe he'd been pulled in to.

An apartment building… a red sand desert… and a gleaming black city pulsating with light and data; at least he assumed it was data. Yuki had described the Data Integration Thought Entity on several occasions. Taniguchi now wished he'd paid closer attention.

The space made sense in the sanest sort of way. The apartment building was the starting point. The desert was a bland, nondescript barrier separating the starting point and the goal. And the city, this massive black city… it _was _the Data Integration Thought Entity.

And it was Haruhi's guest, though Taniguchi wondered if the Entity was aware of this.

The desert gave way to streets darkened by the shade of the imposing structures lining them. They were smooth black glass-coated thoroughfares similar in width to normal streets with evenly spaced rows of fiber optic threads as thick as his arm running beneath them. The threads glowed and pulsated; Taniguchi assumed the pulses were driven by data flow. After all, data was what this entity's life blood.

As the two traversed the city's arteries, Taniguchi made a mental note of the different types of structures that lined their path, cataloguing at least four distinct types besides the massive tower at the city's center.

The first type Taniguchi cataloged as skyscrapers; massive buildings he assumed to be analogous to central processing centers. Adhering to the prevailing motif, the buildings were black with a transparent coating of some sort, possibly glass. The building's pulsating white data spines, one running up the center of each of its four faces, branched out symmetrically like digital trees. With a footprint that covered a city block, Taniguchi surmised that these massive structures housed the units that analyzed, crunched, rearranged and even created data.

Massive lower profile warehouse buildings covering several blocks he catalogued as storage centers; the places from which data was retrieved and to which it was stored once analyzed.

Taniguchi catalogued the medium height star shaped buildings, fashioned from stacks of single-story width triangles laid over triangles, as the switching centers responsible for routing data through the substreet fiber network. Concave dishes atop these structures probably beamed information to satellite locations.

At the outskirts of the city lay massive cylinders each the length of several soccer fields, halfway submerged into the ground, their ends swirling like a massive Hostess Ho-Ho cut in half and pressed into a black counter. Though the entire city buzzed with energy, these structures emitted the most noise; a low frequency hum. Taniguchi recognized them as power centers.

Several off-colored buildings seemed randomly strewn into the mix. Still black but with a unique tint in their transparent coating, the colors of these structures ran the gamut. Some were green, some red, some blue, some yellow, some purple. These were special purpose locations that were tasked with… Taniguchi had no idea. He surmised one such structure may have been where Ryoko Asakura and Yuki Nagato had been given their human bodies. One of these buildings might even be a prison where the two were quarantined right now. That is, if they still existed.

Taniguchi was confident they did exist. He absorbed much of his confidence from Haruhi Suzumiya, who seemed to have no trouble at all navigating the path to the central tower. Yes, the tower was her goal; he was sure of it.

What a beautiful metropolis, though. The entire city was amazing. Its perfect design and symmetry; this was so much more than any human or group of humans could ever create. Yet Taniguchi sensed that this wasn't the Data Integration Thought Entity's true form.

When "invited" into Haruhi's space, had they chosen this as the way they wanted to represent themselves? Had Haruhi Suzumiya chosen it?

Taniguchi shrugged. Did it even matter? This massive universe traversing astral entity was here now. And one very pissed off eighteen year old schoolgirl, no larger than a flea egg on an elephant's back by comparison, was making her way to the heart of this colossal entity with the professed goal of kicking its butt.

Taniguchi shook his head. Only Haruhi Suzumiya could pull off something like this... He was surprised that he wasn't that surprised at all.

But why was _he_ here? Why wasn't Taniguchi back on the roof in that other space; the one he associated with reality – though he understood that this place was as real as it got. But why did Haruhi Suzumiya bring _him_ along? She may not have done it consciously, but she did bring him. What was his purpose? Taniguchi had a feeling he'd soon find out.

When they finally arrived at the tower, Taniguchi's mouth dropped open. The structure had looked impressive from a distance, but now, standing right in front of the damn thing… Its base easily covered twenty city blocks, maybe more! Looking up toward its peak… It had to be a mile high!

Haruhi Suzumiya stopped in front of the entrance and crossed her arms. She turned to Taniguchi. "I feel a little better now. The walk did me good." She tilted her head slightly. "I was thinking about what you said before, about how the girls confessing might have thrown a switch or something. And I'm willing to give this entity the benefit of the doubt. Love is a crazy emotion. It might not be something they're used to out in space."

"Wait a minute," Taniguchi said. "Just so I'm sure I'm following you here. You're willing to forgive and understand this thing, these things, this collective, whatever the hell this is… and let them have Ryoko and Yuki?"

"I didn't say that. I'm just willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. Don't misunderstand me… We're not leaving this place without them." Haruhi turned toward the entrance.

Two automatic doors, looking similar to those found at a grocery store but moving glass panes far more massive, slid open as the two approached. The two stepped through the doors and into a cavernous lobby. Its size reminded Taniguchi of the Tokyo Dome, though this was a square version of it without seats. At the center of the lobby, at the bottom of a square shaped shaft reaching down from the ceiling to the floor, waited an elevator. Taniguchi was not surprised when the doors opened as they approached.

The doors closed after the two stepped in. As the car rocketed skyward, Taniguchi noticed that the elevator's walls were transparent. "This place is amazing," he said. "The whole city is."

Haruhi looked out and around. "Yeah, this really is a pretty cool place. Very futuristic."

When they cleared the lobby ceiling the elevator seemed to move through a more conventional elevator shaft. "This tower is the control center," Taniguchi said as they sped upward past bank after bank of flashing logical processing units joined by fiber connections.

There seemed to be no end to the place, but eventually the elevator slowed and came to a halt at the top floor. Haruhi and Taniguchi stepped out into the command center.

"Holy shit," Taniguchi said as he scanned the place. Once again the two found themselves in a cavernous room, though this one sat atop the tower. The grey boundary of Haruhi's closed space was clearly visible above through the tinted glass dome ceiling. The ceiling curved down smoothly to create the walls of immense circular room. The walls of the room from the floor to several stories high were covered with countless arena-sized seamlessly interconnected view screens. This data center made Houston's Mission Control look like an outhouse in Taniguchi's back yard by comparison.

Taniguchi walked toward the wall. Each display seemed to have its special purpose, exhibiting data in various ways; some displayed scrolling lines of code, others oscilloscope-like pulses, others rotating three dimensional graphs. Most showed data in a way that left Taniguchi clueless. He chuckled. It would probably look like a children's book to Yuki.

Seeming totally unimpressed, Haruhi Suzumiya turned full circle and scanned the area. When she spotted what she was looking for, she walked deliberately toward it. When Taniguchi saw what she saw, he immediately jogged to Haruhi's side.

It took about a minute of walking at a firm steady pace to reach the control counter; a surface so large you could park a truck on it. Seated at this counter in a standard office rolling chair was a tall thin Asian dude sporting an unkempt mop of shoulder length hair that partially hid intense brown eyes. He wore jeans and a blue baseball shirt - number 42 with the name JULIAN printed in large white letters over the numbers. He didn't seem to notice his visitors when Haruhi stepped to his left and Taniguchi stepped up to his right.

Julian sat behind an impressive six monitor display, two rows of three, one row seamlessly set atop the other. Though not arena-sized, Taniguchi reckoned that each view screen could handily display a life-sized image of a standing person. Julian was typing furiously on a large recessed keyboard; Taniguchi recognized none of its keys.

The typists fingers were a blur; the bottom left screen displayed the fruit of his efforts as it filled with unintelligible lines of white code over a blue background. As he smacked the ENTER key with authority, the screen flashed in time with another view screen two hundred yards away, swapping its contents. Julian acknowledged the event with a pleased nod before reaching forward for a 64 ounce plastic cup of orange soda and taking a refreshing swig. "Ahhhh," he said, before turning his focus to new data filling the bottom left display. Satisfied with what he saw, he turned to the screen at the bottom right.

Taniguchi studied the view screen that now had Julian's rapt attention and laughed when he recognized it. "He's playing Kantai Collection!" he said to Haruhi as he pointed at the display. "It's one of my favorite online games. World War II naval warships are depicted as cute girls that obliterate each other in battle!"

Haruhi shook her head. "Why am I not surprised?"

"There's actually a good chance I might have played against this guy on one of the servers!"

Haruhi Suzumiya sighed, then resumed what she was doing; patiently standing still with her arms crossed, politely giving Julian some time to acknowledge her.

Taniguchi crossed his arms over his chest as well, and studied the rest of Julian's setup. It looked pretty cool. From his rolling command chair Julian could pull up any of the thousands of screens in the control center and provide attention where it was needed.

"YES!" Julian said with a fist pump as a two dimensional explosion on his game screen informed him he'd sunk an opponent's ship. He took another swig of orange soda.

Finally Haruhi tapped Julian on the shoulder. "Excuse me."

Julian ignored the taps. Another screen popped up front top center. He switched his focus to it, then typed some code and sent it off with another smack of his ENTER key.

Haruhi tapped again, this time a bit more firmly. "Excuse me."

Julian groaned and brushed off his shoulder.

Haruhi growled in response. Taniguchi could see the anger building in her eyes. But she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. After a short pause, she opened her eyes and firmly smacked the guy on the shoulder three times, shaking him a bit as she did. "EXCUSE ME!"

Julian turned to Haruhi and looked up with an extremely irked expression. "Quit bothering me, you annoying bitch! Can't you see that I'm busy?!"

Taniguchi winced. "That was the wrong thing to say," he muttered under his breath.

Haruhi pulled Julian's chair out and spun it about so she faced him. She reached down, grabbed two handfuls of Julian's baseball shirt at the chest, and bodily lifted him out of his chair up on to his feet.

"I want my friends back," she said coldly and evenly, holding him upright with one hand, while cocking her other hand back into a fist that hovered menacingly above her shoulder. "And I want them back now. If you don't return them to me right away, you're not going to like what happens next."


	16. Communication Breakdown

.

**Chapter 16: Communication Breakdown  
**

* * *

The console operator clearly looked frightened as he stared at Haruhi's fist.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" he shouted. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE ME ALONE! I HAVE WORK TO DO!"

"I WANT THEM BACK!" A furious Haruhi shouted.

"SUZUMIYA, WAIT!" Taniguchi walked over to the girl and put his hand over her fist. "Hang on a minute. I think I know what's going on."

Haruhi turned toward Taniguchi, looked into his eyes for a few moments, and dropped her fist.

"Let him go," Taniguchi said.

Haruhi gave Taniguchi an annoyed look, but she dropped Julian.

Julian blinked several times. He evaluated Haruhi with a perplexed expression, then glanced over at Taniguchi. "Crazy bitch." He brushed himself off and sat down in his chair. His focus returned to the top center view screen.

Haruhi crossed her arms. "What?!"

Taniguchi walked away from Julian's workstation and motioned for Haruhi to follow him. Once they'd walked a short distance, he turned to her. "Yuki explained a few things about the Data Integration Thought Entity and if what she told me is true, I think you may be going about this the wrong way."

Though still visibly angry, Haruhi took a deep breath and said, "Okay. I'm listening."

"The reason they sent Yuki and Ryoko down to Earth in the first place was because they needed an interface to communicate with humans. As you know, as much as we love them, the humanoid interfaces they provided us weren't totally free of issues. The problem is that they don't process the universe the way we do. Yuki once told me that this Entity doesn't even use language to communicate." Taniguchi put out his arms. "I have no doubt that the directive you issued - however you do that - brought you directly to the person responsible for taking Ryoko and Yuki from us ... But this guy's _tech support!_"

"Are we dealing with the wrong guy?" Haruhi asked.

"No. I don't think the power you control is capable of a mistake like that. You know exactly what you want - and Julian here is the guy that can provide it. _But he's got absolutely no human social skills!_"

"Well that's not _too_ different from the computer nerds I'm familiar with," Haruhi replied with a sarcastic smile.

"Let me try and talk to him for a minute."

Haruhi nodded and the two walked back toward the computer station, resuming their positions on either side of the computer nerd.

Taniguchi rested his hand on the back of Julian's chair and set his other hand on the counter. He bent forward and spoke directly into Julian's ear. "Julian. We want our friends back. Humanoid interfaces Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura."

Julian was typing furiously again, throwing code up onto the screen with incredible competence. "I know why you're here." He reached to his right and hit a large hexagonal key several times, moving the keyboard's focus to another view screen. "But it's impossible. They're defective." He continued typing.

Taniguchi nodded and stood up straight.

"Are you going to explain the concept of love to him?" Haruhi asked.

"No. Something tells me that would be a waste of time." Taniguchi motioned toward the sea of screens. "How can you represent something like love in a rotating 3D graph?"

Haruhi glared at the back of Julian's head. "Does he understand the concept of survival?"

Taniguchi laughed. "I'm sure every sentient being understands that. Did you see his face after you yanked him out of his seat? I think he knows exactly who he's dealing with." Taniguchi stepped back and walked toward Haruhi. "If you did wipe out this Thought Entity, and I have no doubt you're capable of that, would you be able to save Yuki and Ryoko?"

"I don't know." Haruhi shook her head. "I don't think so."

"This is an ancient being. If what Yuki told me was true, there could be billions of souls in this collective. They don't exist the way we do, in a bodily form. In the same way we live our lives in our heads through what we take in with our senses, they live in this astral digital Entity, represented by this amazing city. And let's not forget, they recently fought off a nasty virus that originated on Earth. We shouldn't be surprised by their antagonism."

Haruhi put her hands on her hips and with a determined look said, "We're getting them back."

Taniguchi nodded. "I believe that." He chuckled. "In fact I have no doubt about it. I think that's why I'm here. For some reason we had to come here as a team to accomplish this."

"Okay," Haruhi said, nodding her head in agreement. "So what's our game plan… partner?"

"I think I know what will work," Taniguchi replied. "But it won't be pretty. Here's what I think we should do."

Haruhi shook her head and laughed when she heard Taniguchi's plan.

* * *

Haruhi walked over to her usual spot at Julian's left. She bent forward and tapped him on the shoulder.

"WHAT?!" Julian jerked back with wide eyes. "DON'T HIT ME!"

"I want my friends back."

This time Julian gave Haruhi his attention. "That's impossible. Now leave me alone!"

"Why can't I have them back?"

"They're defective. They'll contaminate the system." Julian looked into Haruhi's calm eyes for a few moments before turning back to the work at hand. "Leave me alone and go away."

Haruhi straightened and crossed her arms.

Suddenly a siren sounded. Several of the screens in the room flashed to life. Julian's top left view screen switched to security camera mode, displaying a live video feed that focused on one of the power stations.

"What the fuck?" Julian looked up at the screen with wide disbelieving eyes as an enormous blue monster raised its fists overhead and then brought them crashing down on top of the half-circle building, reducing a large portion of it to rubble. A secondary explosion filled the screen before the shinjin raised its arms for a second strike.

"I want my friends back."

Julian looked up at Haruhi with an expression of horror, then back at the screen. The shinjin's massive fists came down like a sledgehammer, pulverizing another section of the power station. BABBOOOM! The far end of the complex was obliterated in another blinding explosion. Debris shot out toward the screen and seemed to hit the camera, turning the image to static.

The static image was instantly replaced by a feed from another angle.

"I can do this all day," Haruhi said.

"STOP IT!" Julian screamed. He got up out of his chair and faced Haruhi. "STOP IT!"

"I want my friends back."

"THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! CONTAMINATION! IMPOSSIBLE!" He pointed to the screen, nearly crying as the shinjin continued reducing the power station to rubble. "STOP IT!" A section of screens in the dome went dark.

"Please return Ryoko Asakura and Yuki Nagato."

"I CAN'T DO THAT! THEY HAVE LOGIC ISSUES! THEY WILL CONTAMINATE THE SYSTEM! STOP IT AND GO AWAY!"

Julian looked on helplessly as the schoolgirl took a seat on the counter next to his keyboard. Haruhi crossed her legs and tapped her finger on one of the keyboard's keys. "You're really good with this thing. I don't know a lot about computers but you seem like a total whiz kid. I'm sure there's something you could do." She motioned with her head toward Taniguchi. "My friend here thinks you could rig up some sort of a digital filter in our friends' data connection if you really wanted to."

"We don't do that. It's against protocol."

Haruhi nodded. "I see."

Suddenly another siren wailed. The top right view screen switched to security camera mode. It showed a shinjin in the process of obliterating one of the star-shaped communications and routing centers. The color drained from Julian's face. "NO!"

"I can do this... _all_ _day._"

Julian looked at the screen. Then he looked at Haruhi for a few moments.

"I want my friends back," Haruhi said. "Now."

Julian jumped back into his seat and started typing furiously. "Got to reroute power. Rerouting data." After several minutes it looked like he was back in the saddle. Several of the room's dark screens came back to life.

Then... another siren. The center top screen popped up showing a shinjin taking out the side of a processing skyscraper with one swing of its arm.

"NO!" Julian screamed. "STOP IT! RIGHT NOW!" The three bottom view screens sprang to life, displaying numerous scrolling columns of code. But instead of scrolling them over a blue background, the background was red.

"Where are you going to route from when everything's rubble?" Haruhi asked.

"Uh..." Julian stared at the most recent security screen with blank eyes. He didn't have an answer.

Julian winced as the monster prepared to take a second swing at the building - but it stopped up short. Haruhi slid off of the counter and grabbed Julian's shirt. She lifted him to his feet and looked up into the taller guy's eyes.

"I want you to listen carefully." Julian obeyed, focusing on Haruhi's eyes with a hard serious expression. "My friend here says you won't understand what I tell you if I use regular language. He says I need to paint a picture with words, so that's what I'm going to do. I want you to work with me and do your best to follow along."

Julian nodded.

Haruhi pointed at the bottom right view screen. "Imagine that this is like an one of those adventure games you like to play. Like the one you had on this monitor a minute ago."

Julian nodded. The warship game he'd been playing popped back up on the screen.

She tapped her index finger on his chest. "Except this time it's a game that _you_ developed." She pointed to herself. "And _I'm_ the one playing the game."

Julian nodded again.

"In this game, you're presenting me with rooms. And I get to decide which room I want to play in. So far you've given me two rooms to pick from."

As Julian nodded, the top left view screen switched to display a white grid on a black background. The grid collapsed into the representation of the interior of a three dimensional box - the color of its walls and ceiling changed from black to sky-grey, the color of the floor turned desert-sand-maroon. A white "1" appeared in the view screen's bottom right corner.

The top center view screen displayed the same empty grey-and-maroon-colored room but with a "2" in the bottom right corner.

Haruhi continued, "In room number one there reside three people; Me, my friend Mr. Taniguchi, and the Data Integration Thought Entity."

As Haruhi spoke a full size avatar of a schoolgirl wearing a North High sailor uniform with a yellow hair ribbon appeared in Room 1. Next, the avatar of a male student resembling Taniguchi appeared, standing beside the schoolgirl. Finally, a black nebulous cloud with flashes of lightning illuminating it from within, floated behind the two figures.

"Now listen closely. In room number two we only have _two_ people... Me," Haruhi patted her chest, "and Mr. Taniguchi. But no Data Entity." The top center view screen representing Room 2 displayed the avatars of the schoolgirl and the guy. There was no cloud in the room. "You got that?"

Julian nodded.

"If those two rooms are the only ones I get to pick from," she gripped his shirt and pulled him close, "then I'm going to pick room number two."

After letting him go, Room 1 faded to a reduced brightness level, making Room 2 prominent.

"Now if you were to create a _third_ room that contained me and Mr. Taniguchi _and_ the Data Integration Thought Entity…"

The top right view screen came alive, depicting Room 3. It filled with the three avatars Haruhi listed.

"... as well as Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura..."

Avatars of a shorter schoolgirl with purple hair and another taller girl with waist length blue hair appeared on the third view screen, joining the avatars already present.

"If somebody gave me this _new_ choice to pick from, then I would choose room number three." Haruhi turned and pointed at the top right display. "That one!"

Julian nodded as the top center display dimmed, leaving Room 3 prominent. "Understood." He took his seat and cleared the three Room images, replacing them with blue code-filled screens. He started typing furiously.

"Do you think he got it?" Haruhi asked Taniguchi.

"Oh yeah. He got it."

The two watched as Julian motor-fingered the keyboard for several minutes, intermittently taking several sips of orange soda with one hand as he continued typing with the other. Finally he hit the ENTER key with a resounding thud.

Off to the side two small shapes started materializing. Haruhi and Taniguchi were soon able to make out the torsos of two individuals clothed in North High School sailor uniforms. Moments later the majority of Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura had materialized before them.

Taniguchi turned toward Haruhi. "Hey, weren't both girls naked when they disappeared?"

Haruhi looked at Taniguchi for a few seconds as if he were an idiot. Then he winked at her. She started laughing.

After the last molecules of their shoes materialized, a jubilant Taniguchi ran up to Yuki Nagato and crushed the small girl in his arms.

Haruhi walked up to Ryoko - who was looking around with the stunned expression of someone who just woke up inside another person's dream - and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. "You," Haruhi said as she took Ryoko's hand and led her to the elevator, "need to finish washing my hair!"


	17. Coming Home

.

**Chapter 17: Coming Home**

* * *

Before stepping on to the elevator, Taniguchi scanned the control center one last time. He was pretty sure he'd never be back. They'd left Julian the way they found him; typing furiously, routing and rerouting. As he worked, many of the massive view screens darkened by Haruhi's destructive blue cohorts came back to life. Taniguchi was confident the Entity would be functioning at one hundred percent in no time. He took one last look up through the tinted glass ceiling at the grey sky beyond. What a trip…

Haruhi, Ryoko and Yuki were waiting patiently for him to step aboard. Taniguchi could see that humanoid interfaces Nagato and Asakura were still a bit hazy. He wasn't surprised. Taniguchi guessed they'd spent their time in hibernation, disconnected from everything. He also presumed that Julian had altered the parameters of their data connection to guard against "contamination." The incredibly tight return hug he'd gotten from Yuki moments ago left him confident she'd be fine in a short while; that and knowing that Julian didn't want to piss off Haruhi ever again.

When the elevator doors closed Taniguchi immediately noticed something was off. The car's walls were opaque… and they looked strangely familiar. This was not the sleek modern transparent express car that had shot him from the ground floor up to the control center dome.

"You two are getting out on seven, right?" Haruhi said as she pressed the white button with that number at its center.

Taniguchi squinted at the panel and nodded. Above the elevator's silver doors the floor numbers slowly counted down toward seven. As was her custom, Yuki stared intently at the slit between the doors. When the doors opened, one of Yuki's neighbors, an elderly lady Taniguchi recognized as living three doors down, was preparing to board. Recognizing her neighbor, the lady waited patiently for Yuki and Taniguchi to step out.

Before he did, Taniguchi turned toward Haruhi. "Miss Suzumiya…?"

Haruhi smiled, stepped toward Taniguchi, and gave him a quick tight hug; she whispered into his ear, _"Not a word… to anybody. You got that?"_

Taniguchi nodded as they released each other, his expression saying, _"Understood."_

"Ground floor, please, honey" he heard the old lady say to Haruhi as the doors shut, leaving him and Yuki alone together for the first time in what seemed ages.

"Wow." It was all Taniguchi could think to say. He looked down at the girl standing next to him. "You know, I never dated a real life alien before."

Yuki looked up at him and squeezed his hand. "Neither have I."

* * *

Taniguchi set his closed laptop computer down on the kitchen table and took his seat across from Yuki Nagato. She was nursing a warm cup of tea and seemed almost fully restored. "I felt kind of bad when Haruhi's monsters started taking out those buildings," he said, "but I couldn't think of any other way to get that guy's attention."

"The Entity will repair itself quickly. Miss Suzumiya chose her targets wisely, creating maximum effect with minimal long term damage. No one was injured."

Taniguchi smiled proudly to himself. "It was crazy being in that closed space with Miss Suzumiya. That girl is intense! I know you told me in our story that she doesn't have a clue about her power, but that can't be true. I tell you, after the real world fell away, she was like a fish in water!"

"Perhaps she limits her awareness of her own powers in this reality," Yuki replied. "It would explain much."

"But why would anybody do that?" Taniguchi asked. He thought about it for few moments. "Hmmm, how would I write _that_ story? The only thing that makes sense is that she does it so she can fit in. But she is who she is, so she can't help but let some of her supernatural nature bleed over." Taniguchi put his hand up to his chin. "Or else she's not the only one of her kind. Like in that movie I told you about. Maybe someone else with god powers is managing her amnesia. But why would anybody do that?"

"The answer is yet unknown," Yuki replied. "Even to us. We can only hypothesize."

Taniguchi patted the top of his laptop. "Well it makes for a great story. Maybe I'll include some of that in chapter eighteen." He laughed. "But first I'm going through everything I've written, and I'm changing all the names!"

* * *

Haruhi was on her back in the midst of a deep refreshing slumber when she was partially roused by the sensation of cool air on her bare shoulders. She groaned and felt around for the blanket with her eyes closed. _Darn blanket hog… Oh my! _That was unexpected! Haruhi Suzumiya opened her eyes. She was pleased to see Ryoko Asakura lying next to her. Ryoko was already awake and lying on her side facing Haruhi. Having pulled the cover off of her bedmate, her hands now gently fondled Haruhi's exposed breasts.

"Hey Ryoko!" Haruhi gushed. "You're here!" Haruhi shook the sleep out of her head and turned toward her partner. "You wouldn't believe the dream I just had!"

"Oh really?"

"We were together in the shower, and you were about to wash my hair. But I wanted to use my own shampoo so I left to get it. When I came back you were gone because your Data Entity bosses took you back!"

Ryoko snuggled in close and held the excited nude girl in her arms. She kissed Haruhi on the lips. "Thanks for saving me."

Haruhi shivered and blushed before pulling away a bit. "It was no problem. I wasn't about to let those assholes take you away from me!" Haruhi squealed and looked down with wide eyes when Ryoko playfully pinched her hardening nipples. "You missed those guys, didn't you?"

Ryoko pushed Haruhi onto her back and mounted her. "I missed _all_ of you." She lowered her face toward Haruhi's and their lips met once again, this time followed by a passionate interaction of tongues.

They held each other close, breasts touching and compressing; Haruhi lifted her legs and wrapped them around Ryoko, squeezing her tight. The two girls started rhythmically moving their hips toward each other in synch.

"STOP IT!" Haruhi shouted. "THIS IS DRIVING ME NUTS!"

Haruhi jumped out of bed, leaving a shocked Ryoko looking after her. Haruhi stopped at the bedroom door. "Hang on a second. I need to text someone real quick." She pointed at Ryoko. "Don't you dare disappear on me again!" Ryoko smiled and waited patiently, hugging the bed sheet to her chest as she watched Haruhi's bouncing breasts and bare bottom rush out the door.

In the living room, Haruhi grabbed the smart phone resting on her school bag. She scrolled through her contacts and stopped at the entry for "JULIAN". She smiled when she saw his phone number: a string of 42's. Haruhi selected him as the recipient and composed her text message. After tapping SEND, Haruhi waited a few seconds. The phone chimed and vibrated as it displayed his reply, "Understood."

Haruhi sprinted back into the bedroom and dove back into position beneath Ryoko.

"Who did you text?" Ryoko asked.

Haruhi shot her a wicked smile. "You'll see."

Suddenly Ryoko started rubbing herself at a spot just above her vagina as if she were massaging a sore muscle. "I feel something tingling here."

Haruhi got on her knees and faced her kneeling girlfriend. "I put in an enhancement request."

They both watched with amazement when a shaft started materializing, extending out of Ryoko from the place she'd been rubbing. "Haruhi! What did you do to me?!" She held out her hand, allowing the new body part to solidify in her palm. "What in the world am I going to do with _this_ thing?!"

"I'll show you," Haruhi giggled. She bent forward and took Ryoko's brand new penis into her mouth, welcoming it to the planet. "Mmmm mmmm!" Haruhi said with a full mouth while making a thumbs up sign. She pulled off. "It's PERFECT!" She turned, got on all fours and arched her back while pushing her bare bottom toward her companion. "Penises are the best!" Haruhi smacked her own bottom. "Come on, girl! Quit admiring yourself and let's put our new friend to work!"

Ryoko shrugged. "Okay." Both girls gasped with pleasure as Ryoko slid her new body part deep into Haruhi's vagina.

* * *

**Author's Notes: Wouldn't it be funny if Ryoko got Haruhi pregnant? Anyways, thanks for making it this far, Dear Reader. I guess I would call this point in the story "The End of Part One" with at least two more parts to go. A big thanks to everyone that's PM'd and reviewed thus far.**** It's always fun getting feedback and discussing story ideas.**** - Al Ling  
**


	18. Mikuru Asahina's Predicament

.

**Chapter 18: Mikuru Asahina's Predicament**

* * *

Mikuru Asahina read the note taped to the door. "DO AS YOU PLEASE!" The SOS Brigade's leader had cancelled yet another meeting. Lately she was cancelling more than she was holding. Even when she was present, ruling her subordinates from her commander's chair, Haruhi Suzumiya's mind seemed to be somewhere else.

Mikuru didn't mind too much, though she minded a little. Fortunately Miss Suzumiya hadn't disbanded the group yet. They'd have a meeting tomorrow.

The redhead turned and walked toward the stairwell. Next stop, her shoe locker. Then a lonely walk home.

* * *

Mikuru Asahina softly bit her lower lip after retrieving the note from her shoe locker. It read, "Please meet me at 7:00 at the bench if you can. For fun, nothing serious. #1." The coded note wouldn't have made a bit of sense to anyone but its intended recipient.

The "#1" – revealing the identity of the note's author as the SOS Brigade's #1 member - really wasn't necessary. Mikuru recognized the handwriting. Thousands of benches dotted the city. But Mikuru knew exactly which one the writer meant. She hugged the note to her chest, relishing the warmth that seemed to radiate from it into her bosom.

But what did Kyon want? And why did he go out of his way to say the meeting was for fun and nothing serious?

Mikuru knew the rules. She and Kyon couldn't date; or partake in anything that even resembled dating. Meeting "for fun"… did that resemble dating? Maybe…

She considered calling him. But she didn't want to. She wanted to show up at the park. She wanted to spend time alone with Kyon. She would tell him right then and there that she wasn't allowed to have "fun" with him – not the two of them alone. She would tell him this to his face. That was the right thing to do.

She walked out the school's exit doors and started her trek down the hill. For some reason Mikuru found that she couldn't stop smiling.

* * *

When she got home, Mikuru prepared a quick meal of ramen noodles. Then it was off to the closet. What was she going to wear?

She pulled out a white sun dress. She knew Kyon would love it, but it wasn't quite right for an early evening meeting. She considered wearing jeans, but long pants wouldn't produce a reaction as satisfying as some of her other options. Mikuru turned toward her dresser... and laughed when she pictured herself approaching Kyon wearing her bikini. That would make his day. Heck, it would make his entire year!

Her eyes eventually landed on a red skirt. It was short, but not too short. Mikuru giggled when she recalled Kyon's reaction the first time he saw her wearing it. It was an excellent choice. She paired the skirt with a simple white blouse; one that showcased her breasts quite nicely. Two open buttons would tweak him just the right amount. For a second she considered leaving the top three buttons of her blouse unfastened.

Mikuru examined her outfit in front of the mirror. It was perfect; she giggled and nodded her head, imagining Kyon's expression when she'd approached the park bench.

Then she stepped back and plopped down on her bed with a deep melancholy sigh. Nuts! It wasn't fair! It wasn't fair to Kyon and it wasn't fair to Mikuru. He was one of the sweetest guys in the world, but they could never be more than friends!

Still, being good friends was _something. _And it was much better than nothing._  
_

She checked the clock. It was almost time to go. She walked to the front door, closed the third button of her blouse, and stepped into the hallway.

* * *

The park was adjacent to her apartment building; a quick dash across a busy street took her to the path that led to their favorite park bench. As she walked, Mikuru felt uncommonly light on her feet.

Kyon had promised her fun, which could mean anything. He knew the rules, of course, so Mikuru was confident it wouldn't mean… well, _fun!_ She felt her cheeks flushing as several impure scenarios flashed into her mind. She immediately shook her head clear. Mikuru was sure of one definition of fun - there would be no stressful revelations relating to Haruhi Suzumiya.

Mikuru checked the time display on her cell phone. It read 7:03. She knew Kyon would be punctual or early. Her heart raced a little knowing the best part of her day was about to happen. She absolutely loved watching Kyon's reactions to her outfits. He always wore his appreciation of her on his sleeve.

Mikuru recently learned the meaning of the "sleeve" phrase in a history class. During their jousting matches, knights of old wore the colors of their ladies, represented as ribbons or pieces of colorful cloth tied about their arms. Kyon had always been Mikuru's knight. He'd almost slugged Haruhi Suzumiya in the mouth once in support of her honor. No one had ever done anything like that for Mikuru before. It was a memory she held close to her heart.

As she walked down a flight of concrete stairs, their park bench came into view. Kyon was there, sitting, gazing straight ahead, with a small white box in his lap. She had three stairs to go when his head snapped around; he'd noticed her arrival in his peripheral vision.

There it was! The widening eyes, the look of barely suppressed awe. A hundred guys could look at Mikuru Asahina the way Kyon was currently looking at her. Hundreds had. And she didn't care. But when Kyon looked at her, Mikuru Asahina felt strangely… amazing.

Darn. It was too late to unfasten that third button now!

* * *

Kyon did his best to keep his mouth from dropping open as Mikuru Asahina approached. He focused on Mikuru's sweet happy smile, but his eyes soon dropped down to those gorgeous legs peeking out from under her mid-thigh-length skirt. Fearing he'd be exposed for the pervert he was, Kyon closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. But when his eyes opened and focused once again, they were glued to Mikuru's chest; her full breasts straining against the taut fabric of her white blouse.

He tried to turn his head, but found it was impossible. Fortunately, Mikuru Asahina didn't seem to notice Kyon's internal struggle. She gave him a quick friendly wave and stopped before him.

"Hi Kyon!"

"Hi Miss Asahina. Thanks for meeting me here. I was hoping we could talk for a few minutes."

"Oh sure." Mikuru sat down next to Kyon and crossed her legs. "I wasn't doing anything special." She flipped her long red mane of hair back over her shoulder and turned to face him. "Your note said we were meeting for fun. I was really happy to see that. There's usually so much drama involved whenever we meet here." She looked down into his lap. "What's in the box?"

Kyon gripped the box tightly in his hands, a little stunned that Mikuru had mentioned it so quickly. He was surprised that his hands were shaking. "It's a gift."

Mikuru smiled and nodded. "For who?"

"Um…" Kyon lifted the box and handed it to Mikuru. "It's for you."

Mikuru's eyes widened. She stopped breathing for a few seconds. "… For me? ... From you?"

"I thought it would look really good on you."

Mikuru opened the box. "Wow." She lifted the red ribbon out, studying its silky texture between her thumb and forefinger. "It's beautiful. This material… it's really nice."

"I think it would look great in your hair."

"If I put my hair into a pony tail, huh?" Mikuru's laugh ended in a wide genuine smile.

"I guess you know about that…"

Mikuru's face was flushed red now. "Oh, Kyon."

"At first I wasn't sure red was the right color. But then I noticed how the fabric shimmers in the light and I realized that it really was a perfect match for your hair. It makes it even more beautiful."

For a moment, Mikuru looked like she was about to cry. Then, almost as if Kyon had transformed into a vampire, her visage changed. "Kyon! I can't take this from you! You know that!"

"Why?"

"Because IT'S CLASSIFIED!"

"What?"

Mikuru set the ribbon down in her lap and tried again. "I can't tell you why. But I can't take this. Because it means…"

Kyon watched Mikuru as she tried to express herself. "Look," he said. "I know that you feel responsible for the time Haruhi pulled me into her closed space and almost remade the world. And I'm sure that when you reported that to your bosses, they got kind of concerned."

"Miss Suzumiya…"

"Yes, Haruhi got a little jealous when she saw us playing around by the computer that day. Is that what you're referring to?"

"It's, it's, it's…" Mikuru sighed. "I'm sorry Kyon. It's classified. I can't tell you anything about what they told me or why."

Kyon put his hands out to his sides. "Nobody's here. No one will know."

Mikuru lowered her head. "It's not that. It's like I've been programmed. You know… hypnotized. They really don't trust me to keep any kind of future information to myself. So they made it so I can't tell you things even if I want to. Whenever I try, some part of my brain kicks in and spits out, 'It's classified!'"

"I'll take it from your silence on the matter then, that I'm right about why they're worried."

Mikuru remained stiff, but a quick glance up into Kyon's eyes told him he was right. "I can be your friend, Kyon. Your good friend. But we can't risk creating any other dangerous… situations."

"We can't risk getting Haruhi jealous and suffering the potential catastrophic consequences that might arise from that. Is that what you mean?"

Another quick glance.

"If I told you that Haruhi helped me pick this out for you." Kyon shrugged. "Actually she more than helped. But if you knew that Haruhi knew I'd be giving this to you, with her blessing, would it make a difference?"

_"She did that?"_

Kyon nodded.

Mikuru's sat up straight, her mouth dropped open and her eyes went wide as she processed the information she'd just been given. "Oh my," she finally said.

"Could you take my gift then?"

Mikuru nodded. "Well, if Miss Suzumiya picked this out and wanted me to have it, I'd pretty much have to take it. I'd have no choice. It would be part of my duty."

"Does that mean you can do the pony tail now?"

Mikuru smiled brightly and nodded. "Yes." She lifted the ribbon off of her lap and put it behind her neck, under her hair. She lifted both ends of the ribbon up, shaping her hair into a thick red cord, and looped the ribbon twice about the bundle. She expertly tied the ribbon off into a bow, leaving her hair in the sexiest pony tail Kyon could have imagined. Mikuru slid forward and moved her head from side to side; the pony tail swayed from side to side over her back as she did. "You like?"

Kyon nodded appreciatively. "You're incredibly beautiful." He leaned in toward Mikuru and slowly moved his head in her direction.

Mikuru sat up with a shocked look in her eyes as Kyon's lips approached hers. She winced, looking as if she were trying to hold back a sneeze with all her might. Then, "OOOF!", she punched Kyon directly in the gut.

"OHHHHH!" Kyon buckled over and held his arms over his stomach. It took him a minute to catch his breath. "Damn! That hurt! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!"

"I'm so sorry Kyon!" Mikuru was in tears. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to do that!"

Kyon was slowly regaining his composure. "Then why did you do that?!"

"It wasn't me!" Mikuru hugged herself. "It was … I mean I was … I was programmed!"

"Huh?"

"Whenever we're about to do something that's considered 'more than friends' behavior, I've been programmed to resist you!" Mikuru's crying intensified. Kyon slid toward her and started moving his arm around her shoulder. "NO! DON'T!" She shook her head from side to side, flinging tears in every direction. "Stay away, Kyon! I don't want to hurt you again!"

Kyon let Mikuru bawl for a few minutes. Then, after she seemed to settle a bit, he asked, "Do you want to go out with me?"

"YES! OF COURSE I want to go out with you! There's nothing that I want more in the world! BUT I CAN'T!"

Kyon slid away from Mikuru. He looked over at the distraught girl and smiled. "You mean if it wasn't for your programming, you'd be okay with it if I held you in my arms and kissed you right now?"

"OF COURSE I'D BE OKAY WITH THAT!" Tears started streaming again.

"Then don't worry. We'll figure something out. When there's a will, there's a way."

* * *

**Author's Notes: This marks the unofficial start of Part Two of The Antivirus of Yuki Nagato. It's unofficial because I'm not going to officially label it as such. Part Two will focus on two new story arcs. The first involves Mikuru Asahina. She only got three words in the entire first part so I'm glad to bring her back for a larger role here. The second arc is... CLASSIFIED! As always, PMs and reviews are welcome. - Al**


	19. It's All In My Head

.

**Chapter 19: It's All In My Head**

* * *

Mikuru and Kyon sat across from each other at a booth in the back of the Ling Chong Chinese Restaurant. Though her eyes were still a bit red from crying, Mikuru had a pleased smile on her face. Kyon chuckled as he watched the girl with the sexy auburn ponytail down another mouthful of noodles.

"You seem to be in a better mood now," he said. "Is the food helping?"

Mikuru giggled. "This place is great! I can't believe I've never eaten here before. These noodles are a hundred times better than the instant stuff I usually make." Mikuru looked down at Kyon's gut. "I hope it doesn't hurt when you eat."

Kyon rubbed his belly. "You pack a hell of a punch there." He dipped his egg roll into a small dish of duck sauce and took a bite. "Good thing I'm quick on my feet when you pushed me into the street, or I might have ended up under that bus! That would have really messed up my dinner!"

"There wasn't any bus!" Mikuru laughed. "Besides, what were you thinking trying to hold my hand?"

"I was thinking about how nice it was to be with you and how great that ribbon looked in your hair. I thought it was worth the risk to give it another try."

"Oh, Kyon…" Mikuru dropped her head. "I'm so sorry…" She looked as if she were about to cry again.

Kyon put up his hand. "Don't you dare start that again! We're going to figure this out. We'll be fine. Besides I'm one of the happiest guys in the world just to be sitting here with you tonight."

Mikuru's frown immediately switched to a sincere grateful smile. She nodded silently.

"We just need to figure out what's going on in your head. Now that we have Haruhi's blessing, there shouldn't be any problems."

* * *

Nagato and Taniguchi stepped onto the train and walked back to their favorite seats, in the back of the car, facing forward. Since rush hour had passed, the train wasn't crowded; their seats were open. Their destination was the first station past the Nakamichi Mall.

"So Kari and Mina are roommates, huh?"

Yuki nodded. "They are best friends."

"Well it was nice for them to invite us over to their place for a picture party. Though I'm sure you paid a ton of money for all the pictures from that photo shoot."

"A simple transfer of numbers."

Taniguchi laughed. "For you, maybe! For us humans, that's real money! At least the girls were kind enough to pick up your order. I can't wait to see you in the rest of those outfits." He turned to his girlfriend. "Hey Yuki. Is there any chance that these girls are best friends... with benefits?"

"I imagine that there are many benefits to having a roommate. Lease and utility costs are halved. And the two are never alone."

Taniguchi nodded. Although Yuki hadn't caught the full meaning of his observation, he did notice that his girlfriend was becoming more talkative.

She continued, "They did not strike me as lesbians. Though they might dabble on a lonely night after sharing a bottle of wine."

"Huh?" Taniguchi started laughing. "Why do I get the feeling you're not exclusively reading sci-fi anymore?"

Yuki shrugged with a tiny smile and leaned into her boyfriend, who dutifully put his arm around her shoulder.

"It's been about a week since we left the black city," Taniguchi said.

"Ten days. Eighteen hours. Forty-seven minutes."

"Right… Do you feel any different?"

Yuki tilted her head. "I don't feel different, but I know that I am different. I feel much less… inhibited now. My connection to the Data Integration Thought Entity still exists, but it feels less rigid, much more elastic."

"I sense that," Taniguchi said. "It's like you're becoming way more comfortable with yourself. At least that's the impression I'm getting."

"It's true," Yuki replied. "And I feel more comfortable being with you as well. Before your rescue, I always felt as if I were being watched, constantly monitored. I don't feel that way now." Yuki turned and looked up into Taniguchi's eyes. "I feel as if I've been set free."

"The Entity doesn't want to know what you're doing," Taniguchi said. "They're filtering you out. They're afraid you'll contaminate the collective."

"Yes." Yuki grabbed her boyfriend's hand. "And it's a wonderful feeling."

* * *

Mikuru Asanina lifted up the mini silver restaurant teapot and poured its contents into Kyon's cup. "Would you like more tea?" she asked.

Kyon laughed and nodded. "Always on the job." He took his tea cup and sniffed its contents. "The food might be good here, but their tea doesn't hold a candle to your stuff."

"Kyon… Will you still want to date me if we can't… you know… touch?"

Kyon took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "What exactly did they do to you?"

"It's classified."

Kyon shook his head. "I know they hypnotized you somehow. But I get the impression that it's a much stronger kind of hypnotism. Were you connected to some sort of high tech mind warping machine or did they make you take some kind of drug?"

"It's classified," Mikuru replied, though she'd glanced up when Kyon said the word "drug". She closed her eyes and winced. "I feel so bad when I give myself away like that. I know that's a strange thing to say, but I do."

"Your organization can't monitor you in any way, can they?" He frowned. "Damn, can you even tell me that?"

"No, they can't monitor what I do. And the only things I can't tell you are organization secrets… and of course things that I think might have some bearing on the future."

"That _you think?_ So it's really up to you in the end?"

Mikuru nodded. "Yes. I know it's not a secret that I can't be monitored. Heck, that's why they went through all the trouble to program me! That's gotta be pretty obvious."

"It's obvious to you." Kyon crossed his arms over his chest. "Damn, this is tough!"

"What is?"

"Well if they drugged you with some super special kind of future drug, I can't counter that."

"You mean with regular hypnotism or something?"

"Right." Kyon groaned. "Though that wasn't exactly what I had in mind."

"What did you have in mind?" Mikuru probed.

"What would happen if I got you drunk? And then… you know."

Mikuru giggled and blushed. "And then took advantage of me?"

Kyon sheepishly nodded.

"I think I'd still automatically resist up until the point I passed out. There might be a chance of causing brain damage if my brain goes on autopilot while I'm drunk and starts pulling in two directions at the same time. I'm not sure."

"There's no way in the world I would risk that!"

Mikuru smiled. "I know."

"I guess I could make a move on you after you passed out…"

"KYON!"

"Just kidding!" Kyon shot Mikuru a sly smile. "What fun would that be?" He instinctively moved his hand across the table toward Mikuru's. She pulled it back with a start. "Sorry. I keep forgetting."

Mikuru sighed.

"What does it feel like when you resist?"

Mikuru looked up and thought about it for a minute. "Well, it's like all of a sudden the creepiest guy in the world was touching me or trying to kiss me and I had to get away from him as fast as possible."

"Did you see me as a creepy guy when I tried to kiss you?"

"No. Of course not!" Mikuru blushed. "You looked so sweet … But I resisted as if you were a creep."

"Still, it's all in your head, though."

"That's right." Mikuru pointed to her head. "It's all up here."

* * *

**Author's Notes: Sorry for the shorter chapter. I had more to write, but I'm trying to discipline myself to post at least one chapter per week and I'm already past the deadline!**


	20. Picture Party

.

**Chapter 20: Picture Party**

* * *

Taniguchi knocked on the apartment door twice. After a brief wait, a stunning tall girl in a short black leather skirt answered the door with a wide smile. "YUKI! You're here!" She gave the shorter girl a tight hug.

"Hello, Kari."

"It's great to see you again! Come on in." She waved them past her into the living room. "It's nice to see you, too, boyfriend." Kari acknowledged Taniguchi with a pat on the back. "Have you been taking good care of our girl?"

"You know it," Taniguchi replied, surprised that the girl had spoken to him.

Mina, sitting on the couch with one leg crossed over the other, looked equally stunning in a short sleeve white crop top and black micro mini skirt; the outfit left her toned torso bare. "YUKI!" Mina hopped off the couch and rushed over to give the shorter girl a bear hug. "Let me help you with that coat."

Yuki unbuttoned her coat and handed it to Mina. "Thank you."

Mina stepped back and took inventory. "Still looking hot as ever!"

Taniguchi had to agree. Although Yuki was decked out in a less revealing red dress, it hugged her body tightly accentuating Yuki's perfect figure. Unlike Kari and Mina, Yuki wore no makeup. _With a smile like that,_ Taniguchi thought, _who needs makeup?_

"Come on. Let's dive right in." Kari motioned the girls toward a small tea table set atop an ornate square rug. Atop the table sat several stacks of large photographs, a pricey bottle of Kenko Estates Cabernet Sauvignon, and three large wine glasses. "I can't believe you sprung for the ultimate package, Yuki. These pictures must have cost you 200,000 Yen!" (approx. $2000 US)

"It was not a problem. My credit card has no limit."

"You rock Yuki!" Mina chimed in. She walked over to a nearby stereo system and turned on the music. Before joining her friends at the tea table, Mina motioned for Taniguchi to follow her to the kitchen. She patted a large cardboard box sitting on the kitchen table. "We've got a job for you, boyfriend. We need your help for the second half of this Picture Party. Everything you'll need is in this box. Your job is to figure out how to use this stuff. Got that?"

A perplexed Taniguchi nodded his head and replied, "Okay. I'll do my best."

"Kari and I both thought you seemed like a really good guy, and Yuki absolutely thinks the world of you. So we're going to try something new and crazy tonight. After we down that bottle of wine and finish looking at all those pictures, we should totally be in the mood for part two of this Picture Party." Mina patted Taniguchi on the back. "Don't let us down."

Taniguchi stared at Mina for a few moments with furled eyebrows. He shrugged. "I'll do my best."

Mina winked at him and bolted for the tea table, kneeling next to Yuki. As Mina and Yuki studied pictures from their photo shoot, Kari filled their wine glasses with cabernet sauvignon. Before passing the full glasses to her friends, Kari made sure the powder she'd deposited in each glass had completely dissolved.

"Check this one out," Mina said. "Isn't that an excellent angle?"

When Kari looked at the photo Mina held, she started laughing. "That blue skirt makes my butt look enormous!" She took a full sip of her wine, noting with a smile that the crushed Ecstasy tablet she'd spiked the drink with did not noticeably alter its taste.

Mina held up another picture. "I think out of all of us, Yuki has the cutest butt." She also took a healthy gulp of the tasty liquid, winking at Kari as she did.

"I think Kari's bust is most impressive," Yuki said, holding up a third sample, taking a big gulp of wine as well.

* * *

Taniguchi stood several feet away in the kitchen. He watched the girls through the small service hatch. They seemed to be having the time of their lives feasting on sexy photographs and top shelf wine.

He had been assigned a very important task, though he wasn't exactly sure what it was yet. The answers lay inside the mystery box. Taniguchi ripped open the top of the box and found that it held several smaller boxes inside it. A manual resting on top of the boxes entitled "Amateur Digital Photography Studio Kit" gave him the first clue to what his night held in store.

He picked up a long slender box and shook it. It was a tripod. Another box held a strobe light, another a reflector. "Wow!" Taniguchi gasped as he saw the last box. A Nikon Digital SLR with accompanying zoom lens! This top of the line camera was easily worth 100,000 Yen!

Again, Taniguchi looked over at the girls; giggling happily, swaying to the loud techno music, laughing at their pictures – sipping their wine.

He ripped open all the boxes and started reading the directions. As fast as was humanly possible, Taniguchi vowed to transform himself into the best amateur digital photographer the world had ever seen!

* * *

The wine bottle was empty when Yuki set the last picture down on the stack. By this time Taniguchi felt quite comfortable with the Nikon SLR and the other gadgets in the studio kit. The manual had been helpful; like a good photographer he'd spied out three fantastic backdrops for the amateur photo shoot – plus a fourth he could use if he got very, very lucky.

Mina was the first girl to stand. Though her footwork seemed a little off, she spun and danced to the techno beat with a content glazed grin. Taniguchi was nearly overwhelmed by the scantily dressed girl's sexiness.

"Where do you want us to pose, Misssster Photographer?" she teased with a wiggle of her hips.

"Let's start over there." Taniguchi pointed toward the wall length drapes covering the sliding glass doors leading to the balcony. It wasn't a seamless photo studio background, but it wasn't bad place to start.

"Come on, Yuki!" An equally buzzed Kari stood and reached down for Yuki's hand. Yuki giggled and stared up at the ceiling as if it were a moving cloud, before finding her balance and stumbling toward the drapes.

Taniguchi quickly moved the portable fill light and reflector into place. Soon three very inebriated girls were having a blast posing in front of his Nikon lens. The atmosphere was surprisingly conducive to fun; loud techno music blared, the air seemed warm and sticky, the room was pleasantly dim. Though this dimness was punctuated by continual flashes from Taniguchi's equipment, it didn't seem to bother his models.

Drawing on his memory of the countless girly magazines he'd perused, Taniguchi guided the girls through several hot poses - bent forward with hands on knees showing cleavage; profile shot, breasts pressed into back, right legs forward; butt shot, girls looking back over their shoulders with hands on hips. At times the giggling models looked as if they were about to fall over with laughter. Even Yuki was acting in a way Taniguchi could never have imagined, laughing wholeheartedly while stumbling around.

The girls had just as much fun when Taniguchi coaxed them to his second backdrop; the couch. Kari dove atop the seated Mina and Yuki, and flipped up her skirt, revealing a gorgeous bottom left mostly uncovered by her thong underwear.

Not surprisingly, things really got out of hand at Taniguchi's third backdrop, Mina's bedroom. Three models easily fit on her queen-sized bed. Taniguchi got several awesome shots of the girls bouncing and falling upon each other.

(It was at this point that Taniguchi made a mental note of the wine the girls had been drinking. If a single bottle of Kenko Estates Cabernet Sauvignon could make three gorgeous women this uninhibited and wild, he was going to buy stock in the company.)

Then it happened.

Kari reached for the knot holding Mina's crop top together. Mina only laughed when her top fell open revealing a set of awesome breasts. The open top opened the floodgates. About 276 Nikon snapshots later, all three girls were completely naked – and making the most of it.

"You're incredible, Yuki!" screamed Kari. Kari and Yuki were on all fours atop the bed, Yuki orally stimulating Kari's vagina from behind. Yuki moaned loudly as Mina, kneeling at the edge of the bed, forced her mouth deep inside Yuki's most private regions and went to work with her tongue as well. Yuki and Kari simultaneously climaxed several steamy hot minutes later.

"You can play, too," Mina shouted at Taniguchi with a wicked smile. "The kit has a tripod, you know!"

At this point Taniguchi pinched himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming. He wasn't. So he stripped off his clothes and dove into the fray.

Three on one... Taniguchi couldn't believe it. He was living out his wildest fantasies. As the camera worked on autopilot atop the tripod, programmed to take one shot every ten seconds, three gorgeous nude women were taking turns going down on him. Taniguchi was pleased when the Nikon flashed as Mina and Kira were licking his testicles while Yuki worked his shaft with her mouth. That shot was getting poster treatment!

Not much later, all three girls were on their hands and knees, side by side, their shapely bare bottoms near the edge of the bed, breasts dangling, Yuki in the middle taking Taniguchi's rigid cock while Kira to her left and Mina to her right enjoyed the clitoral stimulation of Taniguchi's dexterous fingers. As if it were a dream, all three girls climaxed simultaneously before falling together into a satisfied tangled mess of arms, legs, breasts and bottoms.

Instead of being a long shot, Taniguchi's fourth backdrop, the Jacuzzi tub and shower, seemed like a natural end point. Taniguchi made sure his nude models' lovely bodies were covered with lots of bubbles before dutifully documenting the kissing, giggling, rubbing, and moaning that occurred next. When he couldn't stand to watch it any more, Taniguchi hopped into the bathtub and joined them.

Part two of the Picture Party ended sublimely with Mina and Kari passing out in each other's arms at one end of the Jacuzzi, while a fully spent Yuki passed out in her boyfriend's arms at the other end.

Taniguchi looked over at his only other conscious friend, the Nikon SLR on the tripod snapping pictures once every ten seconds. The Nikon's final shot of the evening displayed a young man with a bright wide smile flashing a thumbs up sign.

* * *

Fortunately the closet was loaded with towels. Taniguchi dried himself off and put on his boxer shorts. He surveyed the scene - three exhausted nude women snoozing in swirling warm water. It was clean up time and there was only one person alert enough to do it.

Taniguchi started with the tallest girl. He lifted Kari out of the tub and laid her down atop some towels on Mina's bed. After drying her off, he lifted the naked girl up into his arms. Though she was deep asleep, Kari reflexively put her arms around Taniguchi's neck and pulled him close as he carried her down the hall toward her bedroom.

He deposited Kari in her own bed and left her snoozing peacefully under the sheets. He considered dressing her in her pajamas, but decided against it. It didn't seem right to cover something so beautiful.

Though equally beautiful, Mina was a little bit lighter. She turned and pulled the bed sheet over herself seconds after Taniguchi deposited her dried-off naked body on her bed. As Mina snored peacefully, Taniguchi went to work on Yuki. It took him about thirty minutes to fully dry and dress his girlfriend. It was a labor of love. As the lightest of the three, Taniguchi reasoned, the wine had probably hit her the hardest.

Taniguchi considered letting Yuki sleep it off on the couch, but decided taking her home was the best option. They'd all done some mighty crazy stuff and avoiding "morning after" embarrassments seemed like the wisest choice.

* * *

"That was one hell of a Picture Party," Taniguchi said. He and Yuki were on the train heading home. Taniguchi had his arm around his girlfriend. She still had her head on his shoulder and was sound asleep. Having a small girlfriend had a lot of upsides, Taniguchi realized, especially when you have to carry her to the train.

He patted the Nikon SLR at his side, which hung from a strap about his shoulder, and imagined the next picture party.

* * *

Taniguchi was startled by a sweet voice.

"Did you have fun last night?" Yuki asked.

Taniguchi opened his eyes and got his bearings. He was in Yuki's bedroom, on the floor cushion, under the comforter, his kneeling naked girlfriend looking down at him, morning light streaming in through gaps in the drapes. He looked up into Yuki's eyes and laughed. "I used to think walking around in closed space was something special, but that was definitely the most amazing night of my life."

Yuki brushed Taniguchi's hair back and smiled warmly. "Then I'm happy."

"That was no ordinary bottle of wine, was it?"

Yuki shook her head. "Kari laced the wine with a substantial amount of MDMA."

"Huh? What's that?"

"Three-four-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine."

"Huh?"

"Ecstacy."

"DAMN YUKI! No wonder everyone was so fucking nuts! LITERALLY! When did you figure out they drugged you?"

"We all knew from the start."

Taniguchi considered Yuki's words for a while and let them sink in. Finally he said, "You set all this up … for me?"

Yuki nodded.

"Why?"

Yuki slid under the covers next to her boyfriend, pulled him close and kissed him on the cheek.

"Because you came for me. Thank you for saving my life."

* * *

**Author's Notes: What can I say? I kind of felt inspired to turn up the heat a little in this chapter. Let me know what you think, dear reader. PM or review. You know the drill! Thanks. - Al**


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